If you keep going back and fighting for her, she will continuely push you away. I know she doesn't want to, but she will. It has become her way of asking for attention, or reassurance. Its not right, and she knows it, but she can't help it. The only person who can make a difference here is you. Stop showing her "good" results when she pushes you away.
I guess it is like training a pet. They learn to do certain things, when we praise/give them a treat after they do it. So they continuely do it to get a treat. I know its wrong to compare her to an animal. But I'm saying, just like animals, we know the results to certain actions. So when YOU give in to her actions, she knows the result to it, and will keep doing it.
We think that by reassuring, or running after the other person, we are pulling them closer to us, but we're really not. We're just, well--- running after them. They are still in the same place, ready to run any minute.
Testing is ok in the beginning of the relationship, but it gets tiring after awhile, and is really unfair to the other person. She has to learn to have more confidence, and security in relationships. If she can't get over the past, then she is NOT READY for a new relationship. She can use the past to guide her from time to time, but she can't let it control her future. She also has to realize that she can't torture you for the mistakes of others (in the past). We are all different.
Prove to her that you love her, and that you are trust worthy. Prove to her that you will not do anything to hurt her. Prove to her how much she means to you. If she still runs, then let her go. She has to learn that she can't keep doing this to ppl, especially people who care about her.
All you can do is, be there for her. If she runs, just stay, and wait for her to come back. Let her know that you aren't going anywhere. And that you are just one phone call away.
Dont give her the results she wants. Because it will just encourage her to keep doing it (running away that is)
Someday when she runs, she will look back and realize you are no longer running after her. And that is when she will realize she really has to change, and welcome the future with open arms, if she really wants to find happiness.
Im sorry if I'm being alil harsh.
P.S. I used to run.
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I'm sorry she's pushing you away.
You've probably been such a sweet heart to her, it must be something in her past.
Maybe lost a loved one, or a horrible unforgetable experiance.
The key is if you still have great feelings for her. Give her a little time and comfort her as much as possible. Every girl really loves a caring boyfriend.
Which I'm sure you are! :]
I wish you a lot of luck with your girlfriend and hopefully you will get back together! <3
just ask her "would you like it if someone said that to you" just tell her to put herself in other places and that might help
remind her that you are not that guy that hurt her. and just be your genunine kind self, hopefully she'll come around:)
For one thing, stop chasing her. That in of itself will shore up your foundation a bit and break her from the paradigm she's used to. Better yet, get more women in your life so she can see you've got something going for yourself and aren't a needy wuss. Those two things combined will go a lot way towards sparking her attraction to you. That's what's missing here I think.
Yes, she may still care, but she could also not be attracted anymore due to a variety of reasons. Get that back and see where things go from there. In any event you'll be much better off in the long run when you have choice over who you date and are in the driver's seat for a change.
I recall a scene from a movie.
She stars yelling, pushing you away, but she admits she loves you and she doesn't want to push you away, but she can't help it.
And you grab her and hold her head to your chest and say "shh it's going to be okay"
shut up, I'm a romantic. Lol!
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She don't wanna be saved don't save her
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