Is money really the most effective way to attract women?

Question

Hurt me plenty if you must but I must know the truth. It seems so obvious, yet I find a few reasons to be in denial of it.

I mean I don't blame women for seeking out the men with more cash but still, this is really disturbing.

I don't have any problems with making more money for myself (not for the women) but the thought of women starting to appear as soon as I start making a really noticeable sum or being high ranked in the job market generates quite some trust issues. Like where have these women been before I got there? How can I trust them liking me for me and not for my large positive net worth?

Am I missing something or am I getting crazy again? Or am I right after all? 🤔🤔🤔
How will I know?

Note, that I don't think of women as gold diggers. I don't say that. No more. My MGTOW days are in the past and it will stay this way.

englisc · Accepted Answer

No it's not. It's almost always a factor, especially for a woman looking for a long-term relationship/marriage and to start a family. However most guys who come up with this idea only do so because they don't properly understand how attraction works.

Think about this: statistically 66% of women have had casual sex, whether that means a one night stand or a casual "friends with benefits" type relationship. Do you think they did that because the guy had a lot of money? That doesn't make sense if you really think about it. What's the reason a woman goes with a man who has money? Because she can benefit from the lifestyle he can provide her with long term. She isn't going to benefit from that in a casual relationship or a one night stand. Most guys aren't gonna spend a lot of money on such a girl either - if they really wanted to use money to get quick sex they'd hire a prostitute. So all that is is two people who are sexually attracted to each other and horny ending up in some casual situation, where each of them is in it only for the sex.

Usually if a woman is going to have casual sex and settle down later on, she's gonna choose different guys with different characteristics, who offer her different things. The last part of that sentence is key to understanding how it works.

What does the man she has casual sex have to offer her? Why does she do that with him? She usually finds him to be very sexually attractive, and he basically only offers her a good time, excitement, good sex. What does the man with money have to offer her? His provision.

Very often one of them has certain qualities which the other one lacks. The casual guy, while he's really hot and exciting to her, usually isn't stable boyfriend material. He might not even have a lot of money. But the sex and the time she spends with him is enough fun that she's willing to go along with it despite him not being a provider. The money guy, while he has a lot of money and can provide her with nice things, usually isn't as sexually exciting to her as the other guy. But he earns good enough money that she's willing to get with him and "give" him sex.

Some women say that they date bad boys and marry nice guys, that's what that is. Red pill guys talk about "alpha fucks beta bucks". PUAs talk about "lover" vs "provider". It's all the same idea. With one type of guy she'll be strongly sexually attracted to him but won't settle down with him because he isn't boyfriend material, with the other she'll settle for him despite being less attracted to him because he has money. Ever hear guys joke about how the sex dried up once they got married? This is why.

It isn't always as black and white, some guys can have the good qualities of both. I'm just speaking about this to make the point that it's about what you have to offer. The guys who think that it's all about money are guys who aren't very sexually attractive, and either have to use their money to get women or, because they have no money, assume that the reason they can't get laid is because they don't have enough money. When really it's because they're not sexually attractive and/or have a boring personality.

GoodManDave · Accepted Answer

I think a part of the trick is that if you do make lots of cash, you have to be smart about handling it.

Unfortunately, while money shouldn’t be everything, most don’t live by that statement. The obsession to “keep up with the Jones’s” is now “beat the Jones’s.”

Money is a factor in attracting women. Anyone telling you differently is lying. But that doesn’t mean you will end up living with a gold digger. And it isn’t the same across the board.

You COULD argue it’s often the main factor in attracting ANYONE, just as sex, a roof over the head, and having food can be vital. But there are other things than money that will attract a woman. Appearance, confidence, steady income. Height. Handiness. Making something work for you to “rock it.” Money contributes to that, but some people can do a lot with only a little. So earning millions isn’t necessary, unless you’re looking for a woman obsessed with that. But I would say that that’s not most women.

If you’re smelly all the time, live out of your car (and it looks like it), and you look like you’ve given up, that will be more likely to hurt your chances. If you earn $32,000 a year, keep a decent apartment, don’t overspend, and know how to dress halfway decently, and you work the stock market well, and have a decent sounding job, you might do ok. If you earn $60,000, keep a crappy apartment, never go out, act real cheap, never dress up, you probably won’t attract the same women, even with the better income than if you rocked it while earning only $32,000.

SueAnon84 · Accepted Answer

No! This definitely wasn't one of the reasons that I was engaged to my ex! And he by the way, he didn't become my ex because of a lack of money either! It was deep down something else! I don't feel too comfortable devling into my private life (particularily my love life) on here though. Money is very important to have unfortunately/fortunately in this culture (in this world we live in!) and I know it didn't used to be that way! But that's how it is! It's not like you can or have the power to change the rules! But like I said, I fell in love (and yes I was STILL very much in love with him when I had to make one of the hardest decisions in my life!)... so don't you go generalizing on me or a lot of other women! That's just not fair!

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

No. I recently rejected a man who gave me flowers and wanted to take me to fancy places and even offered to get me a car because he knew I need one... I just thought he was insane and took it as an insult that he seemed to think he could buy me like that. Just be a decent human being instead. Men who need to throw money on a woman to get her attention is nothing to have. I can make my own money.

Shutupman · Answer

I’d say C because someone being completely broke is a red flag to me. Are they immature? Not mentally stable enough to keep a job? Don’t care about their future? No ambitions? Are they financially irresponsible?

Someone being wealthy is not what would attract me to them, if they worked hard for it that would be attractive because that shows drive, dedication and hard work.

Also because those are the traits I posses and I am financially free to do things my way.

Most women I’ve known don’t care about it either, as long as a man is passionate, has a drive in life and isn’t broke.

So no most women won’t care too much about how much a mans got and if they do they are gold diggers.

jennifer_bloom · Answer

One of the worst things you could do is date a woman who doesn't respect you or care about you and is just using you for your income. My dad married a gold digger and she made my life and my dad's life a living hell.

shimmeryns · Answer

No, not really. Unless if you're a billionaire then it should be a problem in determining whether she's into you or exclusively your net worth.

If you have a decent income, its good enough for many women. But obviously it is not the only factor in attracting women.

I keep wondering -- have you try to at least see if you get matches on dating app for a start? I don't recommend hooking up or anything but just to see how women in your area think of you.

OlderAndWiser · Answer

Some men believe this and they are usually the MGTOW crowd, a small but vocal minority. Your point is valid with respect to gold diggers and sugar babies but, fortunately, they are a small minority of women. Of course, if a woman is wanting to find a partner to be the father of her children, she wants someone who can support a family. . . and if she wants children, why would she go forward with someone who cannot afford to have children?

SomeGuyCalledTom · Answer

Biology doesn't recognise money. A woman can't feel physical attraction for a bank balance. But money does allow a man to provide a certain standard of living, and depending on the standard a woman grew up accustomed to, she'll most likely want to at least maintain the established standard. Of course, there are exceptions where middle class women date working class men, etc. (think of the whole love story in James Cameron's 'Titanic'). Money is like a "quick glance" assessment of the likelihood that a man can provide a given standard of living. But it's not the determining mechanism for visceral sexual attraction. You can have all the money in the world, but if you're boorish and sexually dissatisfying, then most women would drop you in favour of a working class man who gives them the emotional and sexual fulfilment they crave.

Bandit74 · Answer

It probably helps but I think being physically attractive is the best way to attract women. Being wealthy might get women interested in you but their primary motive won't be to fuck you. It will likely be to get free meals at fancy restraunts, receive expensive gifts, or achieve a higher quality of life for themselves anf their offspring.

If you want to be the type of guy women want to have one night stands and casual flings with then your best bet is being physically attractive. If you want to be the guy they look to settle down, raise a family with and probably divorce then being wealthy is better.

cth96190 · Answer

Women are hard wired to seek resources.
This is to improve the survival prospects of themselves and their offspring.
The hard wiring is the result of millions of years of natural selection.
Therefore, for a female to be drawn to resources is normal, natural and right.
When I want to watch a waitress or shop assistant wet her panty, I pay with my black American Express card. 🤣

sp33d · Answer

Don't paint all women with the same brush, brah.

"Like where have these women been before I got there?"
Dude, I hear ya, but look at this way: you likely weren't known before all so and so happened to you. Sometimes, it's obvious, when a woman is in it for the money. That would likely happen when you both knew one another and she gave you the cold shoulder. No worries, now you can give her the cold shoulder and be a bitch about it, totally up to you. I won't judge.

I'd say, you won't have to advertise your wealth. Money is something that helps you to not have to put up a cardboard box at the side street as a bed.

sophie2002 · Answer

Well depends. I don't need a rich person or anything to be with them. But money is always needed. My first boyfriend didn't even have money to buy himself data to text me. He would follow me in the bus everyday to talk to me. And i always had to call him. Both sides need to have enough money to equalify them selves and none of them feel lower or higher.

Anonymous · Answer

Just like looks are the best way to get a man. All these girls getting surgeries left and right and men drooling over the fake girls that say they’re “natural” while dissing the actual natural ones cause you preferred the fake lashed girl with plumped up lips and giant boobs.

Yeah, that’s how most of us see a secure future with good income! We care about how a family will be raised with children that hasn’t a good future, rather than how good your ass looks.

DeathRowKingPin · Answer

Woman go after money? Well no crap it’s been that way since high school in the 50s they have no other thing since laws made it that way. We can’t do any primal things anymore lol
One you can be sure of when money’s gone not only is she gone but the friends you thought you had around
Get and tell him or her PRENUP from day one and then you’ll know if they’re truly there for you. And goto places and drive a crap car or truck. That’s how I did it and been with her for 45 years and yes she signed the prenup before we married

purple4ever · Answer

I want my man to have money so that I feel secure in him being able to provide for our future and our babies, no money no security and i do work for myself I'm just saying that a pregnant woman can't work because her job is to take care of the born to be. I also look for thick eyebrows, sense if humor, brains and family values

MyLastRemnant · Answer

If you use money as you're primary factor in attracting women then you're only going to get golddiggers. You can't have the mind set that money is the only thing women want, since there are plenty of girls put there who think of money as an added bonus to an already amazing man. You should stay away from the ones who think money is the primary reason to get with you.

PinkMichae · Answer

It depends on the woman. For me I wasn't a factor. Both the men I've had long term relationships with started with low paying jobs. As long as we could both survive I was fine. But no doubt some women are higher maintenance and want that fancy lifestyle. And some want you to make as much as they do.

menina · Answer

I think it depends on the woman. There are women who like to depend on men, they expect men to work for them, so these women are only attracted to money.
But, there are also women who like to make their own money, so they don't care about how wealthy a man is.

muliebrity · Answer

All people are attracted to money. Would a guy not want to date a girl with money? The problem isn't the wanting its the motive. So everyone get in with the correct thoughts.

I would need my partner to have his own money just as much as I do for myself. Simply it doubles the power to overcome obstacles. Money alone doesn't attract me. However, there are those basic women who need the man's money more than him. Do i feel bad for those men? No. Some of them want it irregardless if its genuine.

AlphaGhost · Answer

It may not be the only factor but its like "force multiplier" and it increases your dating pool dramatically with all sort of trash lurking in shadows to use you for it... that's why I use always lie about about my stack and show normal-little bit high to attract stable loyal woman.
I end up getting the one equal to my standard in everything and even better in somethings like cooking !

ClosetHoe · Answer

Depends on the woman. For me, If he knows how to spend his money responsibly then it's attractive. I don't want to be with someone who can't pay his half of the bills and just wastes his money on stuff he doesn't need. I want to be spoiled with love not materialistic things.

Anonymous · Answer

Unfortunately my mother was a massive gold digger who was willing to spread her legs out for any guy she thought had money. She would chase after doctors all the time even though she hardly worked a day in her life except minimum wage low paying jobs. She was one of the type of women to be around and always got mad when I called her out on being a gold digger. The screwed up part she never saved or invested any money she had earned. This was one of the many reasons why I still despise her to this day

FakeName123 · Answer

Public social status is the easiest way to attract women as in many women no matter the personality and whatnot.
Having a lot of money is a simply way to present social status publicly.

That being said - the women you attract solely through money will obviously be very shallow.

Is money really the most effective way to attract women?

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