Wtf was this about? Is he just not interested?

[Anonymous]

I met John volunteering. John and his friend were joking and flirting around with me and having silly banter (it’s safe to say he and his friend both may like me). John’s friend even told me I have “main character energy” and he’d be my “do boy” (smh). John asked for my IG, I rarely use it so he took my number instead.

Anyways, John asked when we get back home, would I go on a date with him. I asked him preliminary questions about where he lived, etc and later told him yes. He mentioned he was looking to date and I overheard him tell someone else he was looking for a wife (whatever that means).

In person he teases me (sticks his finger in my ear, grab my waist, poking me and other annoyances). Some of our texts include him asking if I’d be interested in him, telling me I look good and me thanking him and saying we can see where it would go as friends. I asked him one night (in person) what did he want and he said to get to know me.

The last day we saw each other I responded to his text that morning and he did not respond. I saw him later that day (same in person interactions) but no text or anything after we all left to go home. I texted him Monday (says delivered) and still have not received a text back. It’s Wednesday…

I guess my question is was he ever really interested?

[Summeroflove]

Talk to him maybe there is fading interest or something happened.

[Asker]

I should text him again?

[Summeroflove]

Yeah ask him the same thing you’re asking here too and see where you stand

[Asker]

I sent something earlier, still no response but delivered

[Summeroflove]

Asker if someone won’t reply. It’s time to cut your losses and not waste time

[Oliverlogan263]

Damn, that's a weird situation with this John dude. It sounds like he was definitely flirting with you and putting out signals that he was interested, but then he just completely ghosted you after that last day. That's messed up.

Honestly, it's hard to say for sure if he was ever really that interested to begin with. The constant physical touching and teasing could just be his way of flirting, but it doesn't necessarily mean he was serious about wanting to date you. Especially since he didn't even bother to respond to your text a few days later.

My guess is that maybe he got a little carried away with the flirting and attention, but when it came time to actually follow through and make plans, he got cold feet or lost interest. Dudes can be like that sometimes, you know? They get all hyped up in the moment, but then when it's time to put in real effort, they bounce.

It's wack that he just disappeared like that without any explanation. That's not cool at all. If he was genuinely interested, the respectful thing would have been to at least let you know he's not feeling it anymore instead of just ghosting.

My advice would be to let this one go. Don't waste your time chasing after a dude who can't even be upfront with you. You deserve way better than that. Focus your energy on people who are gonna appreciate you and show up consistently. This John guy clearly ain't it.

Better to find out sooner rather than later that he's not worth your time, you feel me? Shake it off, sis. There are plenty of other fish in the sea who will treat you right. This was just one fuckboy you had to weed out.

[Asker]

Thank you. I will take this advice.

[Oliverlogan263]

You got this, girl! I'm glad I could help provide some clarity on that confusing situation with John. It's never easy when a guy leaves you hanging like that, but you're absolutely right to just move on.

You deserve way better than some dude who can't even be bothered to text you back. Screw him - his loss! You keep doing you, focus on yourself, and the right guy who's truly interested in you will come along when the time is right.

In the meantime, don't let this get you down. Spend time with your girls, treat yourself, and remember that you're a total catch. Any guy would be lucky to have you. Just keep that head held high, and don't waste another minute on John or anyone else who can't appreciate how amazing you are. You got this, sis!