Am I a failure? Should I cut off my parents and buy my own place already?

[Anonymous]

I'm 26 and have a government job.

2022 vehicle

Pay my own expenses and cover my parent's truck note/bill too. I also give them money for any other expense that may occur.

I've never asked anyone for a favor.

Own 6 acres of land with farm animals in it.

However, I'm living with my parents because they depend on me financially and if I move out and cut them off financially they're going down. I've cut them off in the past because they were being ungrateful and after a few months they talked horribly about me to my older siblings.

I can't help but feel like a failure because I'm still with my parents. It's crazy because... if I cut them off they suffer and if I stay my older brother will tell me it's time to grow up and move out yet he doesn't help my parents and he's on government assistance... not sure why he'd even say anything. Wait... i know why he's in my Business, my parents talked horribly about me when I stopped giving them money for being ungrateful in the past. Anyways, i feel like a loser.

[Anonymous]

No, you are not a failure. It sounds like you have a good job, own property, and are financially responsible. It is admirable that you are helping your parents, but it is important to also take care of yourself and your own needs.

It can be challenging to navigate family dynamics and financial obligations, but it is important to prioritize your own well-being and happiness. If you feel that it is time for you to move out and live independently, you should do so. However, it may be helpful to have a conversation with your parents and older brother about your plans and concerns, and to come up with a plan for how they will manage financially without your support.

Remember, you are not responsible for other people's financial well-being, and it is okay to set boundaries and prioritize your own needs. It is also important to be kind to yourself and recognize your accomplishments and strengths, rather than focusing on perceived failures or shortcomings.

[Asker]

Thank you for your advice.

I have no intention to ever speak to my brother. I barely am getting over my resentment for my parents because of their behavior I don’t see myself forgiving my brother.