Women: Turn The Jealousy Into An Inspiration

[Anonymous]

At some point in our lives, we’ve all been there. We compare ourselves to each other from height, size, accomplishment and started to question ourselves like "how did she get so far ahead?" Or "Why her life is so much easier than me?"

So why do we women compare ourselves? Is it because of insecurity? Lack of confidence? Jealousy?

With the age of social media and when everyone is having an “online” presence and in some cases the validation of self through “Likes” and the number of friends, we all in some way or another compare ourselves to each other. It has now gone beyond the hair, size, height, clothes etc. It really needs to stop. I’m not saying don’t look at/to each other. We should. Totally. But we can do it in a healthy way. I've heard people say that women are biologically wired to be competitive against each other especially when it comes to look. I disagree. Why? Because I am a woman who always admire the beauty of other women. This is what I mean here. Comparing but in a healthy way. I'll check her out but not to compete,perhaps to ask her some tips and the secret of her beauty. This doesn't apply only to her look. If I ever found other women to be so successful, I'd never hesitate to figure out what does it take for her to reach to that point.

JEALOUSY ISN'T A FEMALE TRAIT. JEALOUSY IS AN INSECURITY TRAIT. INSECURITY DOESN'T DISCRIMINATE

Sometimes, I envy the opposite gender for being so much supportive towards each other. Of course men can be competitive as well but in different areas and most of the time,they don't get jealous over a silly reason like women do. There's always an exception to the rule but I am talking about the majority

Move from comparison envy to a place of inspiration

1. Figure out your feeling

Ask yourselves why do you feel this way? Is it really because of them? Are you sure you're working hard enough to improve your life? Or maybe you're too busy with others' lives and it affects your self-development. While you're suffering thinking of her, she's busy working out in the gym or attending some important meetings.

2. Acknowledge that you're unique with your own special gift

Your journey is unique,so is the other women you're comparing yourself to. Yes she may seem awesome, but guess what so are you!! <3

3. Love yourself

It is easier to be inspired by others when we have love for ourselves. We give what we have. So learn to love you so that you can pass on that love to someone else!! Learn to love yourself like how they love themselves.

4. Give yourself a break

Free yourself from anything that brings you down. If you need to go for a vacation,take a break and pamper yourself. Clear every negative perspectives around you. Once you feel that you've gained back the strength, then you can start to have a proper plan for your life. Make them as your inspiration to move on ahead.

5. Stop focusing only on the positive side of them

Do you even know what are they going through in their life? Are you with them all the time? No. They might look happy,enjoying their weekend with family and friends but who knows? Don't get shocked when you found out that one of them just got dumped by her husband!!! The grass is always greener on the other side. We all go through some hardships in our lives. If they can take the pain,why can't you?

So if you are in a state of comparison envy, use the points noted above to move from a place of envy to a place of inspiration. The more you help others, the better it will serve you. Knowing that you deserve a life filled with love & happiness, don’t allow comparison envy to steal your joy:)

[redeyemindtricks]

Yah, I think you are in the right head space here.

But -- before we can even do this -- step #1 is to conquer that even more annoying trait, namely, letting jealously expand into totally random unrelated areas once we start feeling it.

Y'all know what I'm talking about... Once we decide that some other woman is worth being The Object Of Envy for the moment -- then, ANYTHING she's doing becomes fair game for that uniquely womanly feeling of spite. right? I mean, in a worst case scenario, we end up with our heads swimming with positively ridiculous shit, like, "Look at that bitch... just sippin' on that Diet Coke, like she owns the place." LMAO YOU KNOW IT'S TRUE.

I mean, the same thing goes in the other direction, too -- when I've got my #wcw for the week, then, EVERYTHING she does is just so consummately awesome <3

But... yeah. Step #1 is to try to undo THAT, first. That's not always easy lol

[doodlecake]

Yup when something gets you down give it the good old:
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[lolatyou]

Good advice but I feel like jealously is definitely more of associated with females when it comes to appearances, for a number of reasons. We're valued more for our appearance, we're pressured more for our appearances as well, idolized more because of it. Men are also attracted to all types of women, it seems like they're more open to options, which is a good thing but also it's bound to cause insecurity and competition among women.

It just feels like some women need to realize what they're fighting over a lot of the time. It seems like most of the time, they just want the attention of men that they don't even want and are willing to compete for it.

And you're right, we should take a step back and look at ourselves and the reasons for it because most of the time it's not even worth the stress.

[myTake Owner]

Yes! I feel like women are soooo much competitive when it comes to look. It is like it's okay for her to be success as long as I am prettier. Tbh I think accomplishment is much more important but like you mention we are judged based on our look while men are more on their accomplishment.

[SunsetRose]

As women, we have to stop competing with each other and start empowering each other

[myTake Owner]

Of course we should. I am upset with some women who put other women down. I just feel like we need to be more supportive because we need each other.

[SunsetRose]

This is a wonderful take!

[myTake Owner]

Thank you <3

[Spirit_Is_Free]

I like that take - Very mature, intelligent outlook on this phenomenon - I hope some find inspiration in this advice.

[Takyon]

Whoah, great text without feminist bullshit.