How does he feel about me?

[Anonymous]

My brother has a friend who lives in a different city. I first met him 3 years ago and I was in love with him at first sight. This guy asked me for my insta, and I've encountered him 3 more times. Last year he came to my city and my brother told him he can stay at our house with our parents. That time the guy asked me if I'm in love with anybody and one night we went out with him and my brother and when he saw me with make up and beautiful clothes his pupils dilated and he immediately looked down. My mom also noticed at the table where he was seated opposite to me that he was blushing.

I have not seen him in a year and we do not text but he always likes my posts. Yesterday it was Easter and I decided to find the courage and text him. I sent him one cute nice message asking him if he is fine and wishing him health and happiness. I texted him late at night and he replied to me at 5am. Why did he text me at this time? I know from my brother that he's not active at social media and he studies a lot and has a strange sleeping schedule. I was also surprised cause he replied to me with eight messages in a row asking me how I am doing and telling me he's okay and he has found a new internship and he also heard some news about me. He even joked about my name and asked me about my nickname.

I texted him later this morning but as I said he's not this active so it's been hours he hasn't replied yet.

Do you think he is romantically attracted to me and if yes, do you think based on his behavior he would accept to do ldr. Please note I'm kinda in a difficult situation cause he's my brother's friend altho my brother approves and the guy once was in an affair with his older brother's female friend.

[serious]

Okay, so I will reply in parts:

1. "My brother has a friend who lives in a different city. I first met him 3 years ago and I was in love with him at first sight. This guy asked me for my insta, and I've encountered him 3 more times."

I suppose this means you met him 3 times over the last 3 years. Right?

2. "Last year he came to my city and my brother told him he can stay at our house with our parents. That time the guy asked me if I'm in love with anybody and one night we went out with him and my brother and when he saw me with make up and beautiful clothes his pupils dilated and he immediately looked down. My mom also noticed at the table where he was seated opposite to me that he was blushing."

That is a good sign. That is a clear sign of attraction towards you

3."I have not seen him in a year and we do not text but he always likes my posts. Yesterday it was Easter and I decided to find the courage and text him. I sent him one cute nice message asking him if he is fine and wishing him health and happiness."

Okay, so I just don't understand one thing. If he was clearly attracted to you and you liked him then why did you not take things forward last year itself? Or were you waiting for him to make a move?

I don't know maybe he is of the shy type and a typically shy guy won't make the first move, instead he waits for the woman to make the move. It could be the same with him.

4. "I texted him late at night and he replied to me at 5am. Why did he text me at this time? I know from my brother that he's not active at social media and he studies a lot and has a strange sleeping schedule. I was also surprised cause he replied to me with eight messages in a row asking me how I am doing and telling me he's okay and he has found a new internship and he also heard some news about me. He even joked about my name and asked me about my nickname."

That is another good sign, it means he remembers you and still thinks of you despite you both having never dated, or at least that what I understood from your question subject.

5."I texted him later this morning but as I said he's not this active so it's been hours he hasn't replied yet."

I am sure the reply will come sooner or later. He must be occupied with something.

6."Do you think he is romantically attracted to me and if yes, do you think based on his behavior he would accept to do ldr."

In my view, yes there is every possibility of him being romantically attracted to you. However, I am not sure if he will accept being in a LDR or not.

7."Please note I'm kinda in a difficult situation cause he's my brother's friend altho my brother approves and the guy once was in an affair with his older brother's female friend."

Well, the good thing is your brother approves this and is happy for you. It also does not matter if the guy in question has had an affair in the past or not. However, give that it has been 1 year since so the most important thing you need to be sure of is whether he is still single or not? If he is in an exclusive relationship or is currently having any affair then he should not longer be an option for you to pursue.

This answers your questions.

[Asker]

First of all thank you for being the only serious one in this comment section. So lemme share some important information with you:
He has been single for 2 years, he's now alone and he told my brother recently he wants sm a girlfriend. However, he is the type who is very serious and selective and a nerdy guy who mostly associates with his engineering studies and doesn't have much personal time.
I didn't make the first move last year cause I was planning a trip to his city soon after his stay in our house and at that time he had actually told me I could even stay at his place if I wanted. As I was awkward in my city cause it felt very uncomfortable to flirt in front of my parents, I had decided I'd make the first move when I'd visit his city. Sadly for a serious reason I had to cancel the trip and this is how our communication ended abruptly. He also didn't make a first move to show explicitly his interest cause during his stay I ended up being avoidant and would get shut in my room cause I was feeling very flustered, it's mostly my fault, it was clear he enjoyed my presence.
Also I haven't told my brother I like the guy cause I'm scared, my brother is chill and at that time he had actually asked me if I feel anything for the guy but I was actually emotionally unavailable and scared to tell him the truth.
I also referred to his past relationship to show that he has no problem finding a girlfriend who is related to a family member or friend. I also know he never had a serious affair in his life.
My plan is to contact him but without any pressure and see his reaction. I would like to say that the most important thing is my gut-feeling and I feel a weird connection and reassurance, I even saw many signs when I was wondering whether I should reach out.
Thanks a lot!

[serious]

Thank you for sharing. I will reply soon.

[serious]

1. “First of all thank you for being the only serious one in this comment section. So lemme share some important information with you”

No problem and yes I am always serious and straightforward

2. “He has been single for 2 years, he's now alone and he told my brother recently he wants sm a girlfriend. However, he is the type who is very serious and selective and a nerdy guy who mostly associates with his engineering studies and doesn't have much personal time.”

Okay so the good thing here is he is still single. As for his nature of him being selective and nerdy it is fine. He is one of those guys who have standards. Maybe he has standards for the type of girl he wants, could be both personality wise and physical standards. That is fine. Women have standards and men have standards so this is all subjective. Yes, I am aware that women/girls like men who have a good sense of humor, men who can make a woman laugh, smile etc. However, there are men who cannot do all this but yet they have good qualities and treat a woman well. I am also a very serious person and seriousness of a person has no relation they treat a woman.
What you can do maybe is to take this forward and go on date with him, see how the compatibility between both of you and then you can decide. Now as for him not having much personal time, you need to be very careful on this one.
The reason I am saying this is because he could be a workaholic or a person who is really busy and likes to be occupied, so in future if you get into an exclusive relationship with him he won’t have time for himself and so then how will you expect him to make time for you? Right?
. Otherwise you have to make up your mind that he will be a workaholic and so won’t make time for you and you should be completely fine with that. If you are a woman who can easily make time for him so you have every right to expect the same from him and if he cannot do that then what is th e point right? Think about this point very deeply

cont...

[serious]

3. “I didn't make the first move last year cause I was planning a trip to his city soon after his stay in our house and at that time he had actually told me I could even stay at his place if I wanted. As I was awkward in my city cause it felt very uncomfortable to flirt in front of my parents, I had decided I'd make the first move when I'd visit his city. Sadly for a serious reason I had to cancel the trip and this is how our communication ended abruptly. He also didn't make a first move to show explicitly his interest cause during his stay I ended up being avoidant and would get shut in my room cause I was feeling very flustered, it's mostly my fault, it was clear he enjoyed my presence”

Well, sad that communication between you and him ended abruptly. I don’t want to give any dialogues from a Hollywood movie or tell you some quotes but even logically speaking it is indeed true that life is short and at times you have create your opportunities and try to do what you want rather than just waiting for the right time to come. If things are simply left to fate and time then you never know when the right time will come as future is always uncertain,

I know what I am saying is easier said than done. Anyways, the point is if you really think this person can be the one or you think the way you feel with this person is unmatched then either you or him should try and make the extra effort.

.
cont...

[serious]

4. “Also I haven't told my brother I like the guy cause I'm scared, my brother is chill and at that time he had actually asked me if I feel anything for the guy but I was actually emotionally unavailable and scared to tell him the truth.”

Okay so he knows that now and is cool with it. He has approved it so at least now you can relax

5. “I also referred to his past relationship to show that he has no problem finding a girlfriend who is related to a family member or friend. I also know he never had a serious affair in his life.”

That’s great. It seems you know him really well.

6. “My plan is to contact him but without any pressure and see his reaction. I would like to say that the most important thing is my gut-feeling and I feel a weird connection and reassurance, I even saw many signs when I was wondering whether I should reach out.”

Yes so you should reach out to him and just do your best. Don’t expect and don’t predict what his reaction will be. Just do what you think is correct.

[Asker]

Thank you so much, everything you said fully describes the situation

[serious]

No problem. You are welcome

[slatyb]

Why are you asking us? Ask him. Invite him to visit.

[Anonymous]

So you want us to figure out how a guy feels about you that we don’t know?

Right…

[Babebytheshore85]

He doesn't like you lol.

[In_Trance]

Why haven't you just asked him?