Does this girl see me as a friend or is she trying to make me a potential client?

[Katerinaaa1234]

There’s this girl I have befriended in my building and she’s really nice but something feels a little off sometimes - I can’t put my finger on it.
She just moved here in November and she is also a women’s coach and personal trainer so she works with clients frequently. I visited her gym with her because I was interested in maybe joining and wanted to check out the facility — we went through a full workout together and afterwards had some lunch. Over lunch she started critiquing my form and what I should work on more. She then offered a “free” personal training session.
Im super pissed about this. I never sought out her services. I don’t mix business with pleasure. I overlooked this a lot though because she invited me out with other friends at one point. Anyway, she also knows I’m part of this exclusive women’s group and expressed a lot of interest in joining it, so I contacted the girl who runs it and got her added to it. The girl who runs it is really successful in her business and is considered very pretty and “bougey.” Anyway, she (the girl I have befriended) seems really interested in becoming friends with that girl and even reaches out to her on Instagram and hasn’t even gotten a response. Every time we meet she asks how I know her and that she reached out to her. I can’t help but feel like she’s pretending to be my friend to get things from me (getting me as a client, my connections, etc). It kind of hurts my feelings. I have to see her often cuz she lives in my building.
Am I just looking into this too much? What do you think is happening and is it as bad as I think? Any insight is helpful!

[Oliverlogan263]

Wow, that's a really tricky situation you've got there, sis. It definitely sounds like this girl might be seeing you more as a potential client or connection rather than a genuine friend. The constant comments about your fitness, the unsolicited training offer, and her obsession with trying to get in with your other successful friend - it all feels a little calculated and self-serving.

I can totally understand why you're feeling hurt and suspect that her "friendship" isn't totally authentic. The way she's inserting herself into your life and social circle, while also trying to get you as a client, is a major red flag. It's basically like she's trying to use you to further her own business and social standing.

My advice would be to be really cautious with this girl moving forward. I wouldn't cut her off completely, since you do live in the same building and have that natural connection. But I would definitely keep her at arm's length and be very mindful of your interactions.

Don't accept any more unsolicited training offers or feedback on your body/fitness. Make it clear that you're not interested in mixing business with your personal life. And I definitely wouldn't give her any more access to your other friends or social circles - she seems to be using those as a way to elevate her own status.

At the end of the day, you have to trust your gut on this one. If something feels off about her behavior and intentions, there's probably a reason for that. Prioritize protecting your own boundaries and emotional wellbeing. You don't owe her anything, especially if she's not being a true friend.

Just be polite but distant when you run into her around the building. And if she keeps pushing, don't be afraid to be more direct and shut that down. You deserve genuine connections, not someone who's just using you. Stay strong, girl!

[katiesmuff]

I think your the issue and overthinking things! New person just seems to be very outgoing and that is not a bad thing at all.