Tinder match, real life chemistry?

[Anonymous]

Matched with a girl on tinder, 2 days before New Years, anyway we start chatting and instantly hit it off and she invites me to her set she's playing on New Years Eve, not expecting me to pitch, I rock up with a pot plant and spend some time with just her and then some of her friends but I don't stay the entire night.

The chemistry is there and she even invites me to their after party, anyway I leave but don't make it to the after party, didn't want to be too available but I also had another party to go too.

We chat in the week, sharing pictures of the plant and telling me about her mom's being around etc. But she's free on Sunday, so I shoot my shot and she says yes and we even joke about her mom coming and how much she would like me too.

Day of the date, I check in on Sunday, after her message on Saturday saying she wants it to be just us and no her mom can't come with us...

I just mention the dress code and I got this:

Hi X. I’m so sorry but I can’t make it today. I got some really bad news yesterday and really not up to seeing anyone today. I’m really sorry

In our conversation I picked up some familiar sadness. She's a single parent and so am I, but we never got to speak about that, it's just on our socials.

I want to reach out, check how she's doing, maybe even a grand gesture of hiring her out for a set only to be met by me and a prepped meal? Too much?

Should I forget about her? I can't...

Updates

1 y

Sent this... now we wait
Special K! Gem and a Naai, Aubrey, DJ, Yogi... and anyone else yet to meet...
The last time we spoke, things sounded rough, so I just wanted to touch base... Everything ok by you?
I really hope Gem and a Naai was what you said... Oops if not!!! 😬 (inside joke)

Updates

1 y

We've been chatting this morning, it was a really bad piece of news about her health and some markers that came up as a concern 😟

I've got knowledge on this topic after both my parents were affected by it... going to be the funny af supportive person for now

[Oliverlogan263]

Whoa, that's a pretty intense situation with that Tinder match, dude. It sounds like you two had some serious chemistry going on, but now she's hit you with this last-minute cancellation due to some bad news.

I totally get why you're feeling conflicted about it. On the one hand, she seemed really into you and you were both looking forward to the date. But then she pulls the plug at the last minute, which has to sting a bit.

The tough part is, you don't really know the full context of what's going on with her. She mentioned getting some bad news, which could be anything from a family emergency to a personal crisis. Without more details, it's hard to know how to best support her.

I think reaching out to check in on her is a good move. The message you sent sounds thoughtful and genuine - no need to go over the top with some grand gesture right now. Just focus on showing you care and are there for her, no strings attached.

As for whether you should forget about her... I wouldn't necessarily do that just yet. If this was someone you genuinely connected with, it's understandable that you don't want to let that go. But you also have to be prepared that this could be the end of the romantic potential, at least for now.

My advice would be to keep the lines of communication open, but don't try to force anything. If she needs some space to deal with whatever's going on, respect that. Just let her know you're thinking of her and available if she wants to talk or hang out in the future.

In the meantime, try not to get too hung up on this one situation. Keep swiping on Tinder, go out with your friends, focus on your own life. There are plenty of other potential connections out there, so don't put all your eggs in this one basket, you know?

Hang in there, bro. I'm sure whatever's going on with this girl will work itself out one way or another. Just focus on being a good friend and supportive dude, and see where it goes from there.

[Abbycado]

Yeah, without knowing what the emergency was, I wouldn’t give up. If it becomes a habit then probably should.

[Abbycado]

Ty for mho!

[WhitneySnow]

She’s telling the truth. Give her a week, then reach out to check on her. No grand gestures.

[Yoursweetgirl]

I'd give her space, wait like 3-4 days, then reach out and just check on her.

[In_Trance]

Reach out once more and see what happens