What do people consider flirting?

[Anonymous]

Is being nice to someone considered flirting now?

[hahahmm]

Focused attention that shows you have sexual interest. That doesn't mean it has to be explicit but it is clear that you want something intimate.

Obviously the perception of the other person matters too.

There's a grey area too.. where something could be said and it's borderline and all about how the other person wants to take it. I guess it's like making soup. Just because you sprinkle some spices in a pot doesn't mean you're making soup. But you start adding more and more ingredients and next thing you know you got soup. So it's not just 1 thing but a bunch of things in combination. If you said to a woman, "that dress looks nice on you" it's not automatically flirting. You do it while making your eyes linger a long time staring into her eyes or when you already have a history of VERY friendly comments you don't give everybody else she knows & it means something else.

I remember when I was 20s giving a female co-worker massages and she taught me some massages. We never explicitly said anything but yeah we were flirting a lot. Ha.

The flip side of that is I've known women who were friendly to every guy the same. Very friendly but we all knew that was their style so it's not taken as flirting. Even tho it was still very attractive.

[7Phoenix7]

This

[LonelyHsoul]

Being nice isn't considered flirting but I can see why some do come to that conclusion, especially if it's someone they like and if they are joking around and laughing but even these days some lonely people consider the slightest bit of attention flirting.

Flirting in general is hard to understand unless you are being quite obvious about your intentions without saying it like eye contact and physical contact during your interactions then but some people just think you want something from them in a none dating or sexual nature so it's hard to know if the intentions are for real.

[Asker]

Interesting 🤔

[PBandJ_Nerd]

If you're just being nice, then no, that's not flirting. But what I consider flirting isn't what a neurotypical person would consider flirting, so I can't give much of an answer. But I usually won't know whether someone is flirting or not, so they do have to tell me that.

[12karen]

When you give someone a bit too much attention and compliment

Example "I want you to know something, but I'm kinda scared to just say it, so I'll just let the first three words of this sentence say it for me" if it becomes something like that you know it's flirt

[Asker]

I'll keep that in mind 🤔

[12karen]

What do you consider flirting

[Asker]

Anything thats clear that the purpose of it is to flirt

[EdTheMan3]

That's confusing

[serious]

That is a good question. However, the answer to your question is No.

Being nice and flirting are entirely different. The major difference being the motive, the intent and the expectation of final outcome.

If a person is being nice then it is their nature and they do it defines who they are and they are the same with everyone. A nice person is not expecting any outcome, has no purpose or behind their niceness.

However, flirting on the other hand is a purposeful act done with the intention of making the other person like them or show interest in them.

[Maybe_Maybe_not]

I can see hypothetical and psychological examples where showing interest will be seen as flirting. When showing interest to people who are not used to receive interest, then it raises a signal for them, the wrong one. The same for those who have been mistreated, same signal, same possibility for wrong interpretation

[Zack-Bann]

I have no clue anymore.
Whatever I usually say or do so long as I have a smile on my face women think Im flirting for some reason.


I once tested to see how far I can push it and say the most random things but as long as the delivery says “flirting” that’s what they’ll hear

[electromagnetic]

I wouldn’t say being nice is flirting. I think flirting has that eyelash batting with gentle touching and what not. Or and some side comments. If that even makes sense.

[Asker]

I think I get what you mean but not really

[LiliTyaka]

Being nice no but i think its often obvious when you flirt with someone saying some small things here and there re-state//background_color_rgba (0, 0, 0, 0), font_color_rgb (77, 77, 77), justifyLeft

[Asker]

Yea that's definitely true but some people think anything is flirting lol

[LiliTyaka]

Yes they do which is...

[Asker]

Pretty wack

[Account]

I have no idea, but it certainly isn't what the anonymous person said. If that is the case then every single interaction would be considered flirting.

[Asker]

Exactly, it was funny tho, it's a funny thing to say, maybe the anon does believe that tho, cause she stayed quiet, she doesn't wanna flirt it seems 😂

[DryGermanGuy]

There isn't exactly a set rulebook. I know I have to switch to flirting from just being friendly.

[Asker]

That's a good point but it seems people have different opinions on it

[Amii_Hex]

Yesterday at school this guy in my class sat down in the same class as me, just because he is in the same class as me. I can't believe he was flirting with me like that its crazy

[Asker]

Then I assume y'all are going on a date pretty soon right 😂

[Amii_Hex]

Gotta happen i guess. Like he even ate lunch in the SAME caffeteria as me during lunch break i mean thats just too much flirting to turn down

[Asker]

Well hopefully it happens, best of luck with it all lol

[Amii_Hex]

Haha nah i was just joking, i dont actually like any guy from my class. I do have a bit of a crush on one of my brothers friends because he is like... like if a statue maker chiseled him out of marble, but thats likely not happening because he absolutely hates me for a reason that i can't really control

[Asker]

Lmao the statue comparison was pretty funny I'll admit but why does he hate you? 😂

[Amii_Hex]

well i actually asked about this in a question, but long story short, my brother is like, very close to me. Like he is super nice to me all the time and he wants to hang out with me and spend time with me all the time, which is nice, little confusing, but nice. The thing is he will often prioritize me above even his friends and they hate me for that because they say i ruin their plans sometimes :( Like for example today i came home from my training and my brother was playing that tarkov game with his friends, and as soon as i came home he just instantly went like sorry guys gotta go and just go to me to greet me and ask me if i wanna do something. so yeah his friends hate me because of that

[Asker]

That is a bit odd but I guess it's refreshing to see siblings get along or at the least see a brother care for his sister as many like to be annoying to them, although that explains it for sure so they not know you are the one purposely preventing them from hanging out tho, it seems just your appearance is enough, it's possible he just needs an excuse to leave lol

[Amii_Hex]

I dunno, it doesn't make me feel happy that they hate me for kinda just existing. Im just saying all my other friends who have brothers they always argue and mine just wants to hangout with me all the time. You can read the question i wrote about and read the comments etc if you want more detail about it if its interesting you, but yeah its not something i control or do on purpose but his friends hate me for it and are often mean when he is not around cuz he would tell them off if they were mean to me in front of him

[Asker]

Its strange but if you hang out with him so much, why not bring it up, you just let these people hate you, it's kinda funny but messed up lol

Also mentioning you don't want to cause issues with him and his friends but so he's aware, or you can try getting a long with his friends, next time you see he's about to ditch his friends recommend tagging them along as well, then they will see you aren't the friend snatching diva they possibly think you are, just an option of course

[Amii_Hex]

Maybe i really doubt his friends would wanna hangout with me cuz... i mean i dont have much in common with them. They are 16-18 year old guys and they dont really do stuff that is all that interesting to me and im guessing my stuff isn't much of interest to them either

And also its just that my brother is so nice to me and does so much stuff for me and i dont wanna be a dick and just go like hey by the way your friends hate me you gotta chose them or me or something like that

[Asker]

Yea don't do that, I guess if they are older then it makes sense the not wanting to involve yourself in any way, I guess they will just have to keep hating you since there's really no solution, it could've been worse tho, you at least have a brother that will defend you most likely physically as well so that's good too

[Amii_Hex]

Yeah my brother would probably do anything id ask him to do but im not gonna demand that he forces his friends to like me that would just be a dick move. Still tho it would be real nice if they understood im not dragging him away from them and its just his choice to hangout with me instead because like i swear if Uwe asked me out on a date id say yes before he finishes the sentence but not happening since they hate me :(

[Asker]

That's why I think you should find a solution maybe something can happen although I would imagine age can play a part in it, if he's too old then maybe not but you won't ever find out if you don't try, you should find a solution, or at the least try so then everyone is happy

[Amii_Hex]

Well he isn't much older than me i think uwe is like 17 or so i dont actually know i have no clue when his birthday is but i tried like soft flirting with him before when i was 14 but he always kinda just ignored me or just seemed annoyed :(

[Asker]

Was that before he started hating you or after? 🤔

[Miah06]

Yup. Because I'm nice to people all the time. And everyone thinks I'm flirting.

I just literally like sparking convos with randos. It's how you know more about people and different opinions and ways of life, and culture

[Asker]

Yep that's true, now stop flirting geez 😌

[Miah06]

Not agaib😭😭😭

[Asker]

😂😂

[Ferngully2000]

Flirting can range from giving prolonged eye contact, smiling and joking around but in a fun and teasing (light hearted) way.

[Asker]

I see, I didn't know that, so teasing people is flirting 🤯

[Ferngully2000]

Yes but not in a offensive way, more like jokey with it, the other person knows it’s a bit of fun.

[Asker]

So it counts as flirting? Even if it's a friendly? 🤔

[Ferngully2000]

Yes it does, especially if someone is giving you the eyes.

[Asker]

👀👀👀👀

[dragoblack]

Making an actual effort in getting to know eachother as people

[Asker]

Thats facts

[ihateTaylorSwift]

being extra obvious
while touching or smiling a lot more than necessary

[NicholasRedone]

If only men kept themselves to themselves, am i right Cynthia 🎎🪆

[Anonymous]

Well, I don't know how to flirt, but I know how to be nice.

[Asker]

Fair enough 😂

[Opinion Owner]

🤣🤣🤣

[Anonymous]

If someone of the opposite gender comments on my looks a lot.

[Babygirl_S]

I smile at the men I flirt with.

[Asker]

Do you not smile much?

[Justneedtokno]

You know I have no unearthly idea what flirting is anymore I’m so out of the loop. I’ll be thinking people that are just kind is flirting.

[Godihateyou]

Being nice while attractive = flirting
Being nice while ugly =creepy

[SleepingHazard]

For the love of God, I wouldn't even know myself.

[Asker]

Felt that, just passes over like air

[PrettyCrumblBb]

Bro this question is considered flirting

[Asker]

What how? 😂

[PrettyCrumblBb]

I was just minding my own business and this question came at me like 👁️🫦👁️

[Asker]

Why are you capping, if anything that's how you saw the question, we both know the one that looks around like that is you 😂

[PrettyCrumblBb]

please I'm innocent 🙄

[Asker]

Lies lol

[Anonymous]

In my experience if i ridicule women they think I'm flirting.

[Jennz6]

Excessive eye contact and smiling

[NicholasRedone]

Replaces excessive with intense 🥹

[BigTex53]

It’s being nice and playful.

[NicholasRedone]

Cab I have your number 😋😋😋😈

[NicholasRedone]

In reference to the nervous 🫦 can not cab lol 😆 🚕🚖

[blackeagle007]

It’s by not talking to them