Why are some attractive people insecure about their looks?

Question

noubigdumbdumb · Accepted Answer

There's many reasons for this and it could vary from person to person. For instance, I am of a Chinese background and I think I look a bit above average, but many girls at school (I am in a relationship) compare me with Kpop stars and such, who are basically definitely more attractive (basically saying things like wow he just looks like a slightly less hot version of this person). For me personally I feel like I have to uphold a standard of how I look, and when I see flaws that may not seem as big of a deal to others but to me it becomes a big deal. I guess this does make me lowkey insecure about it in a way, but I am growing to make myself feel better about it and appreciating what I have.

AriesMale · Accepted Answer

People treat them differently, and this can really mess up their head space.

When I bring it all the way to 💯 it intimidates everyone around me. People talk to you less, only the confident ones will approach. Then there’s the weird kiss-ass who let you walk all over them, it’s an ego boost but it’s fleeting.

In my mind when I walk out the door, I expect overall friendliness and positivity and attraction. The reality I get however is I’m treated like eye candy, I’m red taped and unapproachable, and intimidating over confidence. I made the freaking effort freaking give me compliments ffs.. (harder for guys)

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

Many people tell me I'm attractive and beautiful. I don't really think so myself.
I don't think I'm particularly ugly either, but I've been called so many times too.

As for being considered "attractive", many men can say so when they have ulterior motives towards you. After you show them you're not interested in them that way, they will say stuff like "you're not my type anyway", "it's not like you're that beautiful", etc.

Being attractive is very subjective. Better not to attract the wrong people.

BeeNee · Accepted Answer

They are human. Most of us see what we think are our flaws magnified times ten even if no one else thinks they are a problem. Also with that type of beauty comes expectation that one must remain so and flawless and act or be a certain way especially with the opposite sex. That can actually be hard to deal with.

Spawnface · Answer

People have problems understanding their own thoughts. Their limited memory means they immediately forgot almost every reaction they experience. A lot of the times people can't cope or comprehend with the truth and blame something more simplistic. Often blaming oneselfs looks for their own short comings is due to the person being unable to express complex thoughts and feeling better about blaming anything else easier to label. When people can't address their negative traits correctly, they invent slogans of not feeling pretty. Having to defend their own positikns they trick themselves into believing their own lies. Its a coping mechanism.

Another thing that can happen is peoples emotions have a residual lingering effect over their face. Often being under stress for so long, they begin to forget how stressed they are while their body is still experiencing the stress. They can mistake the look of their own discomfort as being ugly. In reality any happy person with a genuine smile is hard to think of as ugly.

RetroReginald · Answer

Everybody is their own worst critics. It's always been that way and to a degree it can be very helpful to help people motivate themselves to do something. For example a person who thinks their ugly might brush their teeth more and practice doing makeup until they're really good at it. But having OCD over these thoughts, as well as any other thoughts, can be really damaging and dangerous to their mental health, especially if they have disorders, like I do. I'm bipolar so it's so easy for me to go downhill with my negative comments about myself, and can even cause suicide. Did you know men commit more suicide than women because they feel they can't share their feelings or "weaknesses" with others? So sad :( We are human and really rely on others to help us see our own self-worth, so with the right support system, things can get better. I only think people avoid help all together because they are not sure of what is normal; between being too depressed with themselves and too egotistical. They are trying to find the definition of "normal" when they should just feel comfortable with themselves. Personally, I think I'm really ugly, but I don't care. I don't stress over it, and I let it be. I just hope someone sees past my ugliness and likes me, and fortunately I have a lot of people who care about me so I don't really care at this point if I think I'm ugly or not. It doesn't bother me so why should I care, lol? And besides, obviously, how attractive someone is is subjective to the observer, because there are people I know who say/think that I am cute and even sexy, and then I know some who think I'm ugly... so this further helps me grasp that this is nothing to stress over because I can change what others think about me no matter what I do to my face/body. So that's why I think it's so important to be comfortable with yourself. I still think I'm ugly but if my lover thinks I'm cute as hell, then I'm not complaining, haha!

NoxWriter22 · Answer

I'll answer your question with a story. I started tweezing my arm hair out of boredom one day. The more I tweezed the more hairs I realized I had. Really small hairs. I only tweezed my left arm and my right arm. Was significantly hairier. No one noticed. No one said anything. I noticed a lot because I had spent so long staring at my arm hair. The more I focused on it the more details become noticable.

Beautiful people don't wake up beautiful. They craft themselves almost artistically. Makeup is used with careful skill. They invest their money in beauty products and their time skillfully using those products. When you spend so much time looking at yourself, you can see cracks in your skin and many small "flaws" that most people won't notice at all. It's hard not to wonder if anyone notices all the flaws that you do.

courtney06 · Answer

It's possible they base their self-image on other people's opinions too heavily. They may have some features that are considered unattractive or not as beautiful by some people. Perhaps those features made them stand out causing them to be ridiculed growing up or have a more difficult time making friends. Maybe from their point of view, all the people who were fancied didn't have the same features as them so in turn they thought their looks didn't measure up.

It's true looks are subjective.

Syatesxo · Answer

Because sometimes people don’t think they are attractive, even though they get told they are. it’s all about self esteem and how someone values them self. If you have low self esteem you aren’t going to have a lot of confidence in yourself and will just feel insecure, it’s all in the mind.

Texas_born · Answer

I always ask myself this question. Knowing the insecurities I had to get accustomed to carrying, and looking at strikingly gorgeous women, I just want to shake them and and scream " WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU INSECURE ABOUT?"
But we're all human, and we all have our insecurities.

Shezadi · Answer

I just want to say that Aiza Khan is the most beautiful woman on the planet. She is sooooooo pretty. She is married and has two children and still looks like a 20 year old.

She looks so pretty in her drama called, "Koi chand rakh."

Pakistanis are gorgeous and the most beautiful people on the planet.

Bobaprincess · Answer

I constantly get told I am pretty by the hottest people but still I will receive one negative comment from the dustiest ugliest broken down people and it still makes me feel bad. But I have low self esteem too but one thing I have learned from this is that they are just jealous

The1Guy · Answer

We are conditioned to evaluate everything the way our environment does. If she they were made to believe that they are not attractive by those close to them or mabie even comparing themselves to the tv, they will be insecure about their appearance, even if they are beautiful.

There's nothing more subjective than beauty, I think.

DiegoO · Answer

Some attractive people suffer/ed bullying. That undermine anyone confidence and distort the self image.

Consider the fact that not all attractive people have an easy life. Life can be cruel and attractive individuals don't escape from that reality.

Eyes_On_Me · Answer

There aren't many people in the world who actually like how they look. Attractive people tend to get judged based on their appearance quite frequently and their flaws are easily visible. Therefore, it's easy for them to get caught up on one of their flaws and obsess over it.

DelilahRose · Answer

Maybe they get so much attention that they feel extra pressure to be perfect or look a certain way. They might be really tough on themselves and feel that they don't look good or as good as they could look.

Elaurious · Answer

Because jealous people treat them ugly, also we see ourselves as way less attractive than we really are for some reason.

JSmuve · Answer

This probably applies more to guys than girls but how is attractiveness measured? Other peoples opinions. So if no one tells someone that they're attractive, then are they attractive? Maybe. Maybe not. But it does make one question their attractiveness and thinking that you're not attractive engenders insecurity.

StephenCF · Answer

I’ve been told occasionally that I’m attractive. What makes me insecure is the fact that I’ve had an unusual amount of rejections from women for a guy who’s been called “attractive”. I’m constantly friendzoned, and feel those who compliment me are liars just looking for me to show gratitude

Anonymous · Answer

People are insecure because they have been being their faces since the time they were born. They are stuck with it so it just seems normal at first and then when we actually start to criticize ourselves it seem as if we are below average. That's why people are insecure about themselves regardless how pretty/ugly they are.

Anonymous · Answer

I don't know... I think it's because there are more women out there who may look better than I am, that's why it makes me feel insecur. Even though I don't look bad, I'm not the most attractive one, and I know and fear that there will be others who look better than I am.

litty · Answer

People get used to themselves like how one gets used to their surroundings. They may be bored of themselves, or they admire others and want to look like them (E. g. Kardashians, Britney Spears). Others thrive on attention too, so they'll measure their worth on likes on their pictures. The best mix is to be happy with what you have, but also knowing that there is plenty room for improvement.

Anonymous · Answer

Sometimes they are suffering with mental health issues. Body dysmorphic disorder and depression immediately come to mind. Other times, they may be self-conscious or have a history of being bullied.
Also, attractiveness is very subjective, so even if you think they are beautiful, they might not see that in themselves.

Servus09 · Answer

People are insecure about all sorts of things. When I was younger, I often worried about doing well on tests. Sometimes the stress was so much I wouldn't even bother studying for an exam. I couldn't fail if I never tried, right? That mindset put me back many years of personal growth.

I doubt that being attractive would have helped me with this insecurity.

Logorithim · Answer

I'd wager that most of them do not even realize that they are attractive. Having low self-esteem usually goes hand in hand with underestimating one's attractiveness.

KezHarris · Answer

Because other girls bully them and exclude them socially. Guys try to bring down their self esteem, just so they can sleep with them.  I see this happening all the time.

TrustOfWorthington · Answer

Maybe becausr being pretty means that almost every idiot male of this planet will possibly try to get in bed with her and after that leave and go to the next? Which makes it astonishingly hard to find the perfectly matching partner as anyone displays himself so, that you should think he us the one...

Felinegirl · Answer

Because they don't realise they're attractive. Or because they have even higher standards for themselves.

Clo917 · Answer

Probably cause we're our own worse critics. While others might see them as attractive, they don't see it themselves because they're too focused on the minor flaws instead which breeds insecurity.

Purple_Babe14 · Answer

Because just because you see beauty they might not. They could be the prettiest/ handsomest indivitual in the world but think they're ugly.

KupKakes · Answer

They have a distorted image about themselves. They genuinely don’t look at themselves properly. They don’t see how attractive they are! It’s kind of sad, mostly because they may have low self esteem.

nojokecarmichael · Answer

-Common flaws they don't like -Jealousy and hate from others (I dealt with this in high school, people didn't tell me or other girls said the opposite & tried to ostracize me) -Mental health

Wemix · Answer

They can say they're not that great out of modesty. Also people tend to judge themselves harder than strangers would because they're always trying to become a better person.

Anonymous · Answer

Because being attractive attracts a lot of creeps and a lot of hate especially from other women.
It is also extremely hard to have problems, shitty and terrible life problems but then people tell you 'oh come on you dont have problems looking like that'
And the day you do not look put together, everyone is confused why you look that way and make comments.
Especially someone who doesn't know they look good and has low self esteem.
Looks aren't everything. Fuck looks.

Alice2398 · Answer

Because it treated as if that's the only good thing about us and once that's gone we're nothing and it's always expected of us to look great 24/7

AlexanderBrunnrgaard · Answer

Because there's always someone more good looking. No matter how stunning you are, and as with everyone else, insecurities are born out of the knowledge that someone out there is better in some way.

MimiHashima · Answer

Comparing themselves to someone else especially that they see higher “ranked” than they are, can have a rather negative effect on their self esteem contributing to their views of themselves.

CubsterShura · Answer

Because it isn't about your looks. It is about your attitude, mindset and self-esteem, all of which isn't automatically guaranteed with looks.

tonicandgin · Answer

Because we think we're ugly even though people tell us the opposite. We assume they're just being nice

Brand6n95 · Answer

Beauty is subjective and on based off of opinion. The judgement of others then become what we are measuring our attractiveness on and as we are not in control of that it is easy to get desperate and assuming little details about oneself are issues

nathanp97 · Answer

People look at themselves a lot and can spot all the little flaws that no one else does. They then focus on the little imperfections.

JubJub_Hi · Answer

Because they know what they look like when they wake in the morning and worst moments

Kenni · Answer

Cause they don't get approach.  I'm being told I'm good looking, but guys are too intimidated by me or people are lying😂

Bishop-Brennan · Answer

Why are so many average people OK with their looks?

angry_llama · Answer

Lot of reasons actually Some are mentally scared and traumatized, so they're not able to thing anything positive about themselves

Ecco939 · Answer

Some people are not told they are pretty or handsome when growing up. Or they are told the opposite. Whether it is due to an interest of others not to 'objectify' them or jus because they are not stunning does not matter. The results are the same.

Kaneki05 · Answer

Cause they are weird, if i was attractive i would bloody know it and wouldn't be insecure.

Marklaw12 · Answer

The human body is never satisfied. Also, Attractive people will always have a weird body part. No one can be 100%.

Wolframium · Answer

Maybe they don't know how attractive they are to others. Which is good, so shut up about it. Nobody needs cocky, too confident and attractive people.

Udbhav_Bantwal · Answer

One of the most common reason is that they've just never had anyone in their life to appreciate them or compliment them...

norejay20 · Answer

Everybody see something wrong with them. Not everyone is perfect.

Muhammad1999 · Answer

Because jealous people often put them down and then they think they are ugly , happened to me a lot of times as some guys label me as ugly while girls tell the opposite

Nathy1995 · Answer

TBh I know I'm attractive some of the time but I don't know I see guys like Jason mamoa and I'm like damn I'm not cute or like I just focus too much on my features to the point that I hate them

archiz · Answer

It s not what others See, it s more what they see and what expectations they make of themselves

alice55 · Answer

It's not because you see them as attractive that they see themselves as attractive too.

BigToeJohn420 · Answer

Because some unattractive are very secure about them selves?

gingerrockmomma · Answer

Media's air brushed, photoshopped beauty expectations

tartaarsaus · Answer

A) lack of success with the opposite sex B) magnifying flaws C) general insecurity due to other causes that flows over to body image

Windstriker · Answer

The prettier they are more "flaws" will they spot on themselves. Really all they need is someone who really cares, not about looks, but everything. My opinion at least.

Dark93 · Answer

Because they see celebrities and figureheads being insecure and they think to themselves "if that beautiful celebrity thinks she's ugly, then I must be a cow"

Sabrina_gomez · Answer

Because a "certain someone" doesn't like them  or pay attention to them!

Im_Emma · Answer

I guess it’s just a thing most people do. That’s how society is now.

Anonymous · Answer

Attractive people still get rejected sometimes. I’m not sure why you’d expect them to be insecurity free

19irish76 · Answer

We all have insecurities. I also believe we all see ourselves in the mirror in a far different way than the public sees

Why are some attractive people insecure about their looks?

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Why do so many attractive women seem so insecure about their looks?

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