What is she playing at?

[Anonymous]

Can someone please help me. I'm struggling to understand what she wants from me.

So I'm gay and I have a straight best friend who is married with kids. One minute she will be completely flirting by putting stuff down my top or saying she misses me. Slapping my arse. The seductive looks she gives me. She hates it when I stay at another friends house. She gets jealous when I go out with friends. When she sees me she is all smiles

Then in the next breath she is cold as a cucumber. She is messaging like a friend would. She has taken a day off work so we can spend the day for me.

Her husband accused us of having an affair with each other. I wanted to cut contact with her as mentally I couldn't cope with it she was adoment she didn't want me to.

I'm really confused by all this. Amy advice would be great

[20yearsolder]

Honestly, when she's in one of those flirty moods, I think if you made the first move she would go for it. I think she wants to experiment with you. I think she is struggling with being bisexual.

[Asker]

Thank you. Yes I did wonder that myself. I have brought the subject up with her asking why she is flirting etc then being a friend the next. She said she didn't realise she was being flirty and just acts different around other people

[20yearsolder]

Slap her ass occasionally, stick something down her shirt. Brush your hand on her titties. See what happens

[Asker]

Thank you I will try it

[20yearsolder]

Good luck I would love an update if you do it. I'd like to know the results

[Asker]

Of course

[20yearsolder]

Much appreciated

[20yearsolder]

I was going to message you but you don't follow me

[Asker]

I do now 😄

[lickmypink216]

She sounds bi curious but afraid. If you aren't reciprocal or even put off by it she may feel denied even tho she isn't really being denied, i hope that makes sense. When people get denied they feel crappy. She can't totally feel crappy because its shown as playful boyfriend stuff but she is curious and probably just wants it to happen. Just ask her lovie

[Asker]

Thank you. I have spoke to her before about this and she said she didn't realise she was flirting and just acts differently around other people. I do feel she is struggling mentally with her sexuality and I really do. feel for her but sadly I'm the one getting hurt

[lickmypink216]

Oops i meant playful bestfriend stuff lol
How old is she? She should definitely know if its flirting or not she has a husband and kids. Its not fair she is hurting you in the process have you told her this? At the end of the day sweetie you decide whats worth it and how to proceed. If she doesn't understand or can't come to terms she will lose you and thats on her. But your feelings matter too.

[Asker]

Thank you she is 36 so should know what she doing

[lickmypink216]

36 she definitely knows better. If she is playing games whether she's confused or not this is 2022 being gay isn't an issue anymore. She has all the support to not be silly and ignorant about it im sorry you have this going on the decision can't be easy.

[Asker]

Thank you. Yes I think she is more concerned about people are going to think and she has a lot of help from her husband financially

[panamared1]

maybe she is in the closet

[Asker]

I didn't think of that. Is that why you think she is acting like a friend one min and next flirty

[panamared1]

could be

[Asker]

Thank you. I have never been in this situation before