Why does my friend boast that every guy fancies her and men are intimidated by her beauty?

[Anonymous]

I went out with my friend the other night to have drinks. She told me that she was speaking to this guy she met through online dating and was seeing him. She told me that he mentioned me and that he also matched with me on online dating and was interested in me, and she showed me a picture of the guy and asked me if I’d been speaking to him. I said I’d never spoken to him before ever and that I’d deleted all my online dating apps. I told her it would probably have been another girl in the same area with my name. Then she proceeded to tell me that I shouldn’t speak to him as he was already obsessed with a girl called Gemma, and that I would be wasting my time speaking with him. She then sent me a photo of him as a private message and I had to keep convincing her that I’d never spoken to him.

I’ve also noticed when I meet up with her she will always brag to me about her latest “conquest” and what guy she’s dating. She will tell me about all the guys in her past who had a crush on her and what gifts they got her over the years and how obsessed they were with her. It’s getting really boring that all she wants to do is talk to me about the latest guy she’s dating. There is usually a new guy every three months because they always end up screwing her over. She will talk about guys we’ve both gone to school with who had a crush on her and who asked her out. She is coming off as quite narcissistic and all she wants to talk about is herself and how many guys are obsessed with her. Whenever we meet up she will say things to me like “men are intimidated by my beauty so they don’t approach me, so I approach men” and “I went to the gym the other day and this guy was staring at me working out he couldn’t take his eyes off me” and she will say “I have a crush on three guys at the gym and all of them want to give me their number”

I don’t want to be mean but she’s average in looks and is nothing special. Why is she bragging so much about how many guys are into her?

[iCuddleU]

Your friend’s behavior might be driven by deeper psychological and social factors. One reason could be a need for validation. People often seek external validation to feel good about themselves, and by frequently talking about how men fancy or are intimidated by her beauty, she may be trying to gain reassurance or approval from others to boost her self-esteem. This can help her feel desirable and accepted, especially if she feels uncertain about other aspects of her identity.


Another possibility is insecurity or self-doubt. Ironically, those who boast about their attractiveness might be covering up feelings of inadequacy. By consistently drawing attention to how others perceive her looks, she could be masking deeper insecurities, using outward confidence as a way to project control over her image.


Societal pressures also play a role. Society often places significant value on physical appearance, especially for women. Media and cultural narratives suggest that a woman's worth is tied to how attractive she is or how much attention she receives. Your friend might have internalized these messages, leading her to equate being admired with personal value.


There’s also the possibility that she enjoys the sense of power or control it gives her. Being seen as highly attractive can feel empowering for some, and if she believes men are intimidated by her beauty, it may provide her a sense of control in social interactions. The idea that she can influence others’ behavior through her appearance might make her feel more dominant in relationships.


Lastly, attention-seeking could be at play. She may simply enjoy the attention and admiration that come from making such claims. By frequently bringing up her desirability, she keeps the focus on herself, which can be a way of gaining attention from her peers, including you.

[EmmaMary]

Obviously your friend is one of those self conceited, arrogant and egotistical individuals... Sorry to be so blunt... I'm just saying it as I read it.

[EmmaMary]

Thank you for the MHO.

[Zack-Bann]

Classic coping mechanism for ugly chicks (and dudes)
You’re calling her average so one can assume you’re being generous as she’s your friend


Let me guess: horizontally challenged too?

[DryGermanGuy]

It's colloquially called the "Angela syndrome", from American Beauty lore.

[genericname85]

i guess she's using self delusion to explain why she's single xD

[jahaims]

Because she is a loser who finds value in that

[Danny_dan92]

Possibly insecure