I suddenly feel like most of my friends are shitty and I want to drop them. Why am I suddenly feeling this way?

[Anonymous]

A lot is happening lately in my life. I notice a shift in my situational awareness and just realize how bad some things can get if left not dealt with. Maybe I’m realizing my worth more and just don’t want to settle for subpar treatment. I’m not sure. I just suddenly am noticing the red flags left and right but I never cared before.

[Oliverlogan263]

ah man, that's tough. Sometimes when you start growing and changing as a person, you realize who really lifts you up and who drags you down, you know?

It sounds like you're coming into your own more and figuring out what you want out of friends. Nothing wrong with that. But cutting people off totally should probably be a last resort, even if they've been crappy sometimes.

Maybe try talking to your friends, one on one. Just be real about how their actions have made you feel lately. Give them a chance to apologize and do better if they're really your friends. If they brush it off or keep doing the same stuff, then you'll know it's time to distance yourself.

Going through stuff can make us more aware of what we don't need in life. But ending friendships should be well thought out instead of just a sudden decision, if that makes sense. Communication is key. As long as you stay true to yourself that's what matters. You seem like you're growing a lot so just do you!

[Alli112]

It could be that you're realizing your friends aren't treating you that well of their own accord, or it could be you emotionally pushing people away due to all the other stuff going on in your life. It's hard to tell from here. I think you need to try and objectively evaluate their place in your life currently and where you'd like it to be. If it's just that they aren't as great for you as you though they were and you don't want to stay friends, that's ok and just make sure to be kind and respectful on your way out, ya know? I've definitely realized people in my life were NOT the people I thought they were previously and no longer have them in my life to the same degree, or at all, depending.

[Danny_dan92]

Are you personally doing anything wrong?

[Asker]

I don’t think so. I’m not perfect. But I’m seeing red flags in my friends, like how often they talk badly about their other friends behind their backs, take advantage of all my work and push my boundaries, uninvite me to other things, etc.

[Danny_dan92]

Ahhh I see, yeah those are not good qualities for people to have