Has my flirting got me a negative reputation?

[Anonymous]

I'm a massive flirt and will flirt with a lot of women, but it seems to have given me the reputation of a player. Now I am not a player, I don't play women, yet despite this because I'm flirty with lots of women I seem to come across this way.

A recent example of this was at a work do where I was having a quiet one on one conversation with one girl where we were flirting a lot, there was subtle touching, lots of laughter and then an hour or so later I was doing the same thing with another girl. The gossip at work is that I was trying to score with both girls and this couldn't be further from the truth. I'm simply a guy that likes flirting and had a bit of alcohol in my system, so my inhibitions were far lower.

Is my perceived reputation justified?

[x_psychedelic_x]

Trust me I'm a girl but I'm a manipulative person so I understand what your talking about. You need to lay off flirting in the work place, anywhere else, even Starbucks would be fine. The work place is the gossip system of a high school. And being placed by women as a player is not going to get you laid ANYTIME soon. If you want these women in your workplace respect you again you should apologize to them for flirting with them in the first place and having them take it the wrong way because that's not the way that you meant it. You should apologize because if this goes home with any of the women and they tell any of their boyfriends or husbands you can get in trouble and get fired for that matter.

[gatorgirl15]

I honestly have the same problem, I'm just a naturally really friendly person and people take that as flirting. Personally, I think it's a no harm, no foul kind of thing, but a lot of people (more sensitive, less flirty people) think otherwise. You have to learn to tone it down at times, ESPECIALLY in the work place - that can get you in a lot of trouble. Keep it to the people that you know don't take it seriously.

[dinosawrroxxxo]

You may be leading on other girls with your flirting and it may hurt them when you flirt with another girl. Also, if you're trying to intentionally flirt with someone you're really interested in they may not take you seriously because they figure that you naturally flirt with everyone. I suggest keeping it more professional in the workplace. It's awkward to work with upset coworkers.

[Writhes]

A player because you were flirting? I don't know... does that make you a player? Were you actually going to date them both or are you already dating someone?

If you are single then I think that would obviously be a no. "Player" is just a an alternate term a scumbag uses define their infidelity aka cheating and faking emotional attachment.

If you are not a cheater then you are not a player. There is not rule against flirting with women but if you are with someone then you should respect their feelings.

[destroshyness]

I use to be just like you. Yea its not good.

[Asker]

How did you change for the better?

[destroshyness]

I saw it bro, I ask people they said its fine but maybe if a girl likes me wouldn't appreciate it. I think there was a girl who liked me, but she saw that I was a flirt. I just stopped, and if a girl was worthy for me to flirt with I will, what I mean if I like her I will flirt. I will just now talk to girl who I dont like casually like a a guy friend no touching. Touching can mean a lot to a person.

[Lacoste2301]

Dude I feel ya! Im in the same boat. I don't want a relationship just for the hell of it but yeah of course i flirt with a lot of girls. I wouldn't call it being a player because it's not like you are getting in her pants then leaving and getting in someone else's. So nah. Just do you man.

[kayooo]

In a way it is justified. Even though you may not be a player, the only thing people see is you flirting with multiple women. just watch your actions. i am a flirt too and have been accused of leading guys on. People dont realize thats just how i make conversation. It's the guys fault if he misinterprets the situation.

[naambb]

U like playing with a lot of girls and u don't want to be called a player.
What r u really trying to get out of that?

[Asker]

It's just harmless fun isn't it? I'm not intentionally leading any of these girls on, they know I'm messing around and don't mean it, so I don't see the problem.

Also even if I just talk to a girl people assume I'm trying to get with her and that's not true at all. I'm a nice guy with good intentions. I don't play women.

[naambb]

hmm how far is the gossip going is that serious? maybe they r just jealous then let them be
i wouldn't even mind being called a slut since i know im not

[AnimeDreama]

You don't deserve to be gossiped about, but if you don't want a reputation as a player then you should probably tone it down some.