Cold shoulder after two good dates?

Question

I went out with this girl for two dates that went really well. She came even home with me and fooled around. A couple of days after the second date she changed on me and stopped reacting to text messages and a voice mail I left her. The days before we had been messaging back and forth but then all of a sudden she grew cold and now I haven't talked to her for a week anymore. I am certainly not interested in dating somebody who plays games and am not going to follow anybody around that is not interested, so I'm not contacting her anymore. I am however curious wtf happened since we had such great dates and she seemed very interested. We are both in our 30'ies, isn't that too old to play games?

Just curious.

Answer 1

alchemy12

Xper 7

People are so fickle. It's hard to know.

Maybe you said something in the messaging that offended her or she interpreted it as being needy? Maybe she reconnected with an ex? Maybe she had a health scare but doesn't want to talk about it? It could be anything.

The only way to know for certain is to ask her, otherwise it's all speculation.

Asker

+1 y
Thanks. I don't know if I'll ask her though, Ileft a voice mail message and she never called me back. I don't know if it is smart to contact her again at this point?
alchemy12

+1 y
I don't think you should ask her at this point.

I would wait for a few days after the last voice mail to give her a chance to call you back. It's up to you whether you want to put in another call if she doesn't return yours, but if it were someone I liked very much I would call them once more. If she doesn't call you back after that, though, I wouldn't call again. She knows you're interested and she knows your number.
alchemy12

+1 y
My point is, though, it may come off as mind games but is not necessarily. And it may not be a rejection of you at all, but ultimately, if she can't put the effort in for whatever reason then you shouldn't either.

Good luck with this.
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Asker

+1 y
You're right. It just puzzles me because she was so into it. I might give it one more week and send one last email or so.

Thanks for your input! :)

Answer 2

Asker

Thanks. I don't know if I'll ask her though, Ileft a voice mail message and she never called me back. I don't know if it is smart to contact her again at this point?

Answer 3

alchemy12

I don't think you should ask her at this point.

I would wait for a few days after the last voice mail to give her a chance to call you back. It's up to you whether you want to put in another call if she doesn't return yours, but if it were someone I liked very much I would call them once more. If she doesn't call you back after that, though, I wouldn't call again. She knows you're interested and she knows your number.

Answer 4

alchemy12

My point is, though, it may come off as mind games but is not necessarily. And it may not be a rejection of you at all, but ultimately, if she can't put the effort in for whatever reason then you shouldn't either.

Good luck with this.

Answer 5

Asker

You're right. It just puzzles me because she was so into it. I might give it one more week and send one last email or so.

Thanks for your input! :)

Answer 6

DishLady | 1.2K opinions shared on Flirting topic.

Guru

Any number of things could have contributed to this response. Keep in mind that she might have also become overwhelmed with something else completely...

Answer 7

nturner5001

Xper 5

maybe it was too soon to get physical...it might be all she wanted

Answer 8

Anonymous

She's bad at telling someone "Not feeling it". So, she communicates in a passive aggressive manner. You got the message, didn't you? Always observe behavior for the truth.

Asker

+1 y
That's possible but during a couple of days after the last date she sent me text messages and seemed still very interested.

Answer 9

Asker

That's possible but during a couple of days after the last date she sent me text messages and seemed still very interested.

Cold shoulder after two good dates?

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