What does it mean if a girl ignores my messages, but goes out of her way to talk to me in person?

[Anonymous]

So there's this girl I'm crushing on, but whenever I message her, most of the time she leaves me on read. But when we see each other in person, she talks to me like she doesn't. I guess I should also say that she has a boyfriend (long distance) and that could be a factor of why she ignores my messages, but why doesn't she ignore me in person too? I'm really confused with her behavior. I don't overtly hit on her, I occasionally flirt in person, but not that much. What do you think?

[Anonymous]

I have done this to a few guys I don’t find attractive, but sort of consider them acquaintances or friends. In person I talked to them but never went out of my way to talk to them. Maybe a casual hi to be nice because they run an open mic I attend. They would also just ask nosey questions and offer no help at all, like “when are you moving to (insert city here)?” Just increasingly pestering idle chit chat questions I got from other folks in my family as well. It was annoying eventually as I’m stressed about this moving thing and don’t need them asking me questions then offering no help. I see them as friends, either way.

[Asker]

Ah, the difference is that she goes out of her way to approach me and start a conversation with me, I rarely initiate the conversation in person, she does.

[Opinion Owner]

I do that with some friends - - ones I see as friends or ones who are taken already so that I know it will never go anywhere so I feel safe talking to them

[Ariel1990]

it meanis she didn't receive them, or she had no time to reply, or she prefere personal contact

[stoner101]

Girls are such complex creatures but it doesn't mean they cannot be understood, we make them appear more complex when we deny to accept the things that they do hoping that there has to be a reason or something but there isn't one. In your case your girl is ignoring you but isn't tough enough to do it on your face.✌🏽

[Towelette]

This.

[Anonymous]

First off, she's got a boyfriend! So I'd back off if I were you. Long distance or otherwise, that doesn't change anything.

Secondly, she could just be a bad texter. Probably not, though.

Last but not least, you MUST be confusing her niceness for flirtatious behaviour. It's a lot common than you'd think.

[Asker]

I have backed off, she approaches me in person and goes out of her way to talk to me. I never initiate the conversation, she does. I've even purposely ignored her, yet she still wants to come talk to me. I'm not the type of guy to try and get her to cheat, I've been cheated on and it sucks, wouldn't want that to happen to someone else.

[Opinion Owner]

Well, in that case, just always respond politely but maintain an arm's length of distance at all times.

Once you get a girlfriend, she'll probably take a hint.

If she still stays that way, she's just overly friendly and doesn't realise she's invading your personal space.

If this continues to bother you and she's coming on too strong, you can always tell her to back off, too! Trust me, you won't lose face with anyone over this. Again, do it politely. As with everything, there's a right and a wrong way to tell someone to back off.