Girls who use Tinder: Why do you match but never respond?

[BlazeRider_]

It seems to be a common thing amongst girls. I'm not talking about just myself, my male friends have said this too. I'll get a match, and with whatever intro I use, some girls just never reply. You sometimes see they're active on tinder, but they just ignore messages. Even though, most of their bios say to "message them first..."

What is the point in being on Tinder in the first place? Do girls really just use this app to help with their self-confidence or something?

[Kkaos]

It's a really good question. Sometimes it could be fake accounts, you always have to watch out for that. But other than that, I've got no idea. How could you possibly get an ego boost from finding out that someone who you don't find attractive is attracted to you.

And do they seriously think guys are singling them our as being princesses in particular when you've got guy's doing crap like this..

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Qgnxb-O-CBQ

Getting a match from most guy's means nothing. The good thing to take here is man, if you message her and she responds, awesome. If you message her and she doesn't respond, it means she's obviously insecure, attention seeking, probably got a lot of baggage.. And basically someone you want nothing to do with, therefore it's good you found out early.

[guy532]

if you want a girl to start talking with you, you should message her as soon as you two match. Don't wait, the longer you wait the less of a chance she'll respond. Two thirds of girls respond this way. I actually went through my messages and I sent out 9 first messages in the past month and have gotten 6 replies, 3 numbers, 3 dates. Honestly could have gotten more numbers if I asked but I was too busy to see that many girls.

[BlazeRider_]

I already do message girls as soon as we match. :|

[guy532]

what are your profile pics? What do you usually message?

[BlazeRider_]

If I had bad profile pics then girls would obviously not match me in the first place. And my messages depend on my mood, sometimes I will say something formal or witty. But no matter what kind of message I send, they don't even reply wtf...

[guy532]

No, that's wrong. Just because a girl swipes yes it doesn't mean much, it only means that you're at the very least above her minimum attraction level. Have you ever seen your female friend's tinders? I've seen about 5 girl's tinder profiles and all of them had +150 matches (average girls) and one had 600 something... yea 600 and she was average pretty (8). Are you catching my drift? Why should she reply back to you when you're at the low end of her attraction level when she has another guy who's interested and she's way more attracted to him? Remember she knows nothing about you two other than pics and small talk convos, that's it, the other dude can be hitler reincarnated and she wouldn't even know it. That's why having really good profile pics is important and why just matching doesn't mean much. See you fall into the illusion of planning and effort, basically if everyone is a super hero then no one is. The average guy will put in as much effort as you do so guess what? You'll just

[guy532]

be another joe that she swiped right to. It's only the guys that go beyond that that are "heros" and actually get the girls. You could be sending seeking approval messages for all I know. I need actual real examples. You could be sending aomething that you think is fine but is really mehh. Remember, you need to get her attention and it has to be done within the first few messages and the moment you have her you ask her out and then her number, it shouldn't take more than 10min. Remember she's already attracted to you, the more time you spend talking with them the greater the chance you'll say something stupid which might make her hesitate. Even after you set up a date don't have any contact with her (unless she contacts you first and then you keep it very short) until the day or two before the date (usually just one day, but if you planned it over a week ago it's good to check up 2 days before). Anyway, I need actual examples of first messages.

[Astypulk]

Because as a girl you get a lot of messages from guys on Tinder. I mean a lot! And usually you do not have the energy nor the time to respond to all of them.
The shear volume makes it hard to keep conversations straight. And really I'm not even that good looking. So if twenty guys are messaging you, how many really can you respond to and still have an actual conversation? Either way guys, it's not you. Just bulk message and try not to get to frustrated.

[Puppylove94]

I do that. It's not an ego boost.. but I just find it entertaining to scroll through TBH. Plus you get so many of the same messages it just gets old

[lualesca]

I would date to say that 95% of women never respond to text on Tinder, i wish they were punished somehow. Like if the app detects someone sent you a text and you haven't reply in 3 days, you shouldn't be able to swipe for 6 hours or something like that.

[1hope4all]

1. I actually came with the same percentage 95% of women on tinder (Melbourne Australia). Sadly 95% aren't capable of long term relationship material (not now & not ever may be up to another 5% of them could mentaly heal and mature with time). Meaning for the top 50% of men maturity wise they are competing for the 5% women on tinder. And given may be 3 times more men than women on these sites means every 30 long term material man we got 1 women long term material to match with, statistical men got 3.3% chance if they are looking for long term relationship to find a women. To be fair 40-60% of men on tinder are also not long term material.
2. Apps like tinder if they do punish people for doing things like not replying. They will almost onstintly lose 2/3 of thier female users I speculate. This is a reason given such a high proportion from both genders use these apps for attention seeking mostly these days at least, the top men who get most of the women would leave hence would significantly impact female motivation to stay, but also females who want attention would most leave and this would leave me with even a smaller pool of women to chose from in an already too small pool. The problem with these dating sites they want to get as much women on as possible so men could... And women would...

[1hope4all]

Oh just forgot to add something 95% of women on tinder (translate to at least 32% of women in real life) we propably have a lot more than this who are not suitable for long term. It could be they are shy or not extrevert or afraid not confident enough to go online or afraid, whatever etc.
Then say 40-60% men they do translate to upto 40-50% of men are not suitable for long term comitment in the real world.

It sounds like more men than women who are not suitable but the truth most of those men could change once they want to settle down and once they find a suitable women and in suitable environment however most of those women who have had traumatic past or what ever they will never be able to change to be truly committed only the top 5% of them can. It is how men and women biological wired for survival instincts.

So to conclude 70% of all tinder users are thier for ego boost and similar behaviour amongst the highest (excluding snapchat/Instgram and the like).

[fsu19]

I found this out but I don't worry about it. Girls who go silent get deleted☺. I get about 3 matches at minimum a day and I think a worse problem is lack of conversation skills.

[ThisDudeHere]

Perhaps they want to keep such guys as plan B. That or they picked them with no intentions at all.

[BlazeRider_]

If they have no intentions with me then why match me in the first place? 😂 Women make me confused.

[ThisDudeHere]

Because why not? It's as simple as swiping a finger so they lose nothing by doing it.

[_HimigNgKalayaan_]

I think they only like the attention of getting some likes

[Yolandi]

I read somewhere online that 80% of people on Tinder are men. This means that women are probably getting flooded with messages, including me, and sometimes it is a bit overwhelming and hard to know where to start.

[JCT666]

You're right. Girls only use that app for attention.

[guy532]

No they don't, most want to hook up. If you're not hooking up then you're doing something wrong (bad pics, bad first messages, bad convos/flow). I know plenty of guys and girls who use tinder and all of them have hooked up from people on tinder multiple times. Girls hook up even more, most have 150+ matches so it's so easy for them.

[JCT666]

@guy532 Of course they do, people use these apps for attention and ego boosts all the fuckin' time. For your information, I do not use Tinder or any other silly online dating platform. I prefer to play it the old-fashioned way by going outside and meeting girls from there.

[Kinstrome]

@guy532 That may have been true in the past, but it doesn't hold now. Tinder is crap, whether or not you're looking for hookups. My buddy and I have both used it, and neither of us is unattractive. We both have well-crafted bios. Neither of us has had any luck with Tinder *in recent times.* It's... yeah. It's crap.

[guy532]

Hahahaha so let me get this straight? You don't even use it and you know how well it works? Yea that gives you a lot of credibility ;). Who says I don't do old fashioned approaches as well? I have a damn good day game and can easily just go off that, but why should when I can also just use tinder and up my chances even more, it really is a numbers game you know. I've hooked up with girls from tinder and I know they've hooked up with other guys from tinder, I also know so many people that use it and they've basically all hooked up with people from tinder. You don't even fucking use it yet here you are saying it doesn't work. Yes, I agree there are girls out there who solely use it for attention, but who cares, they're easily filtered out within the first 10min of matching with them.

[guy532]

@Kinstrome I guess it depends on where you live too. Here at least people use it a lot and girls do follow through. I've actually noticed more success now than I did last year before I got into a relationship (obviously single now). I really think where you love plays a huge factor in it. Also, you don't need an amazing bio, mine is literally one sentence ending with lets grab some drinks. The most important thing are your pictures. Just because you're attractive, it doesn't mean you have flatering pictures. I'm only saying this because now I use completely different pictures than I did last year and there is a noticeable increase in hook ups.

[JCT666]

@guy532 I know how it works. I used it once and deleted it a long time ago. And what part did I say you didn't do it the old-fashioned way? I am merely speaking for myself. You might wanna read back again otherwise get your eyes tested. Also, I could not care less about your dating life or what do with it whether it's on Tinder or real life. It doesn't matter whether I don't use it anymore, it is my right to judge and I still stand by with I said. So take your pissy attitude someplace else.

[guy532]

Meh, I still think it's dumb to judge an app that you used once, especially something like tinder where it takes time for it to start working.

[Kinstrome]

@guy532 I use pretty good pictures. They have me centered, they show me doing various activities, from hiking to playing a sport to hanging out with friends, they show my face and full body at different angles, they show me smiling and not smiling. I read on sites devoted to dating app tactics exactly what kind of things women look for, and crafted my profile very carefully. Same with my bio's text; I looked it up and chose something confident but not arrogant, interesting but not over-the-top.

I probably right-swiped 500 times in course of my use with it, and of the ten or so matches I got that I wasn't 100% sure were fake accounts, none of them led to anything. Either the girls that use them are insanely picky (like, even more so than real life; I get girls that look at me often enough in real life to know that I'm at least not totally undesirable) or they are mostly not real accounts. I don't think it has too much to do with my region, but I could be wrong.

[Kinstrome]

I recognize that some people can have a good experience, but I think that that is much likelier to have happened in the past Tinder than in modern Tinder. And I'm not even looking for a hook-up, just to meet a girl for time at a coffehouse and see if there's relationship potential.

[cchris987]

Fat older girls respond all the time!

[Blitzkrieger]

-girls who use tinder
-only guys reply