I think I am invisible. It makes sense, then, that I have a pretty fake personality depending who I am talking to. I know what others want me to say or act like so I automatically put on that face a bit. Even though the real me is just silent, maybe crying inside, maybe nothingness, maybe deeper and darker and colder than a cave. Sometimes I act happier than I truly am. I smile and laugh a lot at people's jokes. I giggle at everything that isn't meant to be funny. It just doesn't really matter to anyone who I really am.
Superb Opinion
Work on developing some authentic relationships. Lots of things we do are just social conventions, such as laughing at jokes that aren't funny or being friendly to people we are apathetic toward. But you should have a group of friends and family who you should feel more real with, people you trust with your feelings and emotions.
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I know the feeling, being what you are expected to be. sometimes it gets to breakpoint then you have to work yourself through it.
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I wish I was invisible
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