Why are so many girls BORING to talk to?

Question

in my whole life its always been absolutely eye rollingly, deep sighingly, BORING to talk to most women. I've met a few that were interesting to talk to even if we talked about something neither of us was familiar with but they can be counted on one hand. ill give examples 
group discussion: everyone is just chilling talking and having fun doing so but the girls only talk every five minutes and mostly just sit there and laugh when someone else says something funny and eventually add on to a joke.

solo conversation: you're talking about a subject you both know about and like but have to carry the whole conversation almost because she doesn't know what to say ever. 

the only way I've seen to get them to talk is for them to talk about themselves and even then all though they said a lot they didn't really tell you much.

Ozanne · Accepted Answer

I think you might want to assess your social surroundings. Are you one of these guys who just talks about anything, but you are meeting a girl someplace like at a gym, and she's working out with friends? (Probably busy, and not there to talk.) Are you one of these guys who only knows about so much, so you talk about some things and wait for her to chime in with what she knows, not getting your queues? (She might feel intimidated.) Are you asking her about HER, this is the one way that is almost guaranteed to get a woman interested, is ask things about herself so that you come across like you care (because you do) and she gets to talk about her favourite subject: herself. If you just talk about you, and topics you know about, you might lose her. She might feel as though she can't or won't keep up, and you run the conversation show and she feels on the spot to let you know what she can say about what you only know about.

I'm just trying to piece it together because there aren't any examples, but I think that yes, you might meet boring girls who have gotten in to iphone habits and just don't know how to react to real life socializing, and if not, and there is a girl who has her phone put away and she's not talking, she could be tired, not sure what to make of you, not wanting to say the wrong thing, or she might enjoy listening to you. If her physical language tells you that she likes you, it could be that she's shy and wishes she had more to say so you should give her time. But DO NOT make her feel stupid or boring. If you like her enough to give it another shot to see if she has anything to say, encourage it out of her rather than making her feel idiotic.

indian_empress_91 · Accepted Answer

Then don't be with us, go be with men and leave us be. I think that your opinion is subjective. And I can carry conversations with anyone of any race, age and sex. The only thing I would say negative about myself is that being able to i have realized i prefer my own company and very rarely of others.

I could never say why are men just horny desperate beings with no standards. Cause I opened my mind and met guys who are genuine and kind and so much more to them.

You keep your mind closed and be persistent about thinking this way of women and you will never find the woman you want. This type of thinking of yours is why some men don't value a woman and hence lose them.

Kisum · Accepted Answer

I think you just haven't met a girl you find interesting yet, once you do then the flow of conversation will be easy.

Try asking them questions that require thought and would reflect the depth of their personality.

Kinstrome · Accepted Answer

I guess I'm forced to pick B because there isn't a "No, you're mistaken, girls aren't necessarily boring, and it's obvious if you give it some thought" option.

If you're continually finding boring girls, you probably aren't good at getting girls to talk about things they like. A guy with little effort can get a girl to feel comfortable talking about things she enjoys, and enjoys explaining, like a favorite movie, a personal hero, a scientific theory, a clothing style, etc. Even apparently ditzy girls have something they like to talk about. They just tend to be afraid of sounding stupid, and reserved if they think a guy is going blast them about it.

The best book I've read on how to make people speak comfortably is Conversationally Speaking. If you know how to let people know that you aren't going to say something hurtful, they will be willing to talk about almost anything.

Theguyoverthere · Accepted Answer

I think a lot of it has to do with maturity. I personally can converse really well with older women. Yet when in at a table 1 on 1 with a girl in her 20s I get no feedback. I feel like this age of technology is to blame in a lot of ways. It is killing communication. I would be more understanding if I just encountered a dud here and there but I notice this far too much amongst the age groups nowadays. They can text all their desires yet face to face they're more likely to pass out on the ground from the stress of confrontation.

Arcano · Answer

The group settings-- well, that is a toss in the air. There will be a wide range of personalities and temperaments who could be sitting there, and not all are readily comfortable to engage in conversation, especially if others seem involved and energetic with each other. That said, women are conditioned to be "ladylike" from a young age-- and sometimes that manifests itself in an overstatement of presumed "politeness" and/or not knowing how to properly interject into a discussion.

It is an individual thing, in most cases. I would say the same about many of the men I have met. They have just not personally interested me, or I found their behavior unappealing. I wouldn't say all are boring, of course, and that goes for women, too-- there is simply a certain type of person we are intrigued by, and they may or may not often be plentiful in the environments we're usually in.

pavlove · Answer

Don't pay attention to girls on here. It's in no way a reflection of how women you meet in the reality think or behave.

Moving on from that, they're boring because they tend to live a life of reaction. They never have to come up with conversation because either the guy does it or the group does (the lead hen) and so girls always react to what the group is talking about and rarely have to learn to generate interesting conversation from within. To be fair, a lot of guys don't like girls with a lot to say (hence why a lot of bullied/ignored girls get on GaG to try to empower themselves through a computer.) So, even if they do have a lot to say with you, many will be more silent than you are because they've learned that's what guys like.

kxera · Answer

They probably aren't boring. You two probably just don't have something worthy of conversation or just don't emit vibes that attract one another. A lot of girls feel the exact same way about most guys. I find it when I'm speaking to most guys that they don't put effort into the conversation; on the other hand, I've spoken to guys who are great conversationalists. It's just a matter of whether both people are compatible, conversationalists, or have something to talk about. You could be the boring one to them. Just be sure to contribute to the conversation equally and mention different topics to see where you two have common ground. If there isn't then maybe you two just weren't meant to vibe / have a conversation.

SoEsoteric · Answer

I'm going to go ahead and say I feel most girls are downright not very interesting to talk to, though I can explain.

I'm huge into cars/car culture, I love music, enjoy working with my hands, so on and so forth. Generally the ladies I know aren't into the same things as I am, so they don't pique my interest beyond shallow physical attraction.

On top of this, I've never been much of a social person, nor do I have good social skills. Meeting people is hard for me, and I'm a terrible conversationalist. It does not help that I'm only 18, because I like to talk about more intellectually stimulating topics that girls have no interest in.

Long story short, it could be you, it could be her. I guess it's all about finding the right person.

Queen_naki5 · Answer

Then don't talk to us. It's okay. We don't live to entertain you. :-P Just kidding :-D

Truthfully, you might just be talking to the wrong girl (s). I have to talk to someone that I can have an intelligent conversation with, or else I can't talk to them. We have to have a topic of interest, whether it be politics, literature, video games, music, or you name it. That's just me. I can't be on the phone being lovey dovey or having phone sex all day, eventually we'll have to talk about something exciting. My advice, have a topic. Stick to that.

TheDevilInside · Answer

I'm asking the same thing about guys too. Some guys only answer texts in just one or two words, and don't make an effort to continue the conversation.

I once had a date with a really boring guy. There were many awkward silences between us. One day I asked him "so how was your day?" He said "good." and didn't ask me how MY day was. I can't help but wonder how the hell was he ever married? Was his ex just as boring?

With girls, it could be that they expect the guys to keep the conversation, so they're not used to making the effort. Or just had lost the capability to do it.

lemonlimetime · Answer

That's probably true I'm not going to lie. Probably not every girl, like I think I'm pretty interesting (probably not), but most of the average girls I meet aren't people I have long conversations with tbh. Now some of my close buddy's yeah we have good convos but if it's a girl who I'm sorta friends with but I don't really know I have almost nothing to listen to except for the same things most of the time. When I talk to some of the guys I know they're freaking awesome. Guys keep the conversation burning while most girls just mention the same things over and over again, which I have more than likely done before. No I don't have anything against girls, especially since I am one, but most I talk to just don't have much to keep a conversation running. I have no idea why we're like this. Maybe it's because the majority of us aren't into things like video games or something.

AleDeEurope · Answer

At the beginning yes, some of them are boring, I don't know if it's shyness or what, but it is true, or at least in my experience, that when you approach a girl they're somewhat boring to talk to, like you're always the one trying to keep the conversation going. Or if you go on a date, you're the one bringing up the topics, and she just answers.
But later, when they get more comfortable with you they're the best to talk to. I rather be talking to a girl than to a guy, I feel like girls are more interesting.

lumos · Answer

what if you're actually the boring one bc every girl on earth is fab

skullly · Answer

It's usually because the girls you're attracted to, are the ones who are not into what you're into... They probably find you boring as well, since you're not into what they're into...

Either you don't find girls that share your same interest, attractive...
OR... you have not yet come across the girl who is into what you're into and is also appealing to you.

Anonymous · Answer

Oh man, you aren't lying with this one lol

Trying to talk to girls is soooooo hard, and not because I find it hard myself. It's hard to try maintaining a very unbalanced and one-sided conversation with a gender that usually is well known for how chatty and talkative it is.

So I guess that's the answer: they're shy or they are too practiced in small, meaningless talk and not practiced enough in meaningful, dynamic conversation. I'm not sure if girls are still just really shy and aren't expected to deal with that. Whatever it is, it's annoying and I really can't wait until all this equality stuff starts taking off lol

Anonymous · Answer

they r not... they r interesting people basiclaly

LauraMarx · Answer

they are just waiting for you to leave. You're interrupting their conversations. They become much more animated when you aren't around

YourFutureEx · Answer

Yes it's very hard to find interesting girls. Most are boring (I repeat not all but many). Seriously. I wanted to ask the same question but you asked it. Thanks.
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I think the reasoning behind this is counter interests and daily routine.

1GuyOpinion · Answer

I'm like the opposite. Here is my experience :

When I talk to my guys friends, all we talk about is boring superficial stuff (what we doing today etc) , but when I talk to my female friends, we can get into deep stuff , like our feeling and thing that life fuck us over. I'm not the type of person that open my feeling to anyone and I feel like I can only truly open up when I talk to my female friends.

I think it just depend on each person.

WeaponZero · Answer

Girls who conform to social norms are inherently boring because the media preaches that all they have to do is worry about their looks and the rest takes care of itself. As a result, the ones who go against social norms end up being the only ones that are cool and interesting.

thou_bookish_worm · Answer

If you want to talk to an interesting girl, try talking to a writer! I mean, suuuure you might have to ask her why she happens to be researching how hard you would have to hit someone with a Pringles can to kill them, but at least it's not really boring.
Perhaps if you found something that she loves (For example: I LOVE "Harry Potter" and "The Mortal Instruments".) and got her talking about it, then you could possibly end up with the outcome of an interesting conversation.
You could try asking them questions such as: "What's one thing on your bucket list?" Or "How would you want the world to remember you?"
Basically things that require thought and pondering for a bit. Some girls aren't boring, nerds especially. (I have been told I'm interesting and complicated.) You just have to find what makes 'em tick. 😊

amarahorrorstory · Answer

Usually I find guys boring. I have had a couple of friends who would bring out the fun and I love talking to them. I usually sound boring because I into shit that weirds other people out. (Can anyone help me answer my most recent question, I need help.)

Anonymous · Answer

I notice this. I want to find out what's important to them and talk about it or have philosophical discussions and gain their insights but it seems like they often just don't want to. I've had long philosophical discussions before and personal discussions but most of the time it's not like that.

Ambitions? "lol idk"
Thoughts on X? "lol idk"

It makes sense that we'd need to find something in common/interesting to talk about but it's like girls put the onus on me to do that. Surely they'd be keen to bring up subjects they care about, right? Pssh, apparently not. It's like pulling teeth.

justbanANNAz · Answer

LOL i can actually relate.
but then again, maybe ur kind of boring too:) it could be both of u. i mean, when I'm having a conversation, i know it's a really good one when i dont have to even think of what to say next, it just flows.

Why are so many girls BORING to talk to?

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