Are women worth the effort you have to make just to be seen as attractive?

[Anonymous]

You have to do a lot just to try & attract them. After a while it's just mentally exhausting. Starting to question it

[HighlyVolatile]

I sometimes wonder if my wife met me as an awkward teen -- absent any real skills to charm women -- if she would have even given me a chance. I often think she wouldn't. I had to jam an emergency stop button on an elevator and kiss her to win her over.

She's great but who on earth would give that awkward teenage self of me a chance? That's asking a lot. So I had my ups and downs dating women until I met her but I kept the skills. I grew the skills. And eventually, it was worth it in my case because I got her in the end. But let's say I didn't meet her. Skills remain.

If you're growing in skill I don't think you question the effort so much. If you are becoming a better musician from practicing music, I don't think it's worth questioning whether it was worth it becoming good at music even if you don't get a record label. Becoming good at music is its own reward.

[clampfan101]

Yes because I don’t put any agonizing amount of effort in trying to be attractive physically. I want a girl who wants me for me.

[Asker]

You know that who love me for who i am is horseshit right?

[clampfan101]

It’s not.

[Asker]

Man you're holding onto to a lie to help you cope

[clampfan101]

I’m not saying looks are meaningless. I’m saying they’re not nearly as important as the inside.

[Asker]

Keep coping dude

[clampfan101]

Keep being a single-minded jerk, kid.

[Asker]

And keep living in that blue pilled mindset. Im sure it will help you

[clampfan101]

If you think I’m the one holding the blue pill, you’re obviously colorblind. Looks are not everything, and should never be seen as most important, as many mature people have known their entire life.

[Asker]

"Looks are not everything" yup you're definitely blue pilled

[clampfan101]

If you only care about looks, you’re not loving anyone.

[Asker]

didn't say personality didn't matter. But you're delusional if you think a person can love you for who you are. It will always be conditional. love is conditional