Are men afraid of intelligent women?

Question

Germanium · Accepted Answer

No.

A real threat would be a dumb woman with aggressive tendencies, lack of morals and wielding a weapon targeted at me.

But what lots men do hate are arrogant women.

There are different forms/types of intelligence. Understanding languages, conceptual idea understanding, amazing muscle memory, highly knowledgeable, and many more. You might be smarter than your SO, but are you smarter than him at EVERYTHING? He may not have the same brains you do in the same department, but he has some elsewhere.

It comes down to the person you're looking for. Of course, most of the guys here say "No, I'm not intimidated", well okay, that's their opinion. Done. But it seems from your updates, is that you crap on everyone's opinions except for other women who state the same "pshhh, men can't handle smart women!" Correct me if I'm mistaken, but the only comment you liked was another woman's bigotry. She perhaps is right that most men are unknowingly lying about not feeling intimidated from bookworm smarter women, but not all men are like that. I honestly wouldn't be with a girl if I constantly complained about her. What's the point then? You'd have to be stupid to get together with someone you're not attracted to. When you love someone, you overlook their flaws anyways, and later on just become accepting of them. The guys who need to act like a fatherly figure to their spouse, have some unfinished business with their insecurities.

You yourself are insecure. Until you get over that, you won't be able to accept others' opinions about this subject.

It matters about the one person who I or you are searching for. It matters about that one person you want to be with. That person's opinion is what you should care about. Does he love you for being smarter than him? Do you guys attract each other like magnets, one the dominant, the other submissive? Does he love that you're the brains of the relationship, the major decision maker, the critical thinker, the problem solver? Do you understand that, a relationship takes the effort of two people, and not just yourself?

To conclude my opinion,
I'd love a spouse who I can relate to. She's supposed to be the person I love romantically and can relate with, as well as be affectionate towards and make her smile with gifts. It's a given that any girl I date, is going to be smarter than me in at least one way. Lots of guys just fear that if she happens to be smarter than him at his strong suit, then he can't provide or add to anything.

OatsnWhey · Accepted Answer

No, we're not. Intelligence is always seen as a plus in regards to dating value. Logic tells me that it would not hinder your success in dating at all, considering that you don't exceed several standard deviations above average. At that point, you would experience a lot of trouble in relationships and just communication with others in general.

You're most likely unattractive to men for reasons other than your intelligence for the fact that intelligence is a desirable trait. This is just a way for you to cope. Self-proclaimed intelligence in the context of you attempting to create this false pretense illusion of superiority is unattractive... If you want to correct the issue, then straying away from delusion would be your best solution. That way, you can identify the real issue and not turn people against you by attempting to make them feel inferior to you.

This is just delusion at its finest. You are by no means above men that don't actively pursue you. They don't pursue you because they don't find you attractive. It has nothing to do with your intelligence. Accept that.

PunkinPie · Accepted Answer

This is really hard to answer because it's so subjective. No matter what you are like, some people will look up to you and others will look down. Someone with a bachelor's degree can seem pretty mediocre to a PhD, but intimidating to someone who barely finished high school. I've often been accused of being stuck-up when I was just using the normal vocabulary of grad school or work. It's like you have to be two different people... the smart one trying to stay in the game at the office and the cute, meek one that's socially acceptable elsewhere. (And the mom, daughter, sister, friend... so many hats for so many people!)

As someone else said, intelligence comes in many forms. I'm very good at math but not with practical stuff. My ex and I complemented each other that way.

Basically, I think guys want woman who make them feel smart, whatever that means to that particular guy. It usually falls on us to figure out what he needs us to be and how to make him feel manly and respected.

Onlythisone · Accepted Answer

I think all people are afraid of whatever they don't understand... Intelligence is a very broad factor however, so it usually isn't that, rather, different ways people try to show it. A lot of boys are scared of me but I don't think it's because they think I'm intelligent. It's because they don't understand, they have a view of what I should be and when I don't fit into that archetype and behave accordingly they get scared... Generally people assume I'm an idiot because I tend to be happy, don't argue, don't understand humans whatsoever, and look/act the part of the dumb blond. It isn't until/unless they are in situation with me that requires thinking that they realize I can be so nonchalant because it isn't even a competition. So what people don't like in regards to intelligence:

1. People being assholes who want to fight about everything just to prove how "smart" they are

2. Not being able to get a read on people

azzntittiz · Accepted Answer

No man attracted to a smart woman. The call bullshit but it;s the fact no one can refute because of the staggering evidence.

Many women are not single because she is too flawed, but too great. Intelligence creates a women many men cannot fix, and they love a woman they can complain about while still taking care of her, as if he's her dad.

An intelligent woman doesn't have to open her mouth to be intimidating, everything she does exudes intellect, down to the way she dresses, even if not flashy.
Men are afraid of that. You can act dumb, but sooner or later it gets tired and he will get turned off and feel betrayed when you drop the act.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

It is wrong to overgeneralize about either gender. You are wrong in your answer to this question. I will not date a woman who does not have above average intelligence. In May, I ended a 2 year relationship with a woman who had an IQ that I estimated to be approx. 140-145. (But I never considered her to be my superior.)

If you were right about this issue, intelligent would never date, would never marry, and never procreate. Are you suggesting that every intelligent woman is an old maid?

Logorithim · Answer

I like it when a woman is intelligent. It could be that intelligent women are also more demanding, which could be what concerns men. In a number of societies, highly intelligent women have a harder time finding spouses. Note also that a large gap in two people's intelligence may impede communication between them.

AriesMan · Answer

Well, I certainly am not afraid of intelligent women! However, when it comes to trying to date one, if she picks up that I may not be as "intelligent" as she is, it usually means an instant deal breaker, and if the guy had his heart set on dating this otherwise amazing woman, well it is an ego crusher, and part of the problem for guys is not meeting a woman's standards, a woman not wanting to pass on our genes, looking at us as flawed! I am sure this primitive instinct plays into how we behave to this day, and hence why guys are uneasy around women of superior intellect, the feeling of inferiority and inadequacy.

I know what it feels like when you are looked down upon by someone who regards you as intellectually inferior to them! The thing is, intelligence does not limit itself to the field of mathematics, the sciences, history, or the arts! Where someone excels at one area they also flounder somewhere else and a person regarded as "dumb" by the previous intellectual, excels in the area where the intellectual person flounders! So, the moral of the story is, just be comfortable in your own skin because everyone has a flaw and everyone has something they excel at, we simply can't live up to the standards of others but that doesn't mean we can't live up to someone else's standards with where we excel at!

Anonymous · Answer

If you’re going to develop a killer robot, or poison the water supply, or hack into military drones and create Judgement Day with Drones, then yes. A little bit, at least.

If you’re intelligent for good, then I’m not scared. Maybe a smidge intimidated (as I can be with a lot of attractive qualities a woman could have) but it’s not quite the same.

The last two women I’ve had crushes on have post graduate degrees and have amazing jobs that require a lot of intelligence. So no, I’m not afraid of those women - and definitely not their intelligence.

Past celeb “crushes” have usually been women who are known for being intelligent (among other things like beauty or coolness factor).

I love an intelligent woman, but especially if they’re not condescending about it. If they are constantly treating people badly and constantly demand to be thought of as right on everything (I know a lot of guys like that), then it’s not so attractive. But if they are cool about it, then it’s a huge benefit.

Adam_INTJ · Answer

Personally, I really like intelligent people all around. it's when anyone, male or female, seems unattainably intelligent that I get defense and jealous. Partially because I'm gifted in that way too, so if someone (again, Sex doesn't matter) seems better than me within my own sphere of comfort, I panic and feel inferior. I've never met a male that is afraid of intelligent women. But I can understand that it would be a source of conflict. It's because men, more than anything else, need to feel respected. Other men know this and yield respect accordingly, but when an itelligent woman, not knowing that men desire respect so much, walks in and starts expressing superior intelligence over a man, the man feels disrespected and becomes deeply offended (especially if the woman is acutely smart).
SOLUTION: make a man feel respected, even if you have a vastly greater intelligence. Just aknowledge value in his imput and he will see that an itelligent woman won't automatically leave him feeling disrespected and hurt.

UnknownXYZ · Answer

No, men don't like women who are snobs and think they are better than other people because they have degrees or who are "successful" in their careers. We also don't like bitches who selfishly feel they are self-entitled whatever shit they feel they are entitled to. Men love women who are humble with their achievements in life and still respect those who doesn't have what they have and use that knowledge their for bettering and helping others.

WalterRadio · Answer

Intelligent women are intimidating to the average man.

I have a lot of female friends from college who are high level STEM. They either married other STEMs or are still single even after all these years. The problem is that men don't like to be shown to be stupid, and my friends can easily do that.

Personally, I have never met a woman demonstrably more intelligent than I am. They are experts in some field I am not, sure, but not more intelligent.

I strongly prefer intelligent women because I don't have to hold back.

JiminsHoe · Answer

I feel like you're asking for a gender war by that edit using the word 'superior'
It honestly depends on the person, if you're one who is competitive and arrogant yourself, you're probably going to feel challenged by that person who is smarter, and possibly fear being 'inferior' in terms of intelligence.
But most people aren't that competitive and don't fear someone being more intelligent, so I'd say most guys probably enjoy an intelligent woman, as long as they're intelligent themselves, otherwise they wouldn't be able to appreciate mutual intelligence.

Alan180188 · Answer

no we just get bored after a while...
impressing an intelligent woman is much harder, yet she might fake it if she likes you but she's less engaging in emotions and adventurous things and mostly thinks high of her self which makes her bending toward the man's needs and requests an almost impossible mission !
so eventually a man will get bored of trying or feel he's trying harder than it deserves, so he'll walk away for a less easier task, if it was his first time with an intelligent girl, and will not be interested in future to try someone from the same category !
so men are not afraid but mostly not interested for the hard work it takes and the low reward they get from it...

Anon-ymous1 · Answer

Hell nah. We're not "afraid" of any females at all; I think you meant "do guys find intelligent women unattractive?" And the answer is still no-- we definitely find intelligence attractive. It can be intimidating if she's smarter than us, in a different way than if you have a guy friend who is clearly smarter than you. Like, you aren't interested in fucking your guy friend, so his intellect isn't something that is always going to be on your mind, lol. People naturally want partners who are more or less their equal, and if a guy tells himself that he's not that bright, then meeting a girl who *is* very bright is tough for him to swallow. Same reason almost none of us want a girl who somehow would happen to be physically stronger or bigger than us.

Analinda1999 · Answer

this question makes it sound as if most women by default are unintelligent. as if uintelligent is the norm and, intelligent women are an unusual a subset of women that some men end up dealing with.

billions of men date billions of women. men can't generally be afraid of them. perhaps a subset.

babaganoosh · Answer

It's not intelligence that's scary, personally I find intelligence very attractive. It's the person using it that is and how they use it.
Just like muscle on the body, you can use it to help or to harm.
Intelligence unlike strength is a very powerful attribute that lacks no subtlety.
In the hands of anyone, man or woman thats greedy, a hater, angry or proud and esspecially the psychopaths you'd be foolish not to be afraid.
Afraid of intelligent women, depends, friend or foe? Intelligent foes keep their friends close.
Are women more afraid of strong men or wise ones?

Political_dude · Answer

It isn't intelligence which they're afraid of. Intelligent women tend to be more independent which causes very high self esteem, ego and attitude issues. Nobody dates these kinds of people because they feel they're always right. Also, this thing isn't actully gender based. Intelligent men tend to be single too

lastchancemotel · Answer

Your updates show me your not as smart as you think ;) you don't ask me questions then tell them they are stupid, you just ignore them just like I ignore stupid women. intelligent men are turned on by intelligent women, we want you to be able to get an involved in our conversations as we are, cause honestly if you have nothing to contribute to every conversation not involving drama, we don't want to hear you speak at all, which is it's own turn off all together.

AlphaGhost · Answer

It depends upon your definition of intelligent,
cuz if you think "You are intelligent but man are scared of your intelligence and they dump you for that" , than darling "You really need to think that being intelligent part through".
Intelligent woman are very rare but they are never alone and if you think you are intelligent, you made mistakes.

MrMysteryMan · Answer

I think intelligence is sexy in a woman. If you push your intelligence on me, then you're just being an asshole and are not being considerate of the person you're with. That's different. But I would rather have a very intelligent woman than a hot imbecile.

BeeryNice · Answer

I've experienced it. Men who have told me they're intimidated because I'm smarter than them.

The thing is, I'm hesitant to assume anyone is less intelligent because I know intelligence comes in so many different forms. I am intelligent but I am terrible at maths, so I try to remind men of that if they're getting flustered because I know a few extra words.

gGreat · Answer

Same question could be asked to girls because smart guys aren't exactly considered a catch by girls. Do you see women queuing to date physists? Mathematicians? But girls do bend over backwards for athletes, actors.
Intelligence is threatening to ignorance, regardless of the sexual organ a human being carries. May I ask you what's your profession?

Lunelove · Answer

It really depends on the guy and what he's looking for. All people will say "yes I think smart is sexy" but it really comes down to what that person is looking for in a relationship. If that person is immature they are going to stay with the less intelligent lady... but if they are a man who is comfortable in his own skin... he's gonna go for the best.

mattai787 · Answer

I crave for intelligent women.. I don't have any problem with her being intelligent.. But please - no bossing around.. If you are intelligent that's great, I'd still expect you to sit down with me and discuss the important matters.. like where we would be investing our money, our baby's name etc..

MScifiwriter · Answer

I would ADORE and love an intelligent woman!!! Someone who can hold a brilliant conversation, pick up on wit, and be witty right back would be absolutely DIVINE!!! Not to mention be able to have a conversation regarding world topics, economic issues, political instabilities. The list goes on, so again I would love to have an intelligent girlfriend!

Melkorshallreturn · Answer

I usually find myself more attracted to smart women. Also, it's important to note that it's pretty hard to know if a girl's smarter than you before you start dating, because there are so many things that go into being smart. It's extremely rare that I can actually perceive someone as being smarter than me, because I don't get a good insight into people's thought process.

JamieG64 · Answer

Only the stupid ones, but they're usually afraid if intelligent men to. That said many men are intimidated by intelligent women because they are afraid of looking stupid and getting rejected. These however, are usually men who value intelligence in women.

TheGoodGuy1337 · Answer

I dont think men hate/are afraid from succesful women, its the fact that women think they're better and higher than the man and start treating him like a piece of meat. succesful women often are rude, have big egos and tend to fight a lot with other people over not so small things. i personally like succesful women who take charge sometimes, but hell, if she thinks thats a pass to give me hard time? she better pack

normalice · Answer

I don't know if "afraid" is the right word. Perhaps wary? Anyone who considers themselves intelligent usually isn't. Combine believed intelligence with actual ignorance and you basically have the recipe for a conservative. I couldn't date a conservative, no..

Now, if she's actually intelligent, that's fine. But it takes a while to confirm that.

chris1984 · Answer

it's "intelligent" in this context ;)

anyway, people are overwhelmed by many different aspects of a person. some men expect their women to be ignorant and subservient. i like my partners to have charisma, wit and strength.

why would i want to fuck someone who is not a challenge for me? who can't understand my jokes, or stand up to me when i am wrong, or inspire me to grow as a human being?

so no, i am not afraid on an intelligent woman.

adamprice71 · Answer

only the weak minded, insecure, unconfident, and those who would consider themselves players but haven't the brains to play with lettered blocks. i find intellegent women to be a breath of fresh air compared to the dense airheads i find around this town im in

Nate83 · Answer

The problem is when you use terms like "superior and smarter", you may have achieved a fantastic level of intelligence naturally or through years of study and application, but that doesn't make you better than someone else. It does mean you may make better choices and have forethought where others don't though. So the issue isn't if a woman is intelligent, the issue is if she has a massive ego because of it and talks down to others.

Mindsets2020 · Answer

Intelligence has to do with self development as with awareness and character and communication...
Which are some of the pilar of friendship... You can be smart however with out those skills you both will miss chemistry !
Poor people disable people overachiever a like need bounding!

FatherJack · Answer

I have far more respect for an intelligent & independent woman , but with good character , than a dumb " media " influenced sheep of a woman. I do NOT like the " Strong Independent Womyn TM " types that are nasty , arrogant & condescending , most tend to be masculine , yet also look down on men too , they often prove to be not as smart as they egoistically think they are.

WhistleForTheChoir · Answer

Intelligent people get screwed in the dating pool, especially intelligent women. It might be intimidation, it might be other factors as well though too. Not to sound arrogant, but I haven't met very many people who were more intelligent than me or quite on my level. I know intelligent women can engage in the best conversation, but none of the highly intelligent women I've met were available. Also most intelligent women I know date the absolute dumbest fucking dudes.

Chiral · Answer

I think it's definitely more problematic in a relationship if the female has significantly superior intellect to the male. I don't think it is impossible though and I don't think the problem is all in the mind of the male. Women on the whole want a partner they can "look up to" in some way. Men want a partner to whom they feel they have something to offer. This doesn't need to be intellect, it can be wisdom, strength of character or a specific skill or ability.

TripleAce · Answer

No
She's probably just arrogant and intrusive vs humble and intelligent

There is nothing really to be afraid of from intelligent people. Just there is a time and place to use your knowledge. Over stepping on every situation like you know it all won't sit well with others, even if you do know it all --> makes others feel less valued

Balance is key!

Nivinxus · Answer

Not really, but I do find women who think they are smarter than they really are a bit annoying, but that's honestly the same with men. On the plus side, overconfidence in these people makes it more sweeter when they realise they aren't superior anymore.

Peopleschamp · Answer

This is probably a bad example but I remember an episode of Family guy where Brian dated a girl that was way smarter than he was and eventually he got tired of it because she just kept correcting him on every little thing and I believe she thought it was cute that he was not as smart as her which was an insult. So yeah, don't be like that.

pervertedjester · Answer

As a lucky if I have average intelligence man, I am wary of truly smart people in general. If the conversations go above my head I resort to dumb humor to try and bring it back down to my level. Most women I date are usually smarter than me though who I just assume are tired of dating "know-it-alls" which is fine until they tire of slumming it.

manpower61 · Answer

"the smarter the woman is, the likely she's ugly, fat or a feminist. The hotter the woman is, the less likely she needs a high paying job to support herself. These so called smart women only have a carreer because they learn from an early age then men are not interested in fucking ugly chicks." -mgtow 101

Torex · Answer

I am not afraid of an intelligent person, I am afraid of scheming people. It just so happens that the more intelligent one is, the more complex the scheming can be. That being said I like girls as smart or smarter than me, because they can hold their own in conversations if not force me to rethink my entire thought pattern. While that can be painful it is so fun to feel challenged and get a chance to change one's own way of thinking for the better.

Thebruja · Answer

Most Narcissistic men love to prey on these type of women. Not because they love their intelligence, but because they can't stand a woman that's way smarter than they are so they turn up the charm to break the girl and bring her done. It's better to play a dummy first to catch a dummy. Simple.

playfun42069 · Answer

Yes i am. Not because i dont want them doing better than me but because they always be correcting me n shit 😂✋ like i get im moving up but leave my ghetto ass as is lol. Thank and cause they are usually really funny, make me laugh to much and thats my job 😂😂✋

AndrewMG · Answer

The boring answer is that there is in excess of a billion males in the world, much as most of my relationships have occurred with fellow girls at uni (and therefore almost certainly more intelligent than me lol), I'd suggest that people are individuals and don't react to boring stereotypes, if 50% of the worlds population all thought the same they'd be no point in having this website!

ChronicThinker · Answer

No man who has guts and a spine is, and a lot of stone cold bitches make the WRONG excuse that they are just too intelligent, too sexy, or whatever as the reason why men don't want to approach them.

Nah, you just a bitch.

Kiki98 · Answer

I think all people are intimidated by people who are superior to them by any kind of quality, whether it's intelligence or wealth.
Dealing with someone better than you can be intimidating for both genders

sye1776 · Answer

According to every study about this: men says they aren't afraid of intelligent women unlesss they're obviously smarter than they are.

Basically men don't necessarily want someone dumb, just slightly dumber than they are.

Anonymous · Answer

I’ve found that a lot of intelligent men like intelligent women, but they still want her there to validate HIS intelligence, not to show her own.

Aka - smart enough to understand and praise him for his insight and accomplishments, but not to share her own.

Unit1 · Answer

What do you mean by intelligent women? Knowing many random facts? Being able to solve sudoku in a short time? Fixing cars? Gardening skills? Education?

Rest assured, I'm not scared of intelligent women. Not at all.
And guess what?
I'm a man *gaaaasp* 😱😱😱😱😱
AND I'M SINGLE!
Sooo.
Would you mind answering my questions?

I always had a naughty sex fantasy of an intelligent teacher taking my virginity and introducing me to sex. I wish it could happen to me. 💗

OtherWorldWoman · Answer

I don't think so. At least, the majority of men I have been acquainted with throughout my life have the ability to appreciate intelligent women. And it goes both ways.

Ayer93 · Answer

Definitely not afraid. I need someone who can converse at my level. If they're smarter than me, even better. However, while intelligence is somewhat related to career, it is not a dependant value, so I don't really judge peoples intelligence based on their career.

GracefulCharm · Answer

Depends on the man, if a man really loves a women and considers her to be in his life, he will want a intelligent women. She may become the mother of his children one day.

If a man only purpose is to sleep with the women and leave her, then he might not like the fact she is intelligent because she might catch onto his plan.

Dinnye001 · Answer

No. I am not afraid of anybody. And I like intelligent women. But I more often than not see that people who call themselves intelligent are, in reality, bossy, hard to tolerate and the third wave feminist type.

Intelligent women know that real men are indeed seeking them and have no self-doubt about that.

Amethyst5 · Answer

Some are, of course, but most GOOD men I've known find intelligence in a woman to be a huge positive.

vishna · Answer

Some might be, but I don't think most men are afraid of intelligence in a woman; rather I think they would enjoy it if they are in it for the long haul and prefer a partner to arm candy.

MzAsh · Answer

The only ones who don’t like intelligent women are the ones who are afraid she’ll be too smart to for him and find better.

idekwhatsgoingon · Answer

Lol be a lesbian simple or pay for sex so u don't have a "tolerate" the awful, stupid, and uneducated that you seem to attract in your life. If not just die alone, it's clear no one wants you anyway just love you're and be alone

mcslumps · Answer

It is intimidating for a woman to be incredibly intelligent. But for me that's anyone. I enjoy my time with them because they usually teach me something new. If im always learning something new from that person, i begin to really like them

Astoriana · Answer

They say that they aren’t. They still don’t like it if a woman is smarter than them. Sad, really. They’re so inadequate that they can only feel good about themselves when they’re superior to other people.

Thread02 · Answer

Not true actually. But there is an effect that takes place when a guy finds a smart woman. He wants to argue and debate things.
So if the girl is only pretending to being intelectualy based, they start finghting and not debating

Anonymous · Answer

Nope.

The only way in which it becomes an issue is when it makes them arrogant or entitled. So in that way is seems like the 'men get intimidated' line is largely to rationalise rejection as 'being too good' for them in an attempt to preserve the ego.

maximuso · Answer

Intelligent* in the update.

And if they act superior, intelligent and smarter than them, then they may come off as domineering, which some guus are into. Or as bitchy, which not as many are. Attitudes are more important than smarts

And I like a girl with a Short Skirt and a Loooooooooong... Jacket

DodgersGM · Answer

Afraid isn't the right word. It's more like... unappreciative. But let's not pretend that it's just men undervaluing admirable traits in the opposite gender.

Are men afraid of intelligent women?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Are men afraid of intelligent women?

Most Helpful Opinions

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

We're glad to see you liked this post.