I haven't had a girlfriend my whole life and I'm 18, normal or not?

Question

Its not like ?I haven't tried but now it just seems that I've got more important things to focus on such as getting a job, college, etc. But girls don't even ask me out or anything, I consider my self attractive, but not the best looking, I think I have a good personality (but not without its flaws mind you) so I'm unsure as to why girls seem to have a lack of interest in me. Help me out? Is this normal as well?

Darkfairie17 · Accepted Answer

Perfectly normal, I had my first boyfriend at 18. Some people don't date through elementary school or high school. Besides at 18 you are still very young, so I wouldn't worry too much about it. It may seem like you are the only one, but trust me you are not.

Plus relationships when you are younger aren't as good. Now that you are older it's going to get better.

I wouldn't compare your love life to other people's. Everyone is different. I have friends who met their life partner in high school and have been together ever since. Mind you they are only 23, but now at this point in their lives they are dealing with issues that people who are 20 years older deal with. Like lack of sex in the relationship, I just had a friend who has 2 kids and is my age confide in me about this.

Sometimes it's better to wait, because you are a bit older and can deal with some of the problems. I have seen many relationships fail because the couple is just too young to deal with some of these issues. They compare themselves to other people all the time too, and that doesn't help. No one who has been with someone for 5+ years and has kids is going to have the same relationship as someone who is in their early twenties and just started dating.

The right person is going to come along eventually. In the meantime I would focus on the other things in your life that you enjoy. By doing those things you open yourself up to meeting people with similar interests.

want2helpout84 · Accepted Answer

Yes it's VERY normal. I'm ten years older than yourself and at that age, it's okay to have a girlfriend/boyfriend but it's not a priority you should have as your are still very young. Actually a relationship is one of those things you don't have to have. It's optional unlike a job, you need it to survive. When you are in a relationship, your priorities change and you have to attend to the other person's needs as well as your own. You have to figure out a balance in your life like that and if you have fights or arguements with your boyfriend or girlfriend, it's gonna hurt because you will start to care for them and what they think.

Im not sure you will be ready or will be able to handle those kinds of responsibilities but hey heck what do I know? I don't know you. I just know how old you are because you stated it. Either way, it's nice to be in a relationship IF you two get along and have A LOT of things in common. Other wise you are just wasting you feelings/emotions and time and that could be better spent doing other more productive things such as the things you have listed.

LittleMissGriff · Accepted Answer

Dude, I'm 23 and haven't had more than a few dates. Granted, that's largely because I don't care, but the fact is that unless you make dating a priority, there's a good chance it won't happen. Personally, I'm up to my eyeballs in school, I have a job, two dogs, my family nearby, and more friends than I know what to do with. I honestly don't have time to go hunt down a guy or dedicate at least one night a week to 'cuddle time'. Do I regret it? Not particularly. To summarize, I've got other sh*t to do.

There are plenty of teenagers who've had several steady significant others by the time they are 18, but there's also plenty who haven't. Instead of worrying about whether you're on the same dating curve as the rest of the world, figure out what would make you happy and go for it. If dating is something you feel is important at this moment in your life, it's going to take more risk taking and probably several rounds of rejection before you see any differences. It will also take time, because there's a difference between 'finding a girl you like' and 'finding any girl at all'.

rockingpianoman · Accepted Answer

not abnormal - or I would be abnormal too:p

i'm 20 , I consider myself quite goodlooking and I 've been told that I'm not bad looking , also asked multiple girls out , just is harder to make it 'click' with someone so it seems. Girls usually see me as their friend although I flirt , touch and make it clear to them that I'm not going for the friendzone. Younger (non girlfriend material) girls love me and the ones I'm interested in don't seem to be loving me that much XD OK so far my case to show you you are not alone :p

but look , it's not abnormal , although I can't say why they aren't interested in you , it can be anything fro mthe way you dress to the way you are 'too nice' .. it's just having luck with finding someone who likes the mix you have of your personality and style...

you can always ask female friend for advice , maybe they will tell you how you need to act or look different ...

and so far in my life I've encountered no girl who asked me out , I have lots of male friends , and they never got asked out by a girl , they all did the work themselves. So in a way , it's a numbers game - the more girls you know , the more girls you ask out , the more chance you have on finding someone who likes you the way you are :)

gonyr · Accepted Answer

Got my first girlfriend at 18. Almost 21 now and we're still together.

College gives you a great chance to kind of re-invent yourself a little bit. Obviously don't change who you are, if someone doesn't like you for you than why have a relationship with them right?

But if maybe you were a little bit shy in HS, or you got labeled something because HS sucks, you can come out of your shell. Also, a university, espcially the bigger ones, bring together so many people from so many walks of life. You're bound to find someone with something in common

Honeybaby · Answer

There is no age limit when it comes to finding a girlfriend or boyfriend, being 18 years of age without a girlfriend is meaningless. You say that you have more important thing to focus like a job and college, so it seems to me that you have your priorities in the right order. If girls are not asking you out, it probably has nothing to do with you, but the type of personality or looks they are attracted to. Try and venture out elsewhere and you just might find the right person or the right person might find you.

CuddlyCarla · Answer

Newsflash - even in 2012, girls generally don't ask men out. Women are attracted to men who are confident, if you aren't exuding that (which you suggest by your comment of waiting for women to ask you out) it's not surprising you find yourself single. Believe in yourself and be assertive and you'll have better luck. That said, there is no "normal", so don't compare yourself to what other people are doing. I don't think you not having a girlfriend is abnormal, everyone has a different pace and life.

quentos · Answer

It's perfectly normal. The longer you wait, the more your 1st relationship will be worth it - and may even me the last one at the same time, "ever after".

I'm 28 and haven't had a girlfriend yet either. But when I meet her one fine day, it's gonna be an everlasting love.

FlamingoHunter · Answer

Wasn't normal in my town that I grew up with. You were ridiculed if you didn't. Frankly, there wasn't anything to do in this town.

I'm 21 and still yet to have an relationship. My issues come from childhood. I have very little confidence in pursuing relationships, but not lacking confidence itself.

Anonymous · Answer

Sound perfectly normal to me. I am 22 and I still never have a girl friend before. My personality and look are OK. A couple of girls hinted to me that they are interested in me but I can't connect with them. So I am still waiting for my miss right.

picklejuice817 · Answer

I'm 17 and have never had a boyfriend lol don't feel bad :)

Alextricity · Answer

I'm 21 and haven't had a girlfriend either.

I've been talking to a girl online for 2 and a half years now though, and we're supposed to meet this summer. I wouldn't worry about still being single unless you're extremely socially awkward. If that were the case, I'd suggest seeing a therapist, because you could have a reaaaally lonely life.

Habakkuk · Answer

don't worry about it... to paraphrase a great quote: never compare yourself to others as there will always be a greater and a lesser than you, and doing so will either breed bitterness or arrogance

Anonymous · Answer

Yeah uhh..girls don't ask guys out lol where have you been? we have to do all the work!

And it's perfectly fine to be 18 and not have had a girlfriend. I didn't have a girlfriend until I was 20, besides all the relationship stuff in high school is just bullsh*t anyway. I mean it's not like your gonna end up with that person anyway, unless you not knock her up or something.

Anonymous · Answer

It's normal, don't worry. And the older you are, the more special it will be :)

I'll be 18 this year and I've never had a girlfriend. And this girl really likes me but I don't think I want to have a relationship yet, so I think I'll wait a few years anyway

Bradm01 · Answer

im 20 nvr been in a Real serious relationship..so don't let it bother you to bad/ its normal...dont let any1 let you think any different...

rachel05 · Answer

im gonna be 20 on sat. and I've never had a legit bf... totally norm hun :)

IMAQT · Answer

Normal id say I had my first bf when I was 17 I believe you have to show your available to get noticed or make the move yourself, otherwise even the most beautiful people stay single

Kendall_123 · Answer

Totally normal in my opinion, I'm 18 and I've never had a boyfriend so I guess we're in the same boat :)

caniaskyousomething · Answer

Nothing to worry about, I'm 16 and never had a boyfriend and I'm not alloud one till I'm 18 anyway. So yeah don't worry ;)

labbie87 · Answer

No worries bro! I'm 21 and haven't had a guy! Hey at least you're bold and ask girls out! It's a start! You'll find someone! =)

Anonymous · Answer

Some girls would rather have the guy ask them out. It's somewhat normal. It doesn't mean their not interested they can just be quite about it. Get out there and let them know. " Hey I'm right here". If a girl doesn't think you're interested in her it'll make it difficult for her to tell you because it's that fear of rejection.

Anonymous · Answer

It's completely normal to focus on school and work and your life before you go try dating. Some people just focus on dating and that's cool too. Don't think too much about it, there will be a right girl who supports you through everything that you do some day

Anonymous · Answer

I'm the same way and I'm a 19 year old girl. It feels weird thinking I still haven't had my first kiss yet but for me, I am more focused on college, my future, and finding myself. I couldn't put someone else's needs way before mine at the moment, and I'm not going to put someone through that.

Hyped_up_on_coffee · Answer

Not really . You just need to get out there and practice

johari · Answer

Ya its normal a lot of college students don't get their 1st boyfriend/girlfriend til college esp shy/awkward people

Anonymous · Answer

Haha well i'm 17 soon 18 and never had a boyfriend and i don't really care! And i suggest you try makinng the first moves girls aren't really up for making them! Just some advice!

LoveLayne · Answer

I never asked out a guy before... maybe you would have had one if you asked on out.

Ryan762 · Answer

In my experience girls don't normally ask guys out usually the other way around

HateBeingSingleAspie · Answer

i hate the standards, expectations girls have in us guys with a huge passion

Anonymous · Answer

I didn't have a girlfriend until I was about 19.  If you like a girl, you'll have to ask her out; girls rarely ask guys out.

art84 · Answer

Normal, your young the right girl will come around. Just keep dating or maybe change up your style and game.

call_me_sarah · Answer

I'm 18 and I haven't had a boyfriend either… I think it's normal though :) don't worry

JanaMæ · Answer

it's normal. once u finish college and find a great job girls would stay in line just to see u ??

Anonymous · Answer

Girls never ask out guys for starters. If you want a girl then you have to make the first move. But its also normal to have never had a girlfriend. You haven't met the right person yet or maybe you're just not looking and thats perfectly fine.

CrazyInWonderland · Answer

Totally normal.. Although I think you are at the time when u should be experiencing and stuff so maybe try to get out more?

Wondering658208 · Answer

Normal some people are lees social than others might as well save yourself for god as long as you've waited

Anonymous · Answer

It's normal and us guys get shut down all the time but no worries. Just be patient and cowboy up.

Lj236 · Answer

sounds normal to me.  I've never had a girlfriend and I'm 19

Anonymous · Answer

I'm sure girls find you attractive, maybe they are to shy to talk to you hahah. It's totally normal! I'm 17 and I'm just starting to hang around guys, it's weird haha

Anonymous · Answer

I'm 21 on college and haven't had a boyfriend all my life ! It's normal just don't settle for less. I'm a very attractive girl and I'm waiting on the best

Anonymous · Answer

If you're busy and aren't going after girls much, they won't come after you. Most girls won't ask a guy out.

rockhaha · Answer

Cause it's the guys job to ask the girls out duh

handsomejackk · Answer

It is normal.  But it doesn't have to be.

stillagoodgirl · Answer

Ya its normal for some people

__Mischa · Answer

hope you can find the best for you

ihatetakingcharge · Answer

it makes me want to say f*** masculinity

Anonymous · Answer

YOu are just 18 it will happen.

Anonymous · Answer

Girls are only interested in money

PunkLadyOfDeath · Answer

Normal (:

NewClassic · Answer

Its OK many people don't start dating until 20s

eaeaea · Answer

It's normal.

Anonymous · Answer

Yea you good ive never had my first kiss and im 17

Anonymous · Answer

Its really normal because my brothers are too

Anonymous · Answer

try being 24

Anonymous · Answer

It's ok

Anonymous · Answer

it's normal

I haven't had a girlfriend my whole life and I'm 18, normal or not?

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