How to stop comparing to other girls?

[Mon1to]

I’m sure a lot of girls can relate.
In our generation, we’re often seen as objects, judged more for our looks than our character. Social media only makes it worse, pushing unrealistic beauty standards and making us feel like we have to be perfect. It’s exhausting. So what to do?

[Anonymous]

For one I think a lot of times women do that to theirselves. Yes I get men look at looks, but women tend to be their worst enemy. I’d say get off social media. Stopping feeding into everyone is out partying, life is one big party, that if. you’re not out there too you’re missing out on life. What happens is social media takes only the best parts of a video, pieces them together, then post it. Making people, especially women feel like they’re different from everyone else, that I have to be the same. Understand that a lot of things women worry about, men don’t care about. Also understand that yes you as a female are put under a lot of pressure but a lot of things, but men are as well. It doesn’t seem like it because we don’t go on social media usually crying. Not all women do that but seems like a lot get on social media to cry about everything wrong in life. As a man it’s you against you, no one coming to save you as we’re told so you either move on or drown. I get some boys are feminine nowadays so they are the exception. Each gender faces problems in life.

[Mon1to]

I get your point—social media fuels unrealistic expectations, and women can be their own worst critics.
Both men and women face struggles, just in different ways. Most females don’t care much about a guy’s looks; they value personality and how he treats them:)
Thanks for the answer tho!

[Opinion Owner]

They may not care about his looks but there’s a lot of
pressure on men to be the provider. A lot of women don’t want a 50/50 relationship, even if she makes as much as him. any women still expect the man to be the provider, the protector. So that’s one thing men are under pressure to do. Sure she may not say that in the beginning, but as they move on in their relationship she’s going to want a house, a car, probably children, probably want to be a SAHM. So he has to figure that out otherwise he isn’t really looked at for a potential life long partner.
There’s no need for you to be like everyone else. Take the path less traveled. It’s your life. You’re either going to make it what you want it to be or not want it to be. Guarantee a lot of the “friends” you have in your life now won’t be there in 10 years. Do what’s best for you.

[Mon1to]

Jokes on u, I don't have many friends. People use each other n when we don't need them anymore, get rid of them. Ik guys have struggles, but my question is about appearance, so ye. Still, thanks.

[Opinion Owner]

What about appearance?

[Opinion Owner]

Again stay of social media. Maybe take some classes or courses on personal development. Read books on these things as well. Understand everyone progresses at different rates. I think too a big thing for women is to stay grounded, live in reality. A lot of women tend to think they’re “queens.” That they deserve this or that simply for being a female.
But I think social media is one of the biggest villains in all of this. Women get likes from strangers online, espeuckajybfrom men so their ego is inflated making them thinking they can get any man they want.

[Mon1to]

I have hobbies, they r great for relaxing n improving:3

[Opinion Owner]

What are your hobbies?

[Mon1to]

I love going on walks, which is very relaxing, drawing, poetry, love designing things

[Opinion Owner]

Nice. Walking is very relaxing. Especially when it’s quiet. Drawing is another good relaxing hobby. I like drawing as well, but I have not done it as much like I used to when I was younger. What kind of things do you like to draw?

[Mon1to]

hmm, whatever comes to mind, but I try to learn hands

[SteveSmith1985]

I don't know if you can completely stop comparing yourself to other girls. I think all you can really do, is to make a conscious effort to catch yourself doing it.

The points you bring up are valid. If you make a conscious effort to avoid feeling inadequate by reminding yourself that you're more than some object whose value is determined by how attractive you are.

In other words, the only solution is to consciously reject the pressure to meet a standard you know to be unrealistic for most girls. It's not something you can succeed at completely. It's keeping in mind what you know intellectually; when you find yourself feeling inadequate because you're comparing yourself to other girls.

I love seeing this question from a 17 year old. (also, it's not just your generation. Not at all. There wasn't Instagram, but there was the exact same pressure from magazines and other (non-social) media. This is an old problem)

🙂

[BarryLiverstone]

So you know that no one is perfect. In fact if everyone looked “perfect” the world would be boring!


Also realize that girls have extra hormones related to their monthly cycles and those hormones can cause you to feel what you are describing. So if you can remind yourself that all girls feel the same you feel less alone.


Do you have reliable friends? Dressing in a cute outfit and getting feedback on your style can be an ego boost or help you feel attractive with their feedback.

[BarryLiverstone]

And think about the one girl who you see online and think “she’s perfect”, that you would kill to be her. Well likely she doesn’t look like that irl as we know online pics can be faked and filtered and touched up. That girl is likely thin so she’s been hungry her whole life and can’t eat anything tasty you can. If you asked her if she hates any of her body parts she could quickly rattle off a list of 5 parts she dislikes. And she is constantly stared at by creepers and jelly ladies and is never able to blend in. So really? Would you really kill to feel like that?

Ultimately pray, be thankful for the blessings you have and know you will meet someone who loves and cherishes you and you will be perfect in his eyes. Once you fall in love that’s the only eyes you will care that see you anyway.

[Mon1to]

You're so right. It's easy to look at someone online and think they have it all together, like they’re perfect, but the truth is, most of what we see isn't even real. Filters, editing, and posing can make anyone look flawless. I don't believe in this crap, but guys do. Which is sad because u can't never be good enough for them. They will cheat for sure, no matter their status or the money in their bank account. I don't hate myself that much, but I wish to know I'm worth loving, haha

[LiamS95]

Believe in yourself and your own beauty which csn be physical beauty, a beautiful personality, a beautiful character or all three. Be confident of what you truly are not ehst society expects you to be.

[Mon1to]

That's true, but guys still cheat, even on gorgeous models. I don't know why they can't never be satisfied enough.

[LiamS95]

Well I agree that finding satisfaction within a loving relationship is important but takes more then just good looks.

[Mon1to]

Hopefully, but most guys don't think like that

[Adogdog]

You have to learn to be happy the way you are.

[Mon1to]

easier said than done haha

[Adogdog]

I know lol

[jahaims]

By getting your value as a person from who you are as a person and not from others scoring system.

[wkhan_87]

That is bigger problem in teenage girls, i would only say that be positive and confident.

[Mon1to]

hard in our generation

[Sevenpointfive]

only those pretty ones make it to the island

[Mon1to]

I don't know what island u yapping about, but true. Especially in our society:p

[Sevenpointfive]

it won't stop. even amongst ugly girls. there's always the girl most likely to get a guy award.