Does intelligence in men intimidate you?

[CaptainClueless]

Girls, if a guy is smarter than you, like a lot smarter, do you find it attractive or intimidating?

[Hidden_P]

No not really. My father and mother both have phds in chemistry, all of my brothers have degrees.

I’m the only one who doesn’t have a degree.

My dad is a leading technical expert, my brother am integral software engineer for finance reasons, another brother a leading engineer in oil rigging:

And I can draw pretty pictures.

[JustAnotherGirlie]

No it’s not intimidating, it’s refreshing. The problem is when it’s paired with arrogance. Men who are very intelligent often know this and aren’t afraid to remind you. It’s annoying and I prefer not to deal with that.

But there are smart men who are down to earth. And that’s pretty great

[Clyde_123]

Great answer!😘

[TheLaila]

Depends on the 'kind' of smart he is. If he wants to intimidate me and make me feel inferior on purpose that would be a turn off. But if he is smart, he knows it but doesn't overwhelm me on purpose I'd definitely be interested. Intelligence is always hot.

[CaptainClueless]

Now we're getting to the root of the problem!
OK, say if a guy is unintentionally making you feel inferior, because he sees potential and expects more from you? How would you respond then? Would you assume he's trying to make you feel inferior?

[TheLaila]

I would prefer using my mind when I'm around him and that in my opinion is not a bad thing. However, if I'm insecure or unable to embrace my sensibility and feel bad about myself for not reaching upto his level then that might not be his fault but mine for not believing in myself. In this kinda situation I would usually say something straightforward like telling him how he's actually more expressive than me (wouldn't necessarily say smart ;) ) and that actually makes the other person more understanding of the situation.

[CaptainClueless]

You have given me a lot to think about.
I can recall an old crush, we're talking like 4 or 5 years ago, saying to me "I'm sorry I'm not as great as you!"
It came out of the blue for me, didn't know where it came from. I just responded with "What?"
She said "Nothing, nevermind."
I said "You doin' alright?"
She said "Yeah, girl stuff."
Figured that meant period so I dropped it.
It's funny, only now do I realize I unintentionally made her insecure about her own intelligence. I talked with her expecting she could converse on the same level. I did that with a lot of crushes.
For someone so smart, I sure am fucking stupid.

[smølf]

Intelligence and Americans definition of being smart is not the same thing. Besides intelligence aka IQ and social intelligence is two different things, adn most women prefer social intelligence over IQ.

[DaTruth01]

this is the smart man all women want and talk about, when they think smart they think "he has everything i want in a man plus smarts :

i.pinimg.com/.../...in-glasses-wearing-glasses.jpg

[pari22]

Both and the thing is I love intimidating guys. Also they're challenging and keep you on your toes. It motivates me to gain more knowledge so I can be of his level and discuss that topic confidently

[CaptainClueless]

Good to see there are people open and willing to learn!

[pari22]

That's right. Thanks

[reixun]

I LOVEEEEE smart boys, but only when they aren’t arrogant with it. My favorite moments are when my boo’s tells me shit I didn’t know because I love learning and random trivia. Smart boys make me wanna go to a museum and talk for hours about interpretations of art or reflections on historical pieces. With intelligence comes ambition and passion for whatever he’s going to do in life. Ugh I just love smart guys

[NomNom16]

Super attractive to me, and i hope he has good social skill too.
I usually found someone who's very intelligent doesn't have good social skill and sometimes too cocky. That's why i didn't date my colleague...

[CaptainClueless]

I am guilty on both accounts. I think our poor social skills is attributed by an almost nihilistic outlook.

[NomNom16]

Or too cocky because they thought they know everything... I was an engineering student, so some of them i knew like that. But either way, i still choose intelligent men.

[CaptainClueless]

That's not really what I meant by nihilistic. I meant more along the lines of:
"Oh you don't like hearing reality, nor are you willing to learn? Then you don't matter, your judgement doesn't matter. I'll say what I want, you're just background noise."
That is the intelligent, nihilistic mindset.
It's not that we like berating or putting people down, it's that there is an inherent loneliness associated with having intelligence. One that 99% of people can never understand.

[NomNom16]

That's sad

[CaptainClueless]

But to catch a guy who is very intelligent, you don't have to be as smart as he is.
All you need to be is genuinely interested in learning new things. It's a mindset change, that's it. Being interested and open to new ideas is the single hottest thing you can do.

[NomNom16]

Agreed. 😊

[estoydorado1]

Not really. There are many different types of intelligence. I have pretty high social, emotional, and experiential intelligence, I'm almost completely able to recall everything I've ever heard, and I don't base my self-worth off of others' accomplishments.

I find competence to be a very attractive trait in the opposite sex. Just because he's read more books doesn't mean he's better able to face down the real world. Keep that in mind too.

[i_am_shyvana]

I consider myself to be smart, and if a guy was smarter than me i wouldn't really find it intimidating, just impressive and i'd want him to teach me things that he knows. either that or i will let my competitive side release and try and learn whatever he knows

[desperatelyhungry]

I find it attractive, unless he's one of those people who rub it in. I would be worried about appearing dumb to him unless he had a good personality and could laugh off me knowing less than him. I think it's cute knowing that if I need help with math homework (and I will because I'm dumb af) he could help me.

[Anonymous]

There aren't many guys who are smarter than me, so guys don't intimidate me very much at all. :)

[CaptainClueless]

I know that feeling all too well :)

[Opinion Owner]

:) :)

[Fevster35]

Challenging but its the best , you can learn more on him.

[karahiri]

it's only intimidating if he is also socially intelligent. if he's smart but awkward as fuck, then... it doesn't matter, i don't want to date someone like that anyway.

[Kkaos]

Is him being socially intelligent intimidating because he could try to use that to manipulate you or something?

[karahiri]

@Kkaos it's more like he comes off as flawless.

[Levin]

Awkwardness can be quite charming :(

[karahiri]

@Levin Sometimes.

[mermaid175]

It's only unattractive if he is cocky about it or makes fun of me for not being "as smart as him."

[CaptainClueless]

I'm cocky about it, I'll own that. But I back my capabilities and claims with action.

[Sophylism]

I love it. That's why I always surround myself with smarter people in general. Although I feel intimidated I feel like that would help me want to try to catch up.

[BatmansWife]

I find it attractive. If he knows more about a certain subject or something than I do, I'll ask him to explain it to me.

[Kiki98]

It's extremely attractive, every guy i have ever had a crush on was really smart and clever, i believe it's one of the sexiest things in a man

[Anonymous]

I find it super sexy, he becomes more attractive and intimidating at the same time. If I really like him, I’d make the extra effort of understanding his interests and his mind.

[CaptainClueless]

Being open minded and open to learning new things is the sexiest thing a woman can do in my eyes. :)

[AFishy2]

No! I can appreciate a smart man... It is nice when there is brains inside a head lol

[menina]

I don't see why this would be intimidating. I actually find it very attractive and sexy haha

[QueenofCups]

Smart guys are attractive, but very few guys are a lot smarter than me.

[Matt57]

I don't see why women would be intimidated by intelligent men, or that men would be intimidated by intelligent women.

[Tgec2003]

No I’d find it attractive
I’m kinda smart so I like intelligence

[datgirl]

Its attractive, but I maybe a little bit intimidated.

[CaptainClueless]

Explain?

[Anonymous]

I'm very intelligent myself, so I love men that are really intelligent as well. I haven't met any guy that is smarter than me, but I have met men that are around my league

[CaptainClueless]

I know the feeling. Other side of the same coin.
Though I have met neither apart from my own family.

[Opinion Owner]

I have met only a couple of guys that actually intrigued me in the past. For me it is all about curiosity, I remember my first big crush when I was younger, it was guy in my class that I didn't really notice at first but I started realising how smart he is and that made me really curious about him, so I thought about him again and again until I realised I started liking him.

[CaptainClueless]

Well actually scratch my previous statement, I can recall one.
My senior year of high school I had 2 study halls back to back, so I had time to kill. So I would go around challenging random people to chess. Anyone willing, didn't matter. I won every time. But one time I challenged this kid named Michael. Now looking at him, you'd think he was just some weirdo. He had that Asperger-y vibe to him, scraggly beard, messed up hair, etc. You wouldn't think he'd be any sort of a challenge. So I challenge him and he says alright. So we sit down to play and...
He DEMOLISHED me, he absolutely destroyed me in less than 5 turns.
I wasn't even upset, I was just sitting there, mouth gaping in awe.
He didn't even try to toy with me, he just went straight for the kill. Match had to of lasted less than a minute. Going from winning every time to losing in less than a minute is a humbling experience. I challenged him everyday, determined to beat him. Never even got close, but I at least made the effort.

[Anonymous]

It is attractive, but some of these males that I have come across talk too much because they know too much and it becomes a turnoff.

[CaptainClueless]

Yup, I get this.
We need an outlet to share our knowledge. More often than not we choose the wrong outlets.

[Opinion Owner]

Yea, maybe next time they should choose wisely to avoid dumb outlets like me🤷‍♀️

[CaptainClueless]

I don't think it has anything to do with intelligence, it just has to do with a WILLINGNESS to learn. All it takes is curiosity.

[Opinion Owner]

okay

[Kiran04]

No, homeboy and I can have some meaningful conversations.

[hasrett]

Super attractive, like, instant pregnant. 😇

[Yourlegaladdiction]

Definitely attractive.

[CaptainClueless]

Explain?

[Yourlegaladdiction]

I tend to be attracted to people who achieved some things I aspire to be and as I aspire to be as intelligent as possible, I'm both fascinated and attracted when I see someone who's there. It's sexy. Plus I believe that in a good relationship, the SOs have to learn from each other and grow together and I therefore would never get with someone who drags me down. From experience, I know that if you're with someone smart and who knows what he's doing, it makes you become better and smarter so it's actually important to me.

[Sammt999]

Nope lol I find it as motivation.

[Anonymous]

No. I’m a woman, I like intelligence in men.

[CaptainClueless]

Explain?

[Anonymous]

Definitely not. It's an aphrodisiac!

[CaptainClueless]

Explain?

[Opinion Owner]

Basically it turns me on if he's intelligent

[TacosRAwesome]

I prefer intelligent men over stupid ones.

[Tgec2003]

Same

[unosey]

It's attractive

[CaptainClueless]

Explain?

[AudreyB88]

Very attractive.

[CaptainClueless]

Explain?

[Anonymous]

attractive and intimidating. but i like those two

[Opinion Owner]

I link*

[N2thing]

It's attractive.

[CaptainClueless]

Explain?

[BrookeAshlen]

Both

[CaptainClueless]

Explain?

[BrookeAshlen]

It depends really on the individual, but more so often they're a know it all. That can be intimidating due to the fact they're going to be an ass. Or they are rather smart but humble, so we find ourselves talking to get to know more about stuff.

[BrookeAshlen]

So you're either looking into a judgmental rude guy or the guy you can understand and talk to forever.

[CaptainClueless]

I try not to judge, but I do notice girls will try and impress me, often by lying. I notice and that's when I become judgmental. If they wouldn't lie and just be themselves, I would be able to talk to them forever. But when lying comes into the picture, instead of listening to her words, I start focusing on the discrepancies in her story.

[Anonymous]

yes sometimes it does

[PunkinPie]

Intimidating.

[Anon-ymous1]

How so?

[PunkinPie]

@Anon-ymous1 They tend to keep turning the conversation to their own ideas and opinions, so it starts to feel like a debate or contest.

[Anon-ymous1]

Hmm. I can see that. That's more of a specific personality thing though; I know several girls who are thusly described as well.

[PunkinPie]

@Anon-ymous1 I'm describing myself, sadly. It was rather eye-opening to consider.

[Anon-ymous1]

I hear you. We're all guilty of it at one point or another, and as long as it's not intentional, hopefully the people around us can forgive us for it.

[PunkinPie]

@Anon-ymous1 Yeah, I think it's a nervous habit, especially on first dates when we're eager to impress.

[Anon-ymous1]

True.

[Chanel1981]

Certainly not

[Anon-ymous1]

Certainly not what?

[Chanel1981]

@Anon-ymous1 I was answering the initial question regarding intelligence being intimidating.

[Anon-ymous1]

Gotcha. He just then also added on "do you think it's attractive or intimidating"

[Chanel1981]

@Anon-ymous1 I think it's attractive if a man is intelligent, quite the opposite if they're not.

[disgustingweebtrash]

I'm dumb

[UnknownXYZ]

www.court-records.net/.../bratworth-shrug(e).gif

Your username precedes you...

[disgustingweebtrash]

@UnknownXYZ I know

[CT_CD]

Yes...