How do I get over the guy I lost my virginty to?

[Anonymous]

so I dated the guy I lost my virginity to for 10 months. He never treated me good. And I know I should of walked away a long time ago. He only brought me down.Here are some of the few things he said to me. I don't love you and I never f***ing did and I took him back, He called me whore when he is the only guy I have ever slept with. He said I was the definition of trailer trash when I don't even live in a trailer. He told me I need to quit acting like I'm amazing or something because I'm not. He was always in competition with me and he talked about me behind my back all the time. Now here I am hurt. I ran back to him 13 times and I don't want o run back anymore. I met a amazing guy who thinks the world of me but It is just so different being with some one else. I have to face my ex every day and it hurts so much. I don't want to go back but I don't know how to move forward. I feel like In his eyes I'm standing butt naked in a spot light. He knows every single thing about me, there is no hiding with him. So now what I really need help?!

[caitieliscious]

Yes, there are people out there who are frankly jerks. They, for some unknown reason, feel superior by belittling others. It really is quite sick sometimes.

Just from reading what you've written, I'm assuming that by a mixture of belittling you, and the fact you keep on running back to this guy, he feels like he has some type of control over you.

The way to get over this guy, in my opinion, is by confidence. If you are able to turn around to this guy , or display, that you are completely and utterly comfortable within yourself, then he has no way of hurting you. However, the bad news is that you need to be confident with yourself , not confident because of another person. The only way to achieve this, I'm sorry to say, is to be single.

It's good that you have identified that what this guy says to you is rubbish, all you need to do is believe it and show it. Yes, facing exes every day is hard at first, but if you show that you don't need him at all in your life then eventually you will start to believe it. Just try to see him as an insignificant dot.

Of course everyone remembers their first time, but it does not necessarily mean they are 'the one'. Do not feel like a failure, or a whore because it didn't work out with this guy. Just don't let what he tells you taint future relationships, as he clearly has a problem that doesn't affect you.

Good luck!

[hopestrengthcourage]

alright, I know how you feel I did the same thing.. accept my ex of 2 years who I also lost my varginity to was violent and he went to jail and we had a whole court case. which made it harder to face him at school.you are always more attached to the ones you lost ur V-card to. and I kept running back to him because he made me feel like I wasent able to get any other guy. Verbal abuse is horiable and that's what he is doing to you my ex was also verbally abusive calling me fat even after I lost 49lbs and ugly ( I model) and that I only thought about my self! I later realized this was all false but!. At first when you meet a new guy who thinks everything of you, it will be weird and akward because its a nice change that your not use to. The guy I saw after my ex liked me since we were two I kissed him and ran away crying. because I didn't no how to deal with it. in my oppion stick with this guy,. hold your head up high when you face your ex. beacause your a beautiful woman. And your smarter then him. you shouldnt feel ashamed of having a new guy in your life inbrace it:) and when you see your ex. mention it to him. because then it shows him how strong you are and that your capable of finding someone better:D you want to prove him wrong. and eventually your feelings for him will fade. it takes time!

[Crazycanuck]

Listen you are on the verge of an abusive relationship. Nobody has the right to treat you like that get as far away from him as possible. This asshole doesn't deserve you at all. When you go crawling back to him your giving him the power that he needs to control you. Don't give it to him.

If you want to forget about him I suggest you start a relationship with that other guy you mentioned and when you see you ex just don't look at him and ignore any rude comments that he throws at you. It will be hard at first but it will also get easier with time.

P.S Almost nobody stays with the person they've lost their virginity to. Its a fact of life

[GrapeSoda]

DITCH HIS ASS! Girl, you are way too good to be verbally abused by that bastard.