Do you think she finds me cute or attractive or is she just being a friend?

[Anonymous]

There is a girl at work who I find attractive but I don’t seek her out and I don’t really initiate conversations with her much.

So I haven’t seen her really in the past month cause I don’t want to talk to people here much right now and she just happens to fall into that. I changed my route to get into the building and it cut off when I see her most of the time.

So on the day before Christmas Eve I was downstairs talking to someone and I had my back turned and I guess she was coming out of the lunchroom and I hear her say my name with enthusiasm, I turn around and she’s smiling and says Merry Christmas!!! Happy Holidays!!!

And then today I went downstairs and I spotted her across the office talking to someone in their cubicle. I didn’t make eye contact with her and I went Into someone else’s office to do something. She popped into the office smiled and looked at me and said you’re not <her name> I said yeah what’s up, and she said how are you, and then left.

So the incident that happened today, I don’t know why she would have to go into that office, she was chatting with someone in their cubicle and she probably spotted me when I spotted her. So it feels to me like she purposely came in just to say hi to me, and when she called my name to wish me Merry Christmas I wasn’t even facing her and had my back turned and didn’t even realize she was leaving the lunchroom behind me.

I just wonder if I’m reaching. I try to put myself in her shoes. I’m a quiet mostly reserved person. I wouldn’t do these things to a girl I would not find attractive.

I wonder if she is just being a friendly person. But here's two instances I feel in the past week where I’m not even paying attention to her or talking to her and she finds a way to talk to me.

[HollyK21]

It does sound like a bit of a reach. I feel like I have a similar personality in the workplace to this woman, and usually it’s just me being friendly. I’m a pretty bubbly person, some days more than others, and I’m sure I’m guilty of showing it with one person more than someone else.


In any case, I can’t speak for your coworker and neither can anyone else. When it comes to having crushes my logic is that even if you don’t know how they feel about you, you already know how you feel about them. So have the courage to make some sort of move and see what happens next. The only downside I think almost anyone would agree with is that you shouldn’t shit where you eat, I mean it would be super awkward and uncomfortable to navigate around her after a rejection, or having to worry about gossip spreading through work how it always seems to. You have to decide if it’s worth the risk.

[Summeroflove]

Well she could be being friendly especially in professional settings people can be hard to read because you have to be nice. But she is going out of her way…. If you’re interested just talk to her see if she will grab coffee.

I get it. As well as the fact people are going to tone it down if they like someone. Many people don’t want to get into trouble. So they may not be as forward as they would be in a more social setting.

[Brady]

She thinks you're attractiv. In 11th grade a girl in the hall askd what my name was. I told her.

She would say hi 2 me. 1ce I was in a class. She walkd down the hall, lookd in n waved 2 me. I waved bak. Durin yearbook dy. she wanted 2 sign n she drew a heart after her signature.

[Iron_Man]

Why don’t you ask her the next time you see her instead of guessing

[In_Trance]

Ask her