Why do women ghost and/or when you know you didn’t do anything wrong?

[Anonymous]

This just seems a lot more common nowadays.

Updates

+1 y

Meant to say “ghost and/or block” in the title.

Updates

+1 y

When I talk about “not making mistakes” I am talking about never mentioning sex.

Now I did chat about sex a few times with the last girl. She seemed to really like it but I had a “let’s get honest” moment and said “hey if I ever cross the line here I want you please tell me”. She seemingly liked the open respectful /communication on that. When she ghosted me later we had talked about sex at all earlier.

However I have been ghosted despite never mentioning sex at all before.

[OlderAndWiser]

1. The fact that "you know you didn’t do anything wrong" doesn't mean that the girl thinks the same. Your perspective is always biased.

2. There are many reasons why someone might block or ghost and your misbehavior is only one of those reasons. About 7 years ago, I had a first date with a lady I met online and I thought we had instant connection/chemistry/etc. We made plans for our second date before the end of the first date and when I walked her back to her car, she gave me a passionate good night kiss. Sounds good so far, right?

The next day, she ghosted me. For her, that was easier than telling me the truth.

I later learned that she had recently broken up with a long term boyfriend, and then reconciled with him after our date. In fact, they got married about a month later, she got a domestic violence injunction against him another month later, and the divorce was filed a few weeks after that. Crazy, impulsive drama, so I actually dodged a bullet by her ghosting me.

And I did nothing wrong. It happens.

[Asker]

Not sure if you ever read Corey Wayne. But you did make a (well meaning) mistake on that first date. He had a rule to never chat with a woman about going on a second date on the first. He quoted “Talking about a future with a woman you just met guarantees you won’t have one with her.”

Anyway I’m not saying that guy is God or anything. But in retrospect there was truth in what he said. I’ve made that mistake myself. The only time it’s possible is if he she really likes you.

Anyway how old was this woman when she ghosted you? I am guessing you were 60 when you went one the date. So she was at least 35-40? Really depressing when grown ass women do this.

[OlderAndWiser]

That is probably the only time that I have done that and it felt appropriate on that occasion. In general, I don't ask a woman for a second date when we are on our first date.

She was at least 52-53 years old when all of this went down.

[Asker]

Yeah there are just some behaviors women never grow out of. She should of given you the respect of responding. But I get it.

[OlderAndWiser]

Thanks for MHO!

[Light909090]

You could Word something wrong way or send 6 text messages people get offended way to easily now a days That why people don’t reply back cause they feel no need
Like talking to a brick wall the brick wall Can be a listener but it isn’t going to respond because it feels no need too

[Guccigabbana18]

I don't ghost guys, but I admit I did in the past when I was more immature. It really is out of (surprise) immaturity, unless they are not taking no for an answer or something. But in the past, I would do it because I was too cowardly to tell him I'm not interested.

But you have to make sure the girl is actually ghosting though. Sometimes there is a miscommunication. A guy thought I ghosted him recently when I didn't, I actually thought he wasn't interested/wasn't making the effort, so I stopped contacting him.

[Asker]

There is a difference between no longer contacting someone vs. intentionally not responding/blocking. The former isn’t ghosting but the latter definitely is.

Anyway thanks for owning up to your past mistakes. If you get a “bad vibe” from a guy you are talking to first take a deep breath about it. Think carefully about what he said and/or did. Was it something fundamentally wrong or did he just remind you of a past incident? He’s a different person so you have to treat him as such. If he did do something wrong you should just politely tell him you are no longer interested. If you are scared of his response feel free to block him AFTER you say that. At least he knows where he stands.

[Guccigabbana18]

Great response, thank you!

[MoniqueTLC]

She might feel really bad or guilty for telling a guy she's not interested, lack confidence to be assertive enough to no thank you, or, she might just not value the guy enough to feel like he deserves a message, and not take other people's feelings into consideration.

It would also depend at what stage the ghosting happens. For example, if it was right after you matched on an online dating site this could literally just be because she has too many options, or something fickle like that.

[Asker]

This is someone I chatted with for a good three weeks (almost every day). I even had an honest conversation that I wanted her to communicate with me if I ever said anything she didn’t like (and vice versa). We did talk about sex a few times but not that often. Most of the time it was funny banter or talking about life’s adventures.

Then she suddenly went dark about a week ago and I think she ghosted/blocked me. All our conversation prior to that was positive.

[MoniqueTLC]

Ahhh, then it could be because:
1 - She met someone else
2 - She's no longer interested due to lack of investment
3 - Personal life can sometimes get in the way
4 - You may have said something she didn't like

[FilmGuy93]

People who ghost are doing it because they aren't comfortable with some aspect of who they are as people. There's usually a pretty major lack of self awareness.

[Avicenna]

Ghosting isn't unique to women. It can simply mean someone is a bad communicator and can't handle a confrontation or doesn't want you to turn on them since not everyone handles rejection well.

[Asker]

Yeah guys can be guilty of this too. But it seems that ghosting has become more commonplace in recent times. I do not recall this being as usual back when I was in college years ago.

[Avicenna]

Yeah, you do have a point there too. I have done it couple of times myself.

[Asker]

I can think of only one notable time I outright did this to a girl after 3 dates. I have stopped contacting girls (but would of responded if they contacted me). However only one time I outright didn’t respond. I had a pretty good reason. But in retrospect I should of responded and gave her the respect of letting know where I stood.

Just remember if a girl gets ghosted she will more likely start ghosting other innocent people vs. taking it as a lesson of what not to do. Don’t do this to people unless their a terrorist or something lol. Don’t be a hypocrite.

[Avicenna]

That's true

[Midgetmcwidget]

No idea on your circumstance, I usually ghost if a moral line has been crossed.

[msc545]

Hypergamy - they found someone richer, taller, or better-looking.

[Anonymous]

You did something creepy that scared her away. Happens to me all the time. I try to give the guy a second chance but I usually know when it's not going to get any better and I'm gone.

[Asker]

So brave you responded as anon. Brave.

[Opinion Owner]

What does that have to do with anything? This is the kind of thing that probably scared that girl away.

[Opinion Owner]

Asshole.

[Opinion Owner]

And you posted anonymously you jackass!

[Guy13]

Mostly because men don’t follow through.

[Guy13]

I’m not referencing you people who do anything besides face-face in the same Time and Location: Anything other than that is Self-Deceit: Digital Dating is Self-Delusional.

Many of these women today Risk. Flirting, poking, breaking 3 feet space rule, softest eyes ever, etc. When a woman now…Risks like that…How long before she expects you to ask her out ⁉️ How much image buildup does one require ⁉️
So, why you get ghosted: 1. Complacency, 2. Boy afraid of No, 3. Making her feeling insecure…for goodness sake the women rubbed your belly, 4. she’s thinking not pretty enough for you
BECAUSE 1. Either too cheap to let go of 75.00 and/or 2. Too insecure to man-up and ask her out. In my view, it is always best to risk too soon than too late. At least the early rejection earn some respect of in her eyes.
IF you are not interacting face-face in same Time and Place then one’s whole life will be a 👻👻👻

[msc545]

The Simp Speaks.

[Guy13]

@msc545 no that’s a model speak whose been out with women that you can only have we dreams about…that’s why your ass is single at 40 years old

[msc545]

Also, a Simp who cannot read.

[Asker]

Alright guys. @guy13 I do not agree with your comment. But I am not going to disrespect you for it. Disagree yes but not insult you for it.

Let’s everybody be cool. We are supposed to be on the same team here.

[msc545]

Guy is a Simp who tries to get laid by pandering to women.

[Anonymous]

Unpredictable they are