He’s Saudi Muslim. I like him… a lot but I’m not ready to get married. He’s divorced and has 2 kids. What do I do? How to deal with him?

[Anonymous]

I really do like him and tbh I don’t mind him having kids but…I’m not ready to get married. I’m also dealing with horrible insecurity and trust issues.

[Oliverlogan263]

That's a tricky situation. With him being Saudi and divorced with kids, he's probably looking to settle down again soon.

Since you really like him but aren't ready to marry yet, I'd just be really honest and upfront about where you're at. Have a serious talk, tell him you enjoy spending time together but marriage isn't something you can commit to any time soon. Make it clear you don't want to lead him on or waste his time if he's wanting a wife asap.

Hopefully he'll understand. Maybe suggest continuing as just friends for now so there's less pressure. Then see how things develop over time - you might feel more ready in a year or two. Just don't rush into anything major if you've got doubts.

As for the trust issues, I'd work on that separately through therapy or talking to friends. Don't get into a serious relationship until you've addressed that for yourself.

Hope it works out but be true to yourself first - better to be honest now than string him along and hurt him worse later. Communication is key!

[boggboss]

Wait so what are u actually asking here is he inteested in dating does he want to get married

[Asker]

He wants to get married

[boggboss]

If thats somthing u don't want I guess u guys go separate ways then

[Anonymous]

As someone who was married to a very devout Muslim, don’t do it, unless you too are a highly devout Muslim. The cultural differences are extreme and you will not be happy. Especially since this man already has kids. Do you think American mother-in-law‘s are horrible? Multiply that by 1000 and that’s what a Muslim mother-in-law is like. You will be treated like her personal servants. You’ll be treated like the maid of that entire family. They will dictate every single thing you do.

[Asker]

So, what should I do? Just let life run its course and keep my distance? I just don’t know what to do. I asked him why he divorced and he said it was because his ex was lazy and that’s why he asked for divorce and I guess she had no desire to keep custody. I don't know I really like him but I feel bad because I can’t have a normal…let’s see how it goes and have a normal talking stage because he already has kids. I feel guilty for wanting to take things slow and maybe have a little drama too.

[Opinion Owner]

I guarantee that’s not why he has custody of the kids. I’m curious to know where his wife is from. There’s definitely more to that story as to why he has the children. My advice is to run far far away from this man.

[Asker]

He told me his ex is his cousin. He told me she willfully didn’t want custody.

[Anonymous]

Yes, of course marry him. You need a strong man who can put you in your place. Its your job to serve. And most women are happy being passive and serving their man because that's what they are meant for.