This girl in my office had many guys vying for her attention. She is well educated and makes decent money. She could easily lead a comfortable, respected life - married or not. Suddenly she had married a guy twice her age. This man already has 2 living (and 1 dead) ex-wives and many mistresses all the world over. His eldest child is almost her age.
Why some decent girls fall for such perverted men? Do you think a decent life with a regular guy is so bad?
A guy on GAG explained it very well. However, most people, especially guys on GAG, don't want the truth. Instead, they want to believe girls are attracted to guys that mistreat them. Of course, that is false because girls are attracted to hot guys; not bad boys per se.
As explained by a guy on GAG, bad boys are athletic, smart, very good looking guys. That is, they are the popular guys that girls chase after. Girls have always been easy for popular bad boys. Therefore, girls are like sand; they have very little value. They snap their fingers and the girls come running. That are not mean; they don't mistreat girls.
Instead, they find them, feed them, have sex with them, and then leave them for the next easy and pretty lay. Of course girls don't like giving sex and being dumped so they complain, call them bad guys, and most every name in the book. However, the bad boys don't actually mistreat them. They willingly hop into bed with hot guys because they are hoping for a relationship. Regardless, the girls are angry, because the hot guys will have sex with them but are not interested in a relationship.
In contrast, nice guys are average looking guys. They are not hot so most girls are not interested. Therefore, the nice guys are usually rejected or put in the friend zone. To get a girl they must invest a lot of time (perhaps years), money, and effort. Therefore, when a nice guy finds a girl, she is precious; she is like a diamond. He wants to marry her and will treat her like she should be treated. Even so, she may dump him for the next hot guy that only wants to take her to bed.
I don't think it's that men don't want the truth.
We desperately crave the truth.
But an honest person can't help but he paralyzed between the differing perspectives on "what women want."
We are analytical and need to compare facts from differing perspectives. We don't know the truth until the data has been collected and juxtaposed.
Maybe you are telling the real truth. But it's lost in a pool of other "truths" and we really don't know which is which.
Holy shiL*t.
Now I know you are a teenager but you need to have MHO.
INFACT, someone needs to sign over this website to you. You killed it with your answer. When women want to understand why men go for young women, let them look here. Younger women tell the whole truth from their core.
God bless you and take take of yourself. I'm saving your answer
Ah this woman is marrying a 60 year old man. Unless he’s a George Clooney or something I don’t think looks came into play here. Almost any average (not ugly) looking 30 year old nice guy is probably much better looking than her new husband. Father Time takes his toll on everyone.
You said girls are attracted to hot guys, not bad guys.
Then you said hot guys treat girls like sand, valueless.
Doesn't that make every hot guy a bad guy?
You're basing bad boy/nice guys purely on looks, which doesn't surprise me since you're 13.
@Illustrator01 You could make that argument with some justification. After all, they are dealing with humans and human girls have their feelings hurt when things do go as the want. However, as I see it, they don't really mistreat girls. It's just that girls are very available and easy so they have little value except to satisfy the guys immediate desires. Girls should know when they chase after guys out of their league, the guys are not likely to want more than a short-term relationship. The girls may know that but they don't want to accept it. Therefore, they let their unrealistic hopes trump what should be their good judgement.
@KelleyNice So whose fault do you think that is? And I'm not being sarcastic.
Do you think hot guys are wrong for using women for their immediate desires? Or are women wrong in trying to date only hot guys that are out of their league?
This
How many people seriously read the details of what QA asked about. She is talking about her friend who is a grown independent woman (I am guessing around 30) deciding to marry a 60 year old Hugh Hefner type on a whim.
That is not the same as the good girl and bad boy dynamic everybody else is assuming on here. And again @kelleynice I highly doubt she married him for looks. Maybe one out of 10 million men who are 60 years old are considered very attractive to women. You got to remove the “looks” dynamic from all of the bad boy vs nice guy assumption by the way.
Also for the record good looking nice guys struggle too because I was exactly that in my late teens and early 20s (got more ruthless in my late 20s).
Anyway people just assume they are “gay” if they are having trouble with women which is deeply insulting bs. But that’s another deep debate/topic.
Typo correction ***Maybe one out of 10 million men who are 60 years old are considered very physically attractive to young women***
This guy rather is a master at emotionally manipulating women. I am guessing he is an excellent liar.
@Illustrator01 I don't know that either are wrong. If not lying or committing fraud, it is not wrong to do what is in your best interested; in this case having sex with girls. However, it may not be fair. The hot guys knows or should know he is not willing to give what the girl wants so, in a sense, he is taking advantage of her naiveté. And, I don't believe is wrong for a girl to go after a guy she wants. However, not being wrong does not imply she is using good judgment. Therefore, depending on your definition and how you look at it, you could say neither is wrong, or you could say both are wrong. Or perhaps just one is wrong. Regardless, it will not change how things are. I believe what would be best it to educate girls and women to be more realistic in their expectations; if that is possible.
@KelleyNice In other words. Women should look to date in their league.
I think that's a better and more realistic solution than expecting hot guys to stop having sex with girls.
I do not think you gave the best example above. I thought she would of fallen for some aggressive violent asshole with a criminal record or something.
How old is your friend? 30? She’s a grown women and can make her own decisions. Yeah her new husband is twice her age and not exactly a familial role model. Why she choose him is beyond anyone’s comprehension. He must be extremely good at emotionally seducing women. Is he rich?
But at the end of the day SHE made this choice (stupid or not). Yet you somehow are trying to blame him for it happening despite her agreeing and consenting to all of this. She’s no child. She knows the risks. Just want to be clear on that.
My theory is that western women have been given more privileges and opportunities in human history and ironically it makes many of them miserable.
The absolute worst state of mind women can be in isn’t fear, depression, anger, etc. No the worst state is boredom. Even if the “boredom” comes with true peace and tranquility. They yearn for excitement, drama and danger even if the risk of self destruction is very high as a result of that choice. And when these women get screwed over society is more likely to treat them like “victims”. Men who get screwed over are treated like naive chumps and losers.
My solution is to remove the safety net for women who make bad choices. Quit giving them a shoulder to cry on. Treat them the same way men get treated. You make a bad decision then you suffer the consequences. It’s on you.
When things go wrong down the road I dare you to tell her she made this decision on her own. She’s not a “victim”. She knows what she was getting into. She will need to own up to it when it happens.
Women want “equality”. Fine. You get everything that comes with it.
What men think are good catches are not the same for women. Women like proven men who want to commit. They like a diamond in the rough bad boys they can reshape to the boring men who are in abundance, because she thinks there is a little extra to him. Most bad guys are confident.
You would be shocked how many women would fall for a guy who look strong and came up to her and said I want to do you and then marry you. And then we he gets rejected he walks off and becomes more attractive because he comes off not as desparate.
A lot of guys go too easy into the friendzone. You would be shocked how a woman takes a man who will ot waste the time on her, when he presents an expectation. And to be clear, does not force her, but goes up to her, banters, and then moves on the moment she says no to her friend, or another woman.
A woman will tell you she hates men like that. But he gets under her skin and she feels like she needs to do something. And you will see if, these guys will have a line of girls following him, if you could see what his whole month looks like. Once some women see the competition, she will participate.
sounds like the guy she fell for is an irresponsible fellow. it's different from a bad guy who smokes and drinks and clubs and probably doesn't hesitate to dish out a slap or spank when feeling provoked.
And to answer your questions, girls, even the most classy looking ones that look like Beyonce, Rihanna or Taylor swift are not as confident as they look. Most are looking for validation and like that air of danger and confidence.
I've heard some of my friends say "I want a guy who can put me in my place" or "I want a guy who can keep mee in line." blah blah. and Rihanna once said "I cannot be with a guy who is intimidated by me."
Im not speaking for all women but majority are this way, from a well respected Queen to a servant girl. All want a man that can lead.
And yet feminists keep pushing and pushing to brainwash men into thinking the opposite is true. They want to set up men for failure.
@RangerBlue22 most feminists are hypocrites.
^^^^ yes and thank you. But why is it they often get their way and worse manage to brainwash so many kids via public education and entertainment? Why do they have so much influence?
It’s all a huge shit test. Men are not born equipped to understand this crap either. We have to learn the hard way.
@RangerBlue22 that's cause men allow it. I really don't understand feminists agenda. for me, there should be balance in a relationship. the man should lead but that don't mean the woman can't have input. everything should just be done with love.
It has to with old school chivalry being exploited. Most men are inherently respectful and protecting of women.
Also through advancements in technology (that men invented) feminists have a platform to bitch on. If radio, TV, internet never existed than all this crap would never exist. Men have also created a automated society that no longer requires as much hard labor to survive. So this gives more job opportunities to women.
In theory that’s a good thing. But feminists have just assumed it was through “progress of women” they were able to gain power and influence. No that’s all an illusion. It is because sympathetic men and technology that they have gained any so called “power”. If men collectively decided to take all their power back then within 3 months the vast majority women would be back in kitchens.
Now I don’t want to that to happen. BUT it’s just the fact that feminists conveniently forget that it’s because of men that women have become “liberated”. Women didn’t and couldn’t of done it by themselves. But instead feminism just delusionally doubles down on blaming men.
@RangerBlue22 you've hit the nail on the head.
@Gloree you are seeing an uptick in many angry, depressed and delusional western men (e. g. “incels”).
It’s easy to dismiss these men as pathetic and to tell them to “man up”. But the truth is most of them would of been happily married in a different time era. Not to give them a cop out but the truth is women don’t know how to use all this new found freedom. It ironically depresses them but they gaslight/double down on hating men. They keep trying to do mental gymnastics.
Then more and more are angry, depressed and hopeless. They are responding back to a society that is trying to set them up to fail.
I’ve tried to not be that incel type and remain optimistic. But I was definitely one of those “nice guys” when I was younger and was absolutely raked over the coals for it. It’s not an easy thing to remedy when you have to do behave in an opposite manner vs how you were raised and taught in your youth.
@RangerBlue22 I'm glad you liberated yourself. Nature fights back quietly when the balance is offset. I rejected many guys by testing them. imagine when everything you say is okay. he nods and says fine. but the guy I'm marrying is far from that. that's one of the reasons I fell for him. Keep being yourself. There's this book called Dark love written by Pen Glowy. it has two chapters. if you see the number of readers reading it. they are predominantly women. that says a lot about how a guy needs to be loving but strong, decisive and confident.
@Gloree nobody is teaching young boys about how girls shit test. In fact nobody is really even teaching boys what women REALLY want including their own mothers (that’s the saddest part of all).
Men think logically so shit testing is counterintuitive for us to begin with. We take things at face value that’s pretty much how the rest of the world works. Only a very small percent (3% at most) naturally get this.
I also think most women have no idea how dating really is for most guys. They think dating for their male equivalents is the same way as it is for them. Nothing could be further from the truth.
Opinion
35Opinion
Many women, even the most accomplished, often suffer from self confidence issues. Bad boys appear strong because they tend to have extremely high levels of confidence.
Because bad guys bad boys have the confidence they want in a man. Period.
He's probably handsome, likely lives a high lifestyle, and the chaos he causes makes him seem "exciting" (because danger is exciting, right up until it starts threatening you). Good men are reliable, stable, trustworthy, and predictable - which most women see as boring. They also don't tend to life a lifestyle that could be mistaken for that of an Instagram influencer.
Of course, at the beginning, it will be exciting and there will be butterflies in the tummy, but 2 years down the road, the butterflies will be long gone and she will probably be miserable.
This is what happens when you make relationship decisions like a teenager based on nothing but your feelings in the moment, and not taking into consideration anything longterm.
a.) It's the best they can get given their personality/character. You see, guys don't take a woman seriously just because she looks good. She can get all the sex she wants but being taken seriously is much more difficult.
b.) She's convinced herself it isn't important to find a good guy right now. Not realizing that it gets harder to find him the more baggage (bad relationships/experiences) & mileage she collects.
c.) She wants to act like a man, not realizing that it is repulsive to quality dudes. Look up "masculine energy".
If she is past 30 she has much less options, especially when it comes to good high quality guys. Also it is a mistake to think a high income will attract a good guy. Most good guys that are not lazy are not impressed in the slightest with a woman's income.
The truth. Many of the "bad men" have confidence, even if it does derive from ego and lack of self-awareness. So they pursue women and ask them out.
Whereas many of the "good men" out there are doubting themselves or too shy to make a move; they're too afraid of rejection or they feel like they're not good enough.
Girls are dumb! Haha. We love falling for confidence over everything else. It takes some maturity to grow passed that. Too often people say “I can fix him” or “I just wish people could see how he is with just me”. Hopefully life experience steps in before marriages happen
Yeah
High degree of confidence that she knows exactly what she’s doing. I also reckon her new husband’s net worth is in the seven, if not eight figures.
Her (doubtless) good looks, good education, and good perception seems to have been employed in a potentially lucrative (career?):
Gold-digging!
Because young women are hard wired to get the tingles for lowlife shitbags.
This is known as the bad boy phase.
About age 30, most females have an epiphany and declare that they are “ready for a good man”.
By that time most young women have fucked up their lives in ways that cause good men to not want them.
Having a girlfriend/Wife that went through that phase and that never told you is really really scary for me. Thanks for reminding me my fear, lol!
Bad boys are unpredictable and adventurous so human brain is attracted to that excitement of what next ot gives adrenaline rush
Where as with good boys the relationship is predictable and same everyday it's secure and safe and after a point it becomes boring
I have been with both good and bad guys so i am able to share the experience
i would say cause narcissism and conceit can look very similar to competence and expertise. also i think there's a side of lacking confidence there. cause i think the urge to go for a "bad" guy comes from the desire to have a guy that no other girl would want. gives a false feeling of security.
I’ve been asking myself this for forty years! I’ve had women turn me down to go out with knuckle dragging, chest thumping, strutting ass holes and drugged out, brain dead, chronically unemployed losers since high school.
Part is a desire to blame their own bad behavior on men. It’s hard to say I got you drunk if I don’t drink and won’t buy you a drink.
First off: you should’ve just said she is beautiful. Being educated doesn’t make you more attractive (especially considering the fields women choose) we don’t care about what your level of education is (until we are seriously dating men do not care about anything but your looks get over it)
Do you know why?
Because they don't stick with the good guys because the good guys aren't exciting or "alpha-enough" for them.
That's fucking life which is why our species is insufficiently evolving.
Not all men show their true colors or intentions just like some women. Now If they know for a fact the guy has a bad reputation and they still go for him, then that's all on them.
Well, it'd help if you articulated his positive qualities since that's PROBABLY what she's playing for. Reading between the lines of what you wrote (twice her age, many mistresses all over the world), I'm going to guess that this dude is somewhere between very rich and absolutely loaded. So I think that MAY have something to do with why she "fell" for him.
Bad boys know how to charm a girl. And he could be a good guy deep down. The mistresses part could be just rumor or exaggeration. Maybe you’re a little jealous?
All I can say is that cases like this one prove that been "educated" is BULLSHIT in the end! Also the reason why guys don't care even slightest about a girl's education.
In general don't most women want a man who makes close to them or more? If so, their available choices go down the more successful they become. Do you know if this guy wealthy?
Because most women prefer confident attractive men even if they are trouble. Shit I poke fun at my girlfriend all the time because I'm trouble and she knows it and doesn't give a fuck because I can give her the sex she desires.
If this is all they’re into then they probably have problems of their own.
Some women enjoy being abused and like the submissive role. It's that simple.
Being educated doesn't necessarily transfer to wisdom.
Wicked people like other wicked people as their vaules and mentality matchs each other.
If she fell for a guy who has that many ex's and mistresses all over the world, she has major issues.
The same reason so many attractive educated men fall for bad girls…
It's about confidence, high network and how reliable they appear.
"Bad guys" are not boring, and the forbidden has always been a lure for people.
This question was written by a man, no doubt. You're an unfuckable loser that no one would ever love.
Because we still have animal urges when it comes to sex and love.
@MadClown Bad guys are exciting and dangerous 🔥
Because females don't want to work. she's probably hoping he dies soon and leaves her all his money.
Do you really want to know? I mean I'll tell you the truth but it's probably going to make you mad.
Some girls like the bad boy mystic. I also believe they have daddy issues
Because women are attracted to men that have other women, it's called hypergamy. Men are polygamous, women are hypergamous. It's the law of nature whether they want to admit it or not.
Because "well educated" does not mean smart.
Yes, a Regular Decent Guy is too boring for many women. That's the Gods Honest Truth.
They choose wrong because.
Wait, why is the man perverted?
Because he is an (older) Chad Thundercock.
Bad as a subjective term
Really good question……… 😪
What is his net worth?
They have a naughty mind that is why
he probably has money.
I don't
Immaturity.
This. The simplest answer is correct.
@ericclayton it annoys the hell outta me when I hear how girls mature faster than boys... Just as much as it annoys me when I hear older men are more mature than younger men... My father is in his 70$ and more often than not acts like my little brother.
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