Friends teasing me about a girl that I do secretly admire...

[adzz1]

basically I'm 20years old at uni and I've got really immature friends, well they could probably say the same about me lol. but anyways, one day I was talking to a mate about whose the fittest girl in our year, at the time I didn't like her but she is very pretty, she's got the looks of a model. I said she's the nicest in our year but at the time I meant that she is good looking and not that I like her...now ever since that day, he has told my other mates that I like her and they always tease me in lectures when she walks in or if she walks past. now I'm pretty sure she has heard them joking around and stuff when ever I'm there. but as time has gone on, I've realised I do actually like her but I'm really shy when it comes to girls. she's the shy type too but I'm sure she knows that I like her as she's heard my mates messing around. but the thing is, one time we were all waiting at the lifts and she walks through the doors but she sees us all there, instead of waiting for the lifts she decides to get the stairs! is this cause she feels intimidated by us or that she doesn't like me? this really freaked me out, I think she thinks I'm a wierdo and she doesn't want anything 2 do with me cause she just walked away wen she saw us.

now just to shut my friends up, I'm thinking of talking 2 her infront of them but making sure they don't hear anything and I want her number, but I'm scared she doesn't like me and will embarass me infront of every one. what shall I say to her? how can I ask her out, I was thinking something like:

"hi sammy you probably heard my m8s messing around that I like you this is not true, what I said was is that I think ur really pretty which is a compliment. just ignore them they act like kids, but I was thinking if ur free sometime this week we could go grab a coffee or something?"

does this sound cheesy? please help, is there anything extra I could do or say? I'm scared if she says no she's definitely gonna know that I like her and every time I see her its gonna be really awkward...and by me speaking to her it will shut my m8s up right?

[meplusabeemer]

I had to re-read this because the slang is different than what I am used to. To begin, don't listen to your friends because with all due respect they are highly immature. Who teases a guy about who he is interested in, I mean, I am sure you're not in high school anymore. Secondly, why would you "empower" your friends to dictate your happiness? If you like her and have an interest then go for it. At the end of the day, you are responsible for your own happiness so why surpass a potential opportunity because of a bunch of boys?

I cannot gauge if the girl is interested or not. I think she avoids you and the group because she is embarrassed and intimidated, especially if it's a daily thing. I think your idea of talking to her is a good idea BUT make sure you talk to her alone, away from your friends. Introduce yourself, ask her if she'd like to go and grab coffee or tea and say you'd like to talk to her. DEFINITELY tell her that you think she is attractive and you apologize for the behavior of your friends. Just say they like to act like clowns and to ignore their behavior. This should get the ball rolling.

Be prepared possibly that if you speak to her that it might cause your friends to be very rowdy and mocking. I would tell them to grow up, you're pursuing her and they can take it or leave it. Then, walk away and let them take it in.

Good luck.

[Anonymous]

Yes, if I were her I would be too intimidated to get in the lift as well! It would be too intimidating being in a confined space with a group of guys who are all nudging each other and whispering about you.

I would say go up and talk to her but not in front of your mates...I won't lie, she may or may not be interested. If she's a nice girl she'll put it in a nice way if she chooses to reject the offer and try not to embarrass you...but you may still feel embarrassed that your friends saw you being rejected.

Also, don't say "this is not true". It makes it more awkward when you beat about the bush trying to deny feelings for her. Instead, why don't you say something like "as you've probably heard, I think you're pretty and you seem like a nice girl...if you've got a bit of time this week do you reckon you'd like to grab a coffee with me or something?"

All you're saying is that you think she looks attractive and seems nice...you don't have to mention that you LIKE her. If she says no, just say something like "that's alright, well I guess I'll see you around then" and give her a nice smile, remain calm and take it in your stride...as long as you can do that if she rejects you, believe me you won't look like a loser, just a guy who was really brave and mature about it.

[milancutie]

"instead of waiting for the lifts she decides to get the stairs! is this cause she feels intimidated by us or that she doesn't like me? "

- it might just be that she did not feel like waiting, I do this all the time.

And if you tell her that "it is not true" that you like her that is not true because you do, and it would be weird if you said that and then asked her out. I think it would be good if you simply greeted her and such, maybe another day talk about class or something , maybe compliment her, and ask her out .

A lot of guys do tease their friends when they like someone, some girls do it too! Don't mind your friends, and don't worry about her knowing that you like her, because you do like her. And if she says no take it like a grain of salt.. and still be courteous , the best you can do is try.