I’ve been friends with this girl for around about two years. We don’t meet up that often but along the way I’ve gotten the impression she is not really a true friend or gossips about me behind my back and I don’t 100% fully trust her.
- When I upload some instagram stories, for example I might upload 3/4 stories on one day and she will often view stories 1 and 2 and then react to them in a supportive way, but then click off them as if she doesn’t want to view the rest. I have noticed over the years she will do this often
- another time I went to the pub with her and she abandoned me on my own at a time in my life when I felt most vulnerable. I was in a toxic relationship and confiding to her about it and I’d had a few drinks so by this point I felt more vulnerable because I was telling her some quite intimidate details about my relationship and opening up to her and then all of a sudden she told me that she had to go and abandoned me on my own in a pub and I had to walk home on my own and didn’t feel safe
- I am in a friendship group it’s me and two other girls. When we are all together I’ve noticed she will hype up the other girl and comment on her appearance and then say to me “don’t you think Emily looks amazing this evening” but will completely ignore me and not say one thing about the way I look
- one time I met up with her for drinks, and she basically told me that she had matched with this guy on an online dating site and this guy said that he had matched with a girl who had the same name as me and who lived in my area and then got all weird and said I shouldn’t
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Damn girl, sounds like this "friend" ain't much of a friend at all from what you described. A few red flags for sure:
- Half-viewing your stories is super bitchy and attention seeking behavior. Like she just wants to see what you're up to but not actually support you.
- Leaving you hanging at the pub when you were opening up about personal stuff is mega shitty. True bff's don't abandon each other when vulnerability's involved.
- Hyping up the other friend and ignoring you is competitive/mean girl vibes. Like she wants the attention on her and the other gal, not you. Not cool.
- Warning you about some random online dating thing just seems sneaky and gossipy. Like she was trying to stir up drama or make you paranoid for no reason.
I'd honestly start putting some distance there, sis. People like that ain't true friends - they're just hanging around to bring you down and backstab. Surround yourself with gals who genuinely support and build you up, not tear you down behind your back. You deserve better friends who got your back, for real.
She sounds like a narcissist. Believing that everything in the world revolves around them and don't see how they are hurting others by their action. These types of individuals will never learn nor can be told that they have an issue, they will believe everyone else is false and are jealous of them.
Since you believe she is a fake friend, just drag the "friendship" out to the point you barely ever talk to her. Let the friendship simply fade out.
Reads like you're the fake friend doing all the drama, and expecting them to always be there for you.
They are only friends, not your family or therapist.