Girls, I am driving myself crazy in silence, what can I do?

[Brokenheart14]

I am driving myself absolutely crazy! Lol I spoke about this girl a few times. In the beginning I never push anything. From day 1 she warned me of medical issues. I told her I am here. We go out and kiss on first date she ask for me to come back to meet some family. The vibe was so well, that I started to fall and fast! She helps her family by working and on top of it all has the medical problems. I notice a push back she tells me she needs to focus on her health but she still likes me but at this time she can’t give 100%. I tell her I understand if there is someone else and I’ll move away. She said no. I ask again a few weeks later and she got annoyed I asked. She called me and told me she likes me but at this point in time she can’t be in any relationship. Now I’m stuck and I don't know what to do other than be there for the girl. She messaged me she don’t want to lose me and I need to prove I can act right. I’m at the point where I like her that I don’t even want to bother talking to anyone else but I also can’t force her to be ready. What can i do? How do I just let it go with the flow so she’s not on my mind 24/7.

[Maybehislady67]

You lack severely on what someone's telling you to trust what they say. I see you're trying to counter act on her statement based off on her not being ready to low self esteem in yourself thinking it's another man in her life. Which is fair. So you asked her and she literally told you...
"she needs to focus on her health"
You literally go against that and say you get its with someone else like you have the right to date her if it's no other reason than it's someone else. It's almost like you can't take a NO regardless of why she feels that way. Take the high road on this one. Leave her alone before you make things worse

[Brokenheart14]

I agree with everything you said. And I agree I have some self esteem issues. When we first started talking she told me about it because she said it scared people away in the past. I told her I’m staying and wanna be there for her. The low self esteem comes from a previous girl, one that was always calling going on dates. It felt as we were a couple. I noticed it stopped and she was distant she said she couldn’t date cause of issues with family and court matters. I find out a few weeks later she was with her ex boy friend. So me saying I understand if it’s someone else is just me saying I rather know the truth than find out later what you said is a lie. I was hurt by that. I know not every girl is like the last. I also have a ex girlfriend that always belittled me said she can do better, her mom called me worthless one day so I’m always super hesitant. These issues come up when I start falling for a girl. I always feel as if I worked on the issues until this occurs

[Maybehislady67]

I see where you're coming from better thank you. I feel for the future just take what people say. Next time you could of asked and not assumed because maybe she wasn't with her ex when she did deny you. You actually probably pushed her to him by not giving her the space she needs. Don't take it personal. It seems you both have some healing to do. Also when you state things felt like youbwere in a relationship don't fall into that trap without making things official... and ASSUME you guys are dating. 1st mistake love.

[Brokenheart14]

Thank you, as for the girl with the ex she’s long gone. This a new girl we still chat and I feel like a big idiot right now because she’s been saying this for a few months (after scrolling our text). I don't know why now I was bugging out. I’m just upset cause this girl is so different and I wanan be there for her and I want to make her my girlfriend but she’s not ready.

[Maybehislady67]

I'm sorry love.
She's missing out!! Not you.
The next girl is the lucky one. Promise 🤞🏾

[Brokenheart14]

See that’s the thing she’s saying she likes me still but her health and school are in the way of being with me rn and that’s why she got mad cause I kept asking you sure it’s not another guy? And she called me saying no it’s not how many times do I need to tell you

[Maybehislady67]

Got it. Well again at first it probably wasn't. You may have pushed her into him OR... she was lying & didn't want to hurt you. If you know the truth and the person who isn't even your girlfriend telling you the truth and being honest is it really worth you stressing on about. You have to forgive yourself and learn and grow from the situation love

[Maybehislady67]

Aka she doesn't want to be with you

[Urfavblondegemini]

Okay, as a girl with multiple chronic health conditions who has been in this EXACT position before, just try your best to be a support person. If she tells you there isn't another guy, there probably isn't.

As for your feelings of loneliness, they are completely valid. No one will blame you if you want to talk to others. However, if you decide to talk to different people, don't be surprised if her feelings are hurt.

If you truly want to be exclusive and wait for her, that is seriously so sweet! Remind her that you're here for her, offer to go out and do something if she ever wants to take her mind off of things, check in on her every now and then, etc. If you're trying your best and things just aren't working for one of you, wish her the best and find someone who can be there for you.

Sorry for the lengthy reply, but good luck to you both!!

[Brokenheart14]

I am willing to wait for her! I love talking to her and she warned me from the beginning about all these problems which had me possibly believe she was letting me off soft I asked her a few more times which made her angry she called me and told me there is no one else. I don't know if I pushed her but the text are still lengthy and the emojis are still there but I still feel as if I lost her. I know her almost 4 months and I feel like I know her a life time. She makes me not want anyone else and it’s killing me