What is flirting?

[Monalisa77]

I dont know if these makes sense. I've read lots of mytakes and articles on how to flirt but not one where it actually says what it is. Does flirting show a sign of chemistry between two people, how long should flirting last before you make a move/ask the person out? If the other person doesn't respond should you drop it or try a different tactic?

I reckon my only way of getting a boyfriend is being a bloody good flirt.

Playing games between two people

Testing the other person

A bit of fun

Nothing really, people just flirt

[pink_blah]

Flirting could be a lot of things, like compliments, teasing, eye contact, laughing at their jokes or making them laugh, physical contact. its not just one specific thing, its a bunch of things

[Monalisa77]

Yeah thats not what im asking, in a whole i mean what does it actually mean. What are we getting out of it, how much is expected etc

[pink_blah]

ohh my bad, some people just flirt for fun but i think most people just do it to build a connection so it could lead to a relationship

[Jdjfjcjj]

Lets just make this real simple... Do you flirt with ugly people? No. Just the attractive ones. So no, it's not innocent.

[Monalisa77]

i flirt with people im attracted to yes cos thats natural. but there r plenty of men people find attractive that i just dont.

[Jdjfjcjj]

Yea... I never said you expected to find the same guy attractive that every other women for too. Thanks for confirming my point thought with the first sentence. 🍉

[Monalisa77]

i still wouldn't call anyone ugly. its just a horrible thing to call someone and does no good for their self esteem

[Jdjfjcjj]

I didn't call anyone ugly, I asked do you flirt with a [hypothetical] ugly person? If you're subconscious immediately thought of someone, say like Carrot Top, or someone that hits closer home, that's on you sista.

[Monalisa77]

well i only flirt because i want someone to like me, if i flirted with someonee i didn't like that would just be leading them on.

[Jdjfjcjj]

I think youve certainly found a way to achieve my original point without using the word ugly.

I like that

[Monalisa77]

also, im pretty insecure myself, so ii would only start to flirt if i feel the other person has any slight interest in me. so even if i may not be attracted to them at first, there's always a possibility it could grow.

[Monalisa77]

but attraction to me isn't always about how someone looks. its about how they carry themselves and how they treat you and other people. a guy could be very good looking but have a jerkish personality

[Jdjfjcjj]

Women would do much better for themselves just displaying a sense of innocence, and/or embarrassment like this:

If you just offer a cute smile, he smiles back, and then you ook down showing you a little nervous, but keep the smile while looking down still, you come across, as the cute, less promiscuous woman I've got to make an introduction too. Even if my assumption could be furthest from the truth, you playing the innocent girl, big +++.

[Jdjfjcjj]

I don't want the experienced girl who looks me in the eye with nio feeling of embarrassment or anything. She basically saying I don't mean shit

[Monalisa77]

yeah i did that with my last/current crush, he started smiling at me so i smiled back a bit shyly, he mustve liked it to keep it going. but I've never had a boyfriend be4 so i am generally innocent

[Jdjfjcjj]

Yea but if he isn't making a move to start talking to you, but he smiled back, he likely support insecure himself

[Jdjfjcjj]

Supper*
Most guys fear going up to women they like. They overthink what they should say, etc. You playing the innocent card should help most guys get the confidence. Guess not him

[Monalisa77]

it was a work scenario, we had already spent one night talking all night and we'd bonded. but i think i ended up pushing him away/half rejecting him

[pink_blah]

@Jdjfjcjj yea i do tbh. Beauty is subjective in most cases unless the person is conventionally attractive. I was flirting with “everyone” whether theyre “ugly” or not tbh 😭

[DermalPunch]

Ooooh. It is a b and c. Cool question. I didn't vote.

[Monalisa77]

Do we test the person to see if theyre interested and compatible?

[DermalPunch]

Flirting is such a complex interaction. There are also different styles of flirting. I would say men use it as a tool to test compatibility far more than women.

[Nikki1989]

Depends on if it is natural or if it is forced. I am a natural flirt, so I do it without even realising it

[strateguy632]

3rd.

[Jamie05rhs]

Good question lol.