Why do women feel so entitled to men paying the bill?

Question

There must be other more important things to worry about. It's funny cause many of these women consider themselves to be "feminists" as well.

Anonymous · Accepted Answer

I want to say, you discuss payment of bill before going out, whoever initiates the date tends to be the one paying default.

Second, women I’ve talked to claim its to see a man capable of providing for his family.
However I’d argue paying for your date’s McDonalds or Wendy’s or Diner burger doesn’t mean he’s capable. It’s a one night, one chance.

It is annoying in this economy to pay for your meal, let alone somebody else’s so there shouldn’t be this hostility and close mindedness against splitting the bill or you pay for yours or whatever, there should be some compassion.

The blame doesn’t land on the woman, more so than society as a whole since its been normalized since men used to be the breadwinners and now women tend to succeed on their own. Again, discuss method of payment prior and if you initiate then prepare to pay and don’t whine or complain when it comes down to it.

Women aren’t there for the meal, more so to get to know the man they want to date and make sure he’s the one she’d like to invest her time into getting to know, or at least that’s how it should be. And men shouldn’t be willing to pay for a meal just for sex.

HawkPerception · Accepted Answer

Because of a lack of logic or empathy mostly.

It made sense back in the day when women were not the breadwinners that the man should pay. Because they didn't have money at all. However, nowadays after feminists fought for equal pay and equal rights, they somehow still expect men to pay. So what... they want all the benefits of equality without the responsibility? Is their time worth more than a man's? Do they not also want to go on the date and get to know the guy? Do they want a sugar daddy or a partner?

They need to learn that they can't have their cake and eat it too. Either you're a traditional woman who wants to be a housewife and the man to provide entirely (which is not a viable option for most men in this economy), or you bring your share to the table.

I personally don't care to date a girl who isn't cool with paying for herself on a date, unless she says she wants to be a stay at home wife, in which case, if I have the means, I'd be happy to have that dynamic.

I don't need a selfish and narcissistic woman in my life.

sorrySammy · Accepted Answer

I have never felt entitled to having a man pay the bill. I believe that women are just as capable of paying as men.

In Portugal, there is a common social rule, applied not only to dating, but also among friends and family, that the person who extends the invitation is the one who pays.

While it’s true that some women may take advantage of the idea that “the man should pay,” I don’t believe this reflects women as a whole. Being invited is certainly a nice gesture, but so is extending an invitation and paying in return. Mutual respect and reciprocity matter more than rigid gender expectations.

CupcakeTheDestroyer · Accepted Answer

You have to blame patriarchal social standards for that. It’s the “gentlemanly” thing to do, and women are allowed to want the conventionally defined good guy to be their partner.

Static_In_The_Attic · Answer

Times are changing & times have changed & nowadays there are a lot of people that think they’re entitled to something or everything. As for going on dates let’s face facts here. Guys are expecting booty calls & a lot of girls are taking us on foodie calls.

As for paying the bill my thoughts are if you invite someone especially a date you pay for them & if she invites you hopefully she does the right thing & offers to pay.

Get used to paying bro & if you get married good luck because if the marriage doesn’t work out you’ll be paying even more if a prenuptial agreement isn’t in place.

Marriage is like a hurricane there is a lot of blowing in the beginning & when it’s all said & done your house is gone.

Purpleronnie · Answer

I beleive some may , while others may not but it’s not about women per se it’s about “norms” colliding with modern reality.

Old school gender roles meant that men were expected to pay because men earned the money. It’s also true that some women may feel that paying is a sign of interest or investment , not of romance. Even our social conditioning , in the movies we watch , dating advice and from our parents quietly reinforces the idea that the man “should” pay.

Where entitlement becomes obligation that’s when it stops being tradition and instead becomes entitlement.

It could be said that women want equality but selectively , while men want fairness but don’t want to look un-romantic not wanting to fall foul of being called cheap as if he doesn’t pay for it he doesn’t value it … a common mismatch

The truth is that nobody is OWED a paid date and paying does NOT make you a good man and NOT PAYING doesn’t challenge your masculinity.

Should a woman’s interest depend on your wallet , well perhaps that tells you much about their personality and also their priorities. Paying for dinner could save you much in the long run 😇🤔

Zack-Bann · Answer

They feel “entitled” when you allow them to feel that way through the provider frame

Many men lead with their wallets, they’ll flex monetary possessions early on as proof they’re worth something.

Then they wonder why the woman expects a meal.

I would say as a man: pay for the meal and move on with the rest of your date. It shouldn’t be such an outrageous thing.

But if you consider it something you don’t want to do then don’t lead with your wallet

There was a time in my life I was broke college student and I dated a few women that were a couple of years older than me and already working.
They never asked me to pay for anything
In fact some even treated me to a pizza from time to time.
Because I had the frame of the “broke lover” and they enjoyed that.

When I started working and earning I began paying tabs. It never felt strange or forced because I always chose who I take and where to make sure it’s within my means

I won’t take a girl to a 5 star place and have her order a thousand things and then wonder if we’re splitting the bill
That’s how you end up in uncomfortable situations

Anonymous · Answer

I think women expect it, some women even demand it and I think if women didn't keep demanding equality or expect so much from men then men wouldn't have a problem with paying.

You see most women now expect equality with wanting the same thing me have but still want the benefits of being a woman like expecting men to pay, give up their seats, have the men make the first move to asking you out, proposing and so on.

So women need to evaluate what they want because it's not equality they want, it's just they want certain benefits the same as men have that's it.

I think if women were more honest with what they want it wouldn't be a sh/tsh©w now

sawno · Answer

There are two reasons for it.
First of all if you ask someone out its only fair that you pay for it. It wasn't their idea to go on a date, it was your idea to go on a date. So unless it was a horrible date you should cover them as an act of good faith.

Second, if you are looking for a more traditional relationship its a custom that you show her that you are willing and able to provide for her by paying for the date. That's quite an essential gesture in my opinion if your looking for someone who is going to stay at home.

In further dates you could change it up where she pays one or its split, but I do think its fair that the asker pays.

OneViewpoint · Answer

I has been to social custom for centuries in a lot of countries. Why? because until maybe the last 60 years, most women were not allowed to own property or acquire wealth. Men had the jobs, the education, the bank account, the credit cards. So men paid the tab. Things have only changed very recently. And let's face it, most women are in no hurry to give up that particular facet of the patriarchy. They ain't stupid. But all joking aside, I've found a LOT of the women I meet and date are absolutely fair when it cones to money. Women buy me a drink one for one, split the dinner tab, or even pick up the tab for dinner without telling me. I've found that a LOT of women actually have made the transition to whipping out their credit card on a date.

Anonymous · Answer

I look at the flipside. I don't get why paying the bill is such a problem for some guys.

I mean I do get not wanting to waste money on the wrong woman, a woman who never really even considered you. But if that be the case then just be that much more discerning with the women you choose. Only do coffee dates. F*** the woman that has a problem with a coffee date. The whole point of a date is to get to know the other person. Any woman that is judging you based on the monetary commitment you're putting forth on the first date is NOT worth dating.

I'm completely OK with saying most women today are NOT dating material. And men out there should be ok with that to. This is THEIR problem, not yours. They never have to grow up and change if they do not want to. But you do not have to tolerate them or their shenanigans for a second either if you do not want to.👍

Miristheiss · Answer

Historic courting where women lived with parents and men courted them.

Courted for marriage.

Now women are feminists, liv on their own and are sexually promiscuous. Not traditional women of honor.

They forget their half of the equation. No need to be tradional towards them.

Hagar88 · Answer

They like to be taken out. Women today take too much advantage of this, they see it as a way to get free food. Talking to some black guys they say black women not only expect them to pay for their food and drinks on a date but also their hair, nails and outfit.

My first date with my wife I took her out for a coffee and a walk around a park, the coffee cost me about a dollar. Another date was an ice cream.

MrChinaski · Answer

I think the rough rule is that if you earn a lot more money then you suck it up and pay, if you are similar you take turns paying starting with you, if she earns a lot more money then you then you still take turns... sucks to be a man, but in a pretty trivial way in the grander scheme.

Aiko_E_Lara · Answer

I wouldn't really mind them being entitled with it if they also do their part as women. If she decides she's a modern woman, then she needs a modern man who's not required to pay.

snermcger · Answer

Back before feminism absolutely destroyed everything, the man paid to show that he was capable of doing it.

If a man treated you nicely during the courting phase, then that is one indicator that he would or could provide for your offspring.

Now, everyone works. The state raises and indoctrinates your children, so it's fairly pointless outside of a vacuous 'freebie'.

Feminism killed courting.

captain_voidwalker · Answer

I dont mind footing the bill but a first date should be casual, like coffee. I dont mind buying a nice dinner by date 3 or 4. But women these days seem to expect a 5 star restaurant on the first date and no, sorry ladies us gents aren't falling for the foodie call anymore

Nikki1989 · Answer

They don't.  If you had any real-life experience, you would know this.

Chazmatazz269 · Answer

That’s the power of privilege. They can make mountains out of molehills because they don’t have any real problems.

robocop666 · Answer

they only want equal rights when it suits them

lilBigPotato · Answer

I highly doubt the majority of women feel "entitled". It's a nice gesture from his side, nothing more nothing less.

FunkyMonkee · Answer

Most likely, up until about 85 years ago, most women didn't have jobs and made no money so, men always paid their way so, it just became a tradition.

DonaldDarko · Answer

Evolution, gender roles are evolved traits.

XXTruthfulOgrexx · Answer

Because it has been an expected gender role. No more, no less.

Anonymous · Answer

Because that is the way it always has been, and is supposed to be. Women are supposed to be courted, and men are supposed to do the courting.

Anonymous · Answer

It's typically a sense of entitlement combined with a high degree of hypocrisy. That combination characterizes the majority of modern women.

Anonymous · Answer

because of gynocentrism that has raised girls to be princesses if not goddesses and raised boys to be servants if not slaves

Anonymous · Answer

Patriarchy - they teach them like that since they were kids.

Sal_Monella · Answer

Cultural tradition.

Why do women feel so entitled to men paying the bill?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Why do some women think they’re entitled to men’s money?

Why do women feel so entitled to men paying the bill?

Most Helpful Opinions

What Girls & Guys Said

Why do some women think they’re entitled to men’s money?

We're glad to see you liked this post.