Why do girls use signals if guys don't understand them. Why play games?

Question

CaptainOverthink · Accepted Answer

Correct me if I am wrong but if I may assume..

- Being nuanced is a sign of social intelligence. It has a lot to do with intuition and also has a connection to emotional intelligence.
It is 50/50 nature/nurture, meaning most guys have it too but it has to do with balancing trust in intuition and testing rationally how right/wrong you are about your conclusions. Of course you also have to pay attention.

- I think women have statistical dominance on the emotional intelligence front so that may be one contributing factor to why men generally are more confused.

But I should also add that I myself am not proficient in this. I can understand (I think) it but so far I lack the confidence to respond.
It has also been increasingly difficult in my youth (20s) to learn this because the way to learn is to risk being wrong.
The wrong outcomes could be risky things like for example:
- Going for a kiss at the wrong time.
- Assuming intentions.

And while it has been like this for thousands of years, recently it has become a much greater risk because I guess society don't see that for boys to become men they need to have some wiggleroom to improve.

But it is also a problem of technology as we spend so much time online and on our phones/devices, inhibiting social skills like learning to read bodylanguage, facial expression and voice intonation.

t-8900 · Accepted Answer

Don't play the game. I never did and never will. It's a maturity thing imho. They aren't that serious about a relationship. If you want something in life you take it, that simple. She starts to play games and I'm gone, period, end of story. It feels like I'm back in elementary school with some of these girls
That's literally why I opted for dating older. A girl that doesn't waste time because she's at a place she literally can't. by the way I will say it's worked very well for me. My girlfriend is awesome, treats me with respect, loves the hell out of me, doesn't make me pay for everything, enjoys my time, recognizes and thanks me for my efforts. Also she never spent her youth sleeping around, which earned my respect. Well there are a lot of things about her and her past that won me over tbh. I greatly respect her as a woman and an adult. Let's just say that because I took my shot with her I've been greatly rewarded in ways that younger girls just can't get. She was also not born in the states and never embraced leftist ideology. She's a free thinker and a moderate. It's very refreshing. She's the first girl to treat me right for sure. She sees me as a prize and she's helped me to see I am one. She makes me feel like a real champion!

WhatTheHeckkkk · Accepted Answer

Because they are unaware that you don’t understand them. A lot of women have trouble being more direct when it comes to things, so they use nonverbal ways of communicating, hoping you pick up on them.

Some of these signals aren’t very hard to pickup on or read, but maybe their actions and words don’t always match. Some women like to “play hard to get” which sends mixed signals, but just ignore them or ask for clarification…

Some women aren’t intentionally trying to play games, but are rather conflicted in their own feelings which causes mixed signals and feeling like they’re playing games. Just ask for clarification, ask what their intentions are, and where they stand… That’s all you can do to really try and understand them.

Women are hard to understand at times, but men have a hard time picking up on nonverbal cues as well lol. It’s equally hard. Being direct is the best way to eliminate confusion, mixed signals, and game playing.

Emiliamazing · Accepted Answer

Everybody has their own opinion on what the signals are. I’m guessing every individual person, both genders don’t even realize they’re sending signals at times. A look, a smile, or even the way one dresses can be considered signals. I agree with keeping it simple and direct. The challenging part with being overtly obvious is that some people aren’t looking for more than a short one-sided relationship, so nobody really wants to open themselves up for that if they’re looking for long-term.
The vague flirty signals, prevent the individual from throwing all their cards in at once so to speak.

virtue2332 · Answer

It's a fact the reason we fail to communicate effectively and properly is because we were taught incorrectly. Girls that use signals could be under the impression that it's innappropriate for females to be direct or they could come off as being easy. Maybe they were told that it was important for the man to pursue her. Now that we all have ways to communicate to a much broader range of people with different ideas these old ways and thoughts should be abandoned. Our most precious and valuable resources is limited and not renewable. So we have to figure out how to get more efficient at using time and not waste it playing games.

ManOnFire · Answer

Women who use signals aren't confident in their ability to communicate and are underdeveloped in communication. They are also the same ones who will blame guys for why their relationships didn't work out because "you didn't read the signs." And these women are more likely to be ghosters because they fail to communicate directly with a man and blame this failure on the men they ghost.

I think what's even worse is the women who make excuses for this kind of behavior and want to side with it as what they feel is their female nature.

AviatorTom · Answer

Funny story: Back in college, there was this cute girl who happened to be in a couple of my classes. Every time she looked at me she would rub her hair. Now, I was told back then that a girl rubbing her hair was a sign that she was interested in you. So, one day I got up the courage to ask her out. Her response was not what I expected, "Get lost creep." I later found out that she "preferred girls" and was rubbing her hair because she had a bad case of dandruff.

So much for "signals".

Sparks32 · Answer

Women's brains or feminized brains are better at reading body language then men's Science has proven that. I have a couple of abilities reflected in IQ tests with high results in those areas and I honesty thought that because I found these tasks easy I assumed that everyone else also did, but I was wrong. This is what I think is the case with women. Women find reading body language easy and so they assume that the average man does too, But that is wrong. This has been reflected in IQ like tests comparing the average man and woman.

TDDMS · Answer

I've never had a problem understanding body language of East Asian women, they make it quite clear when they are/aren't interested in me. I've encountered many issues with American women. For instance, I had one woman say 'hi' to me at the start of a business meeting, only to find out later that was her way of hitting on me. I've found over the last 20 years that American women have the market cornered on social and sexual retardation. And with that said, MGTOWs are closeted gay retards who, in about, 2 years will be butt fucking each other.

Kaamraj · Answer

Men and women communicate very differently. Men communicate directly while women indirectly. The benefit of indirect communication is plausible deniability, that a message or sign can be disowned later saying that it was misunderstood. And some if not most women enjoy men fumble over deciphering these messages which gives them a perceived sense of value. The only solution for men is don't play these games. If you really want sex than there are other more sure shot options.

Anonymous · Answer

I don’t think women play hard to get or use signals and whatever.
I think women show their intentions but they don’t see the results. So they step back and it might seem like they don’t care and are starting to use signals.
So communication is very important. If you are a Guy and you think the girl you like or showed any interest isn’t reacting much or is only using signals ask her why what’s wrong? Same for girls too.. ask talk.

We poop and pee daily you won’t lose your reputation if you ask a straightforward question.

omnivert · Answer

Because its our ancestors take them and its been not changed and became a part of our DNA. So we men are doomed.

I accepted it anyway cause we men like to find things. If its easy, we ignore from inside. But outside we are what we want.

Its a honest reply.

But yes if men mature, they became to be the best signal receivers.
And being mature is not a choice, its our education of life.

So if a girl uses signal is because she believes you are that nature to find it out.

I love girls for their honesty.

Anonymous · Answer

Women need to step up their game and approach men. Its 2022. With all of the high value men out there these days; men that are building wealth; men that are building their bodies; men that are building their businesses; men who have elevated their social lives; the point is, men are more valuable in this day and age than ever before.

A high value man is on his purpose, not prioritizing vague signals he may or may not be receiving from the checkout girl at the supermarket. This guy is trying to build his empire and you expect him to notice the 2 and a half seconds of eye contact you gave him? C mon.

If your a 22 year old girl and are interested in that hot 35 year old guy? Ask him out. he's the guy. If he's interested, he's likely to still take the lead and plan the date himself and show you a good time.

FrenchGirl2 · Answer

It's not that we play games or play hard to get or whatever. We just "test the water" if the guy responds positively to the signs yes some girls will wait but some will gather all of their courage and go straight and ask. It's not to play with your minds and all

MrCommodore · Answer

Women do show subtle signs of interest or attraction to a guy they like, and in most cases the guy does recognise these signs and just isn't confident or sure whether it is a genuine sign or not.

The fear of getting it wrong is powerful, few are comfortable with it being public knowledge of whom they like. I don't think its women playing games, they just don't want to be too open until they know how he feels.

Anonymous · Answer

This is only happen in backwarded countries/cities in which being easy or slutshaming is a huge thing. If you Stop calling women easy for not "trying to get hard" or sleeping on the first date or sleeping before marriage, then all of this would not happen. These women dont act like this out of nowhere without any reason to annoy guys. They adapt in to survive in this society. They have their reasons and know how they get treated if they dont do that. Yes women ain't perfect and so do stupid shit sometimes, so do men because we are humans. But certain things are like this because of the society which affect both men and women in a bad way.

Xoxocutekitty · Answer

Is a joke funny if you have to explain the punch line?

If a man is too dense to look for prolonged eye contact, arm touching, playing with her hair, suggesting he invite her somewhere, he wouldn't even survive a real relationship.

If a woman has to explain to a man why he should take her out on a date, then she's working to hard to convince him to be interested. She's already killed the chase.

globetrotter22 · Answer

It’s because their brains are structured and society tells them that being flaky and sending mixed messages is okay.

The problem I have is that modern society continues to slap men hard to behave the way women want them to. Yet society not only ignorances but embraces problematic female behavior.

Mamaganja · Answer

I know what you mean but from my perspective, if I’m being hit on, I say my thanks and keep it moving. You know that women are killed for turning men down?

I’m celibate. Have been since 2020. Just because someone wants to date me doesn’t mean I’m going to. I let them know I’m celibate and am not interested in dating but “appreciate” the flattery just so y’know, I’m not killed.

dustybiker · Answer

Woman do that when they are too afraid to outright speak their minds. Same as men.  Everyone is so damn afraid to talk to one another anymore. Need something? Speak up.

Anonymous · Answer

It is not necessarily playing games by only using signals, so I will not answer that part.
But I don't see the problem for youself. If you are direct and ask out a girl, she should also be direct back. If she is vague then take it as a no, the girl will hopefully learn to be direct if she really is interested.

Anonymous · Answer

Their way of communication is covert while ours is overt. You have to learn womanese in order to speak to them properly. They're also more inclined to act based on their emotions while we men act more logically. So it is incumbent on any man to know how to speak on an emotional level to her.

Anonymous · Answer

Because the societal standard judges a girl if she's direct about her feeling with a guy and if she makes a first move. So girls give signals while if a guy likes her at least will understand her signal and move forward with it by making a first move on her. But if a girl doesn't like a girl, he don't need to understand her as understanding her only will let him break her heart. So no girls put their hearts on sleeves for a guy who likely rejects her

TransAm85 · Answer

Kids today will nvr know b/c they aren't learning social interactions. They live on their phones. A "selfie" can say 1000's words! lol

Twalli · Answer

I think that since other girls easily understand signals that they believe that signals are understood universally. Luckily the girls that I am friends with are as bad at giving and understanding signals as I am. Therefore they don't really give signals. My girlfriend made it painfully obvious to EVERYONE that she liked me when she made out with me. I obviously wanted that as I had a major crush on her, but that wasn't exactly what you'd call a signal.

Guanfei · Answer

Women need to understand that not only we're bad at getting signals, but we also don't care about it.
We're straightforward, if you like me, tell me and boom, we're together, or we're not, but you'll have your answer immediately.
It's as simple as that. TELL US. BE CLEAR.

cookiecrusher · Answer

Even women don't understand signals coming from a guy. I guess we humans aren't very good at reading minds.

A lot of women like to "shoot their shot" without actually doing anything, the less the better. So there would be no risk involved for them, of they "get rejected". "Oh i wasn't even doing anything"

The thing is, nothing is more fragile than a womans image/ego. 😗

Anonymous · Answer

I remember when my ex told me I should have known how she felt about something by her “eyes.”

So when she said it was cool for me to go out she was really lying. She instead held me against me and said it was proof that I didn’t “understand” her.

Fucking women and their signals and body language. Use your goddamn mouths and speak.

Anonymous · Answer

Screening. They use signals and put up shit tests that weed out the weak guys they don't want. The goal is to set up a system that only the worthy guys they want to get with would get through and all the sad-sack losers they want to weed out will get screened out. Understanding this is absolutely critical to having success with women.

JSmuve · Answer

Because they're scared of rejection or looking easy/desperate.

ZackBan · Answer

It's a way to weed out the dense and dumb ones.  Women keep looking until they find the guy that is socially entuned enough to see through their bullshit and that guy is the guy they fall for.

neonpetals19 · Answer

not me, I am not unattractive but I am not the most beautiful girl either. I think men are like rabbits. One wrong move and it's over.

So I detach myself, keep it short and hide how I feel and not tell them anything until they take initiative themselves. it's a bit unfair that men could get away with it but if we take initiatives we are seen as needy

oh well

Subarugirl · Answer

It's called body language... and it's an important social skill. Many men are able to pick up on body language, it requires them perceptive and to think with their brain and not their balls.

MCheetah · Answer

Other: They're too chicken to be upfront and direct, let alone do all the heavy lifting in courtship.

Slartybartfast · Answer

Hints, ambiguity, lack of communication, unrealistic expectations. Middle school thinking.  Black flags, Red flags, semaphore isn't supposed to be the language of love..

lightbulb27 · Answer

What else are they supposed to do? They aren’t generally the agressor… they want to be pursued. Hormonal differrnces

CubsterShura · Answer

Because if we are direct you will call us desperate.

Anonymous · Answer

They don't actually want the man but like to taunt them because they like games to see if they can "get with an ugly guy". Like the prankster kids who don't really hate old people but they still egg their houses. Only go for the ones who are straight with you and show they want you, ignore the time wasters and gold diggers

Star_88 · Answer

Because it's not a signal, it's a CLEAR message that we are interested. Admit that you expect us to say those 3 magical words loudly, lol.

JamesDiaz11 · Answer

Just because guys don’t always understand them doesn’t mean we never do. Before words there was communication between us.

Kkstarzz96 · Answer

What signals? I send dudes an essay of what I mean because of said signals so either way you just don't understand I guess lol

OneManOnly01 · Answer

Guys do too. That’s how you flirt. Flirting it supposed to be subtle otherwise it wouldn’t be fun anymore

Anonymous · Answer

It's how they get you to do what they want, without directly asking, and thus maintaining the ability to deny that's what they wanted... and so they don't owe you anything in return for the effort you put in to make them happy.

John_Doesnt · Answer

Because women are terrible at games. Have you seen the way they play board games? Women actually read the rules and try to win, but board games are about pretending to be a pirate or a space man.

IveGotNoName · Answer

Because always having to spell things out for you guys is kind of exhausting.

Paul09 · Answer

I don't know! Like say what's on your mind. Stop making is seen like non readers. Heck they are adults, they can use words too... But choose not to, because society.. I can't even get dates anymore, so stressing to try to find one, wherever they are.

Hairylegs222 · Answer

A woman is an emotional mind game. Expect it when interacting with women. The more immature she is, the worse this behavior becomes.

Anonymous · Answer

Because the point is for them to avoid taking any initiative themselves. If a guy doesn’t get it then they’ll sooner just a random their interest rather than take action and they’ll just keep doing the same shit with someone new.

fonduegirl · Answer

Hey, if you can't read the signals right, you don't deserve me at all

libsaretards · Answer

Some of it is biology and some of it is Hollywood bullshit that got into their head.

Uptowngirl88 · Answer

If u know its a signal you obviously get it yet refuse to accept you're being rejected. No one owes an explanation

KAT247 · Answer

Everyone should be more direct.

This_Is_My_Opinion8 · Answer

They are afraid of being hurt and this is their way if shooting their shot without putting themselves in a vulnerable position.

bamesjond0069 · Answer

Because its legit mental retardation. Just pat their pretty little heads and say good girl and pretend to listen when they talk. Thats all i do and it generally works.

CallmeTheKnight · Answer

They don't like the idea of being rejected if they make the approach. They play it safe

TheSpaceGnome · Answer

I dunno but it's dumb, very blunt but bubbly women are the best in my opinion.

scott04sa22 · Answer

if she plays hard to get then she's not interested period!

SAMI_DABBAB · Answer

Because when guys do understand they'll know they're the one

one1wild00 · Answer

And if on the off chance we figure the rules out, they will just go and change them.

Jltakk · Answer

The gameification of dating is cancerous, I agree. a lot would be avoided if people were more clear and honest with their intentions.

Chthou95 · Answer

Because women are major headaches. They expect you to just know what they mean. Men are simple. Women are complicated

innerman · Answer

Girls are just cute and stubborn... they refused to upgrade from the analog age of using signs.

Kenzy009 · Answer

It way be to filter out socially inept males from the dating market

Djaay · Answer

If you dont understand her signal , it then was'nt meant for you to understand in the first place.

Why do girls use signals if guys don't understand them. Why play games?

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