A true friend wouldn't forget your birthday?

[Anonymous]

do you agree? it's my birthday. there is this girl I had been friends with although lately she hasn't been so nice/i doubt that she really likes me anymore even though we were good friends.

i don't have a FB but I told her a few weeks ago that my birthday is today.

if she forgets I would be pretty offended...all my good friends wished me happy birthday, even without Facebook they remembered.

is it fair of me to be offended if she forgets? I mean it's the weekend come on. we were friends for 5 years.

Updates

+1 y

i would not stop talking to her but I would hold her as less of a friend. because I told her specifically when it was. if she cared enough as a friend she would remember.

Updates

+1 y

it's not just the birthday thing. she hasn't been nice lately and has been bitchy and only there when she wants something. so I guess this is just the icing on the cake.

Updates

+1 y

ok to clarify something...she hasn't been acting nice for a while now. acting demeaning, bossy, and only talking to me to boast about herself. her behavior changed a LOT lately. then this feels like the last straw.

[blackwaterhattie]

I can't get on board with you on this one. I never remember anyone's birthday, not mine, not my best friend of 20 years, not my parents', not even mine. The ONLY person's whose birthday I remember is my daughter's- for obvious reasons. For some reason I can't recall dates but I can remember astrological signs, so all my people know they can expect a happy birthday from me when their sign comes up. Nobody gets pissed at me for it or anything, and I'm glad because it's not like I'm being a d*** on purpose. Other than the birthday thing I am a pretty good friend, so maybe you should cut yours some slack. Maybe you're still very young, but I have to tell you that I don't know any fully fledged adults who get pissy about people forgetting their birthdays- it's just another day. I'm just saying.

[blackwaterhattie]

And if she's already being an a**hole, why are you still worried about her?

[Asker]

Because she used to be much nicer

[blackwaterhattie]

Times and people change. I had a boyfriend who used to be date women and now he's gay. He was gay all along, he was just trying to be "normal". He's happier now- he has a hot Brazilian boyfriend who adores him. My point is, maybe your friend was just a closet a-hole and now circumstances are such that she's out of the closet... so to speak. Have you mentioned to her that she's kind of being an a-hole? You might consider that. Maybe she doesn't realize it. You have an obligation to her to be honest.

[Hidden_P]

I want to agree a true friend wouldn't forget.

However, I am one of the most forgetful people on the planet. I almost forgot to wear trousers to work. My friends just laugh when I forget things.

Did she remember at all? Like before or after but not on the day? I do that a lot.

I think the key here is the fact she's changed... when you have a long term friendship, it sort of becomes more of a relationship? Like me and my friend fell out recently, been friends 5 years. And our texts were like we need to talk haha. Has she had anyone new in her life? Boyfriend, friend, new job? Anything that may have caused this change?

[smokahontas]

I don'tknow, some people really suck at remembering Birthdays. Many people have depended on Facebook to remember them. I have a good friend of 8 years and I still do not remember her birthday, all I know is that it is in July. I never get offended if someone forgets my birthday, I just do not find them as special now.

[Anonymous]

Oh not necessarily, it depends on what's going on in her life. If she's super busy, stressed out, etc. She could easily forget. Right now I work 12-15hr days pretty much every day and hardly have a chance to do laundry. My birthday is coming up in about a week and to be honest I couldn't care less about it.

[Anonymous]

I would hope there are other qualities that are more important to you in a friend that being perfect about remembering dates that are important to YOU.

[Opinion Owner]

@Update: that's a different story. All things considered (not just the birthday thing) it sounds like you have reason to be upset with her.

[Anonymous]

Happy Birthday!

I had this issue a couple months ago, several people in my life either forgot or ignored my birthday. It's one of those things - it's not THAT big of a deal, but it just makes me question how much they really care, that they can't even say Happy Birthday.

As for your friend, it doesn't sound like she's much of a friend. I'd say the friendship is over, I'm sorry :-\

Side note: The day isn't over yet.

[Asker]

aw thanks! going out tonight :) yeah I think the friendship is over. when I was 16-19 we were very close then she went away for college but we were still pretty good friends although the last year she turned kind of bitchy and just different. if she hasn't contacted me for weeks and hasn't been nice when she does I guess it is over. I'm 22 so I guess I'm at that age where people are growing apart although I am still close with some old friends from high school.

[Opinion Owner]

It happens to the best of friends sometimes.

It sounds like you'll be better off anyway.

Have fun tonight! :-D

[MissAM]

It's possible she really did accidentally forget. I mess up remembering birthdays all the time (thank goodness for belated birthday wishes cards! XD) but I feel horrible when I do forget.

Anyway, I hope you have a happy birthday today! ^__^v

[kangaru]

I do feel that true friends will not forget our birthdays.

A good friend will not be bitchy, bossy etc, so if your friend behave in this way I would call her toxic

[Anonymous]

Not true at all. I have a lot of best friends and I don't even know their birth days.

[Anonymous]

I agree. But some people aren't good with birthdays

[Asker]

well she used to talk about how it's impt...so...also in general she has been very neglectful lately

[Anonymous]

There's so many birthdays its easy to forget especially if somebody has been busy.

[Yanira]

Happy birthday...

[Asker]

Thanks :)

[Yanira]

Don't worry about your friend ... If she doesn't then you know you deserve better your beautiful don't let that ruin your birthday baby girl (: take care