Why do I freeze up around the guy I like?

[Anonymous]

he tries to make effort talk to me, i should be making conversation and be flirty with him but i just get shy and tense up...and he probably thinks im not interested and emotionally cold. wtf do i do?

[amberry]

THAT HAPPENS TO ME TOO. I'm perfectly fine around every other guy and then when I come across my crush I completely freeze up. I've opened up to my friends and they just told me it's because I just need some more experience with hanging out with my crush. It's normal to be nervous when you don't know him very well, because you want to say the right things but don't know what the RIGHT things to say are yet. I think you should try to hang out with him more or approach him first, show confidence and the want to hang out more. That in itself will show him that you're interested, and once you know more about him, the conversation should get a bit easier. Hope this helped!

[Asker]

thanks i will its just been going on like this for a while now so im scared he's gonna forget me and move on

[amberry]

UGH DUDE LEMME JUST TELL YA. i've known this guy for around 3 years and I've liked since the very beginning. I did the same thing as you because I freeze up SO BADLY. I've just gotten the courage to really get to know him, and he's all I could ever want. He's going off to Boston (I'm in Cali) for 4 years of college this fall, and I regret pushing this back so much. We're not together because we're going our separate ways soon, but I totally regret not getting to know him sooner. Get him before you lose your chance.

[Asker]

okay i will! thanks love! u motivated me to come out and say it ill wait to see him in person

[amberry]

Good luck! I hope it goes as wonderfully as you could ever imagine (:

[Anonymous]

At least he hasn't given up on you!

You're probably overthinking things and or have him on a pedestal.

Remember you're on the same level as him so you can talk to him normal.

He likes you since he's talking to you, there's nothing to worry about.

[Anonymous]

He's on a pedestal in your mind you don't measure up

[TadCurious]

It sounds like you're overthinking and suffering from performance anxiety. Maybe you feel like you have to sort of be "on," and say the perfect thing and not say something stupid. He's making an effort to talk to you 'cause he likes you. Allow him to like you. Take the pressure off yourself and just be natural.

[Asker]

im trying really hard...i just freeze up like i dont even know what conversation starters to talk about

[TadCurious]

well, if it helps, sometimes being nervous can come across as being cute. Take HIM down from any pedestal you have him on. He's a guy who likes you. He's not your judge. You're fine the way you are, and he obviously is fine with you the way you are. It's not a test you have to pass.

[Anonymous]

You just got to make an effort. Its low risk anyways. I am going through the same thing with this woman. I am extremely attracted to her but she freezes up when I talk to her and treats me different than others. I don't know what to think but after several months I have basically given up.

[Asker]

dont give up. its a good thing she freezes up cause she has intense feelings for u and the fact she treats u different means you're special to her everyone else is just whatever. but its u she wants to make sure she doesn't mess up with or do something dumb around so she gets nervous. u should seriously just hint to her u like her to make her comfortable so she can get some assurance and open up to u as well.

[Opinion Owner]

Well I have already tried. Gave her many compliments and approached her to talk. Its hard because she avoids me and acts like I don't exist in front of her. I catch her stealing glances but she is very good at hiding it. Only when she is far away etc. She just needs to open up to me a little more. At least acknowledge me. You should do the same. :-)

[Asker]

but u should also be the man and be confident and ask her out. women shy or not love confidence in a man, its the sexiest thing ever, and the entire reason why girls fall for jerks in the first place.

[Opinion Owner]

Oh I have asked her for drinks in a friendly way at least 3 times. She pretty much flaked out each time. She almost went one time and when it was time to leave she got right in front of me stared very seriously and said hi then immediately left. I didn't even know she was there so was suprised. Prob could have handled it better but still I'm tired of the awkwardness. She can reject me whatever but if she really does like me than its her move.

[Asker]

yea thats true i agree 3 times thats overkill like her shyness is ruining everything i hope my crush doesn't get disappointed in me everyday i try to show more interest like touching being around him more doing more eye contact but as a shy grl it just gets awkward i think cause im insecure like im not pretty enough or im fat or something

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah don't worry. But keep doing that and definitely talk to him more. Give him very strong eye contact. That's how I know there was something special with this girl. Nobody looks at me like she does at times... Its ridiculous like a movie and the world stops right there... Ahhh when the world spins again it's back to frustration. Lol

[Asker]

ahhhhh so romantic! dont give up on her!! she just needs to break the walls down around her

[Opinion Owner]

haha actually i ran into her today and she actually said it was good to see me and that it has been awhile since... we will see it was just friendly but its something positive.

[serp777]

you simply don't tense up. Be flirty and make conversation. The solution seems obvious. The way to get will power does not seem easy though. Only you can choose.

[dudeman]

fear of rejection, it goes away with time, at least for me i just dont care anymore.

[Sex_Panther]

Accept your failures as a human and prepare to lose him.

[Asker]

no dont say that =[

[Sex_Panther]

Then come up with something. If you refuse to rise to the occasion you can't have the prize. We can tell you what to do all day but you have to want to. Do you want to? Do you want it badly enough? Am I a pee-wee football coach or what?

[Asker]

im scared if i tell him he will reject me and all of this was a lie

[Sex_Panther]

It's a risk. If you choose not to take it you will get nothing. If you choose to take it you could be crushed. This is a question of fortitude not aptitude, and I knew it too, boy am I good at this!

[imaguytoo]

Conquer your fears and see what happens or do nothing and never find out.

[ilovetm]

OMG that happens to girls too? I get so tongue tied I look like an imbecile - lol.

[Asker]

same i just freeze like a statue or ignore him like i dont see him

[ilovetm]

LOL I know the feeling. I can't seem to think of anything to say. It's like my brain gets shut off.

[Arwens-Fire]

Relax and talk to him.

[Asker]

i will