Guys- my arms are getting touched...why?

[Anonymous]

I have a few guy "friends" and they all like to touch my arm during conversation. Is this a clear sign that these guys like me? They are my good guy friends and I am unsure why they do this.

[Anonymous]

Physical contact with the arm is typically a part of flirting. It is testing the waters by one person to see if being in the others' personal space feels right. The arm is probably the least offensive place on the body to touch.

Physical contact is a pivotal moment in getting to know one another. Before this point of touch, a boy and a girl try to decide if they like each other: Do I find her cute? Does he like the same kind of music I do? Does she feel genuine? Do I like his snarky humor? Afterward, assuming both are okay with the contact, they start to consider how much they like each other: Is he fun when hanging out? Will she play tennis with me? Can I trust him with my secrets? Do I want to make out with her? Should I ask him to go steady? Should I move with her to Hawaii?

When the touch happens, it is usually brief and may seem accidental or incidental. If the touchee flinches or retreats, this means "not going there" (or "Aaugh! Cooties!") or at least "not ready yet." If the touchee doesn't retreat, this means the contact is welcome, or at least tolerable.

In past eras, it would be the boy's role to initiate conversation, and then the girl would, when she felt ready, make that first touch. Nowadays, gender roles are more fluid, so either person can initiate conversation or make the touch.

Regarding the incident that sparked this question, it is most likely the boy was being a tad forward. The proper (contemporary‡) response to this is to let him know you don't want to be touched (yet), and then he should respect your personal space. Or, if you do want him in your space, don't back away, let him hang, and see where things go.

[Asker]

wow...did you write a ph.d dissertation on this?!

[Opinion Owner]

they call me dr. copy and paste: link

lol

[Anonymous]

i do this to males and females during convos. it's a sign of dominance (touch forearms/wrists).

[Anonymous]

Some people just naturally like to touch others during conversation as a sign of sincerity... I know some guys like to rub their leg against mine at the bar which clearly is a sign of interest.

[Vivaldi]

I want to touch your arms.

[anony84]

Personally I do this to both guys and girls and usually don't even realize I'm doing it. Some people are just naturally touchy feely and it doesn't necessarily have to mean anything.

[Hyrule]

They like you. ^^