Confused. Please help me with Timid, shy, indecisive new girlfriend.

[COOP2332]

Ive been seeing this girl who I really like. I'm pretty certain that she really likes me too. Anyway, She refuses to take the lead on anything. Like when we last went out I know she is a really picky eater so I asked her what she wanted to eat it went something like this

"i don't know, it doesn't matter" ok so do you like this this this?

"umm it doesn't matter" ok, do you like pizza?

sure.

So she barely eats anything (I don't have a problem with that I just feel bad that she didn't like it)

After that I asked her what she wanted to do and eventually ended up at the mall (I wanted to get to know what kind of stuff she likes, colors, patterns, things like that)

So we walk around for awhile and go to a few stores I pick out, nothing exciting. I ask her if there's any stores she likes here and after some persuading she tells me that she likes a lot of them but doesn't like dragging people around nor does she like to window shop at places she can't afford. After more persuading I got her to look at the map and she said she knew where she wanted to go, but wouldn't tell me where, just that it was a couple stores on the second floor. So we walk to the end of the mall and I said "so where did you want to go" oh, I don't remember is her response. At that point I was just like fine, if she wants to be that way ill let her. The rest of the date was a disaster and ended up with me taking the longest way possible back to her house.

I probably took it the wrong way but I felt like she didn't want me to get to know her, which hurt a little. I think the reason why she didn't want to show me the stores she liked was because she didn't want me to buy her something (she thinks I have more money that I do). I also think she's afraid to show who she really is because she thinks I won't like her.

I think I might be her first boyfriend, she doesn't have many friends (self confessed lack of social life), works at the library, and is really timid and awkward sometimes. Acts somewhat flirty sometimes. Anyway I really like her and am just looking for some insight as to why she's acting like this.

[tex151]

Welcome to world of women my friend, you not alone almost all girls are like this. This is what I do I say jokingly is this place good to eat and if she says she doesn't care or idk, then I say well it doesn't matter what you want that's where we are going, don't yell this just say it in a joking type of voice, and she will go ok. No matter where you go she will find something to eat, women hate making decisions especially when it comes to eating.

Second when you went to the mall to go shopping with her, instead of following her around to all the stores, you should have said well I am going to over here to see if they have anything I would want to buy, a new shirt or something, then she would have gone her stores and you go to yours, if you both go to the same store, don't follow her like a puppy you shop at the guys side and she goes to the girls side simple as that, then when your done find her and say hey did you find anything? If she says no then say well are you ready or hey maybe you can help me pick a new shirt what color do you think would look good on me? Yes it's really that simple, just remember your the guy the guy makes the decisions.

[oceanandatlantic]

I think you should definitely let her know that you're under the impression that she's pushing you away. Ask her about it. But don't forget to add that next time you want to get food, it's completely up to her. Don't take no for an answer. She'll love that, even though she seems really timid (I would know, I'm somewhat the same way). Let her know that she can be herself and feel comfortable around you through your actions. :) Just be kind, courteous and fun.