Why does he feel he has to talk to so many other girls?

[Anonymous]

I am 9months pregnant and engaged to a wonderful guy, but there is this one problem. Since we first began dating he has these three "girl friends" that he always talks to. He has known them for several years now and I don't mind him talking to them I still occasionally talk to a few of my guy friends.

One of them is supposedly married but yet she called him last Friday night at 11:30pm. I don't know about you but I don't know many married women that call just a "friend" that late at night and that's not the first time she's called that late either. We've talked about them and he swears they are just friends but he seems different after they talk. He almost seems happier. And he won't ever talk to any of them around me he calls them when getting off work and then calls me if they don't answer to see if I'm getting off anytime soon or he'll call when I've left the house for a couple of hours. Ugh...I have no clue what any of this means or what to do about it. Knowing our daughter will be here in less than two weeks makes it worse. Can anyone tell me what they think?

[themastaplan]

hmmm this is interesting that he won't talk to them in front of you, that's a red flag in my eyes...if they are "just friends" he should be able to lay next to you, cuddling and have it so you both can hear...wouldnt you agree?

its just sketchy that when you leave or after work or whenever he calls them that you're just not there...i don't think that would sit well with anyone...how long does he talk tot hem for? about what? is the language appropriate?

he should respect you enough to be able to talk to them in front of you, this just doesn't make sense...now as far as teh 1130 thing goes, maybe she was having a rough night, maybe she needed guy support?

you have to understand its healthy to have opposite sex friends throughout life...but its not healthy for him to have to "hide" these conversations from you, its just wrong and doesn't sit well in my opinion...try asking him how he'd feel about you calling your male friends when not around him always and never when he's around...if he's like oh wahtever iw ouldnt care...then start doing it and see how he reacts to it...put him in your shoes, show him why its sketchy...but I think you both should sit down and have a talk...afterall your daughter is on teh way very soon

i hope this helps, don't get too worked up about this yet, it could be nothing, but its def something to talk about...good luck!

[thehand0]

Seems like you're concerned about the nature of his relationships with these women and what that means for your marriage. Perhaps you also feel neglected and hurt as he talks to them before he talks to you about things.

As for what to do, maybe have a chat about what you expect in a relationship/ marriage to be. Maybe it would be good to tell him that you expect communication and openness, about everything as that will also show he is trustworthy - and something like that goes a very long way in a relationship, especially marriage (to be).

[Anonymous]

ya I know what you mean. my boyfriend works night shifts and then he talks to his old girl friends (he used to have a thing with them) and I wouldn't mind at all as long as he could talk to them in front of me! he never has talked to any girl in front of me and so it makes me think he's talking to them about stuff he wouldn't want to talk about when I'm there. I would just tell your fiance you don't feel comfortable with him talking to them when your not there so much if he can't do it in front of you. that would really p*ss me off too if he called them before he called me. set your boundaries. that's really not okay for the late night calls. nothing should be that important to be calling that late and couldn't wait til the next day. also have you met these girls?

[lovehelp]

How long has he been gettting these late calls for? Since the beginning or just now? Has your relationship changed with your man since you became pregnant? Analyze your sex life- has it changed?

[Steeze]

Can't say this is the case with your boyfriend but I know I always liked talking to my friends who were girls when I was with my ex Stephanie. I loved her so much I wanted to always say and do the right things. The best way to learn is by talking to other women right? The fact you are pregnant just adds to the emotions. Once you have the kid I'm sure it will work out.

[Trihill]

he's cheating. think about it.

late night calling, everything's closed after 11pm, so what can a man and woman do then?
he's happy after talking with them, does he do that with you?
checking to see if you will leave the house, is he inviting them home for ***?
he calls them after work, and what time does he get home?
have you seen his phone record? (the more frequent, the greater chance something is going on)

[Phoenix52]

I wouldn't worry about it. We can have female friends.

I bet he wanted some guidance on how to be a good father.

[heatfan03]

u give yourself the answer in this question of course he's cheating, the better question is what are you gonna do about it.

[Anonymous]

Guys are most likely to cheat around this time...