Girl is liking and/or commenting on every single status my boyfriend posts.

[Anonymous]

Pretty plain and simple. This girl keeps liking and commenting on (most) every single status my boyfriends posts on Facebook. We don't have it official on Facebook because we both think it's stupid, but it's pretty obvious we are together due to our posts and pictures. Is it irrational to get upset that this girl is acting like this?

I remember him telling me about her like a couple months ago, he said that she is some fat, goth chick that his friend is banging/dating. I'm worried that she is liking him or something. What do I do?

Updates

+1 y

Turns out she is one of his supervisors and they joke around a lot at work. He said that he is definitely not attracted to her and even thinks she might be lesbian (even though he thinks that she was hooking up with one of his friends). He treats her just like one of his bros, and thinks nothing of it. I still think it's weird that a supervisor is liking/commenting/posting things on his Facebook with such frequency.

[Gone_But_Not_Lost]

Well for starters, if you're getting jealous, remember that it takes two to cheat. If you REALLY trust your man, you have nothing to get upset about, because if he's trustworthy, nothing will happen. He won't make a move on her, and even if SHE makes a move, he won't do anything with it. So, nothing to worry about there. It doesn't matter if she likes him or not, if you really think he's to be trusted, then you have nothing to worry about. Simple as that.

Next, part of this is both your faults for choosing not to make it official. Putting it on an internet profile that you're both in a relationship is like saying "We're off the market. Look somewhere else." and in quite a few cases, stops people from doing things like she's doing. So you want to discourage more people? Make it official. That's what you do.

But as I said in the first place, if you trust him, and I mean really really trust him, fully believing he's trustworthy, then why the hell should it matter? You have nothing to worry about. And don't say "I trust him, I just don't trust her/them" because that's ALWAYS a bullshit line. It's the same thing. If he hasn't cheated before, and has not done anything to make you doubt him, then why question it? Why doubt him? So this girl should not be anything to worry about if you trust him. It takes two to cheat. Plain and simple.

[Asker]

Good point. I have trust issues... always have and I probably always will. He has made it quite clear to me that he is not a cheater and he hasn't done anything that has made me question what he says or does. He is pretty straightforward and trusthworthy. I guess I am just broken :( I don't know how to change my way of thinking without pushing him away or making him mad about this situation. Facebook is already a sore subject for him.

[Gone_But_Not_Lost]

Mind telling me why you have such strong trust issues?

Also, mind telling me why Facebook is such a sore subject for him?

[Asker]

and also, even if we did have it official, how is that to say that she would for sure stop her harassing? For instance, in the most extreme example, if a guy were wearing a wedding ring and is clearly married, that wouldn't stop every single girl. I know some girls who get a kick out of flirting and trying to get with a married man. Some people are just sick.

[Asker]

I have been cheated on in the past. One time I even walked in on it. Facebook is a sore subject because he finds it stupid and I am addicted to it. Our status matters to me and he just doesn't understand why it does. He and his ex didn't make it official until they were together for almost 2 years. The girl he was dating before me actually caused drama between him and I on Facebook too... so he thinks that every time I bring up Facebook, it's a negative thing. idk

[Gone_But_Not_Lost]

You're right, it won't stop some people, and no it's not a guarantee, however it does help. And yes, I will agree, some people still go after someone taken, but I didn't say it was a guarantee. I said it would help in some cases.

[Asker]

If I could make us Facebook official, I totally would. He just has some hang up on it because he doesn't see it as important and he knows that he isn't a cheater. He is a stubborn guy, and I love him for it. I don't need an electronic device telling me my relationship is valid. If Facebook didn't exist, this problem would not exist.

[Gone_But_Not_Lost]

OK, yeah, you've been cheated on in the past, but here's something you should remember. Your boyfriend is not your ex.

[Asker]

Great point. That is why I love him so. He is actually the first guy that has cared about me and has treated me right.

[Gone_But_Not_Lost]

Which is why I think you should keep that in mind. Seriously, I've been cheated on by an insane number of women, and I only wish that was the worst of it that happened to me, but it's not. But I can't hold everyone else for what they did. For example, my girlfriend is the most stable, wonderful, kind, generous, sweet, loving girlfriend ever. She's not my exes in any way. I can't expect her to act like them, or do what they did. She's a different person. What my Exes did is NOT her fault

[tarkan]

"If Facebook didn't exist, this problem would not exist." totally agree with you on this part... A lot of relationship prob occurs from Facebook. This is why I'm glad my boyfriend doesn't even have one. If I'm not living out of the country far from my family? I will close that account either. But don't worry about that girl, she likes him, but it takes two to tango right?

[Gone_But_Not_Lost]

It does take two, yes. Though I think even without Facebook, the jealousy would still be there. You'd just find something else to flip out over. Try telling me that's not true. You said it yourself, you have trust issues because your ex(es?) cheated on you. So I don't think Facebook would eliminate the problem.

[Gone_But_Not_Lost]

Sounds like you're still driving yourself crazy over this. Ahat good you think you're doing like that?

[Asker]

Well this time she posted a picture to his wall, she has never done that before so she is posting more... it just seems weird to me.

[Gone_But_Not_Lost]

Do you trust your boyfriend?

[Asker]

Essentially yes, he has given me no reason not to trust him, but because of past boyfriends, I am hesitant to trust a boyfriend especially if my feelings are involved.

[Gone_But_Not_Lost]

As opposed to a boyfriend where no feelings are involved?

(Boy I sure wouldn't wanna be in THAT kind of relationship.)

[Littletad]

You should be having a conversation with your boyfriend about it. It's him you should be pissed for having a girl in the first place THAT friendly enough to keep doing that. If she was an old "possible dater" in the past, then he needs to delete her or so, as he has you now.

[vlsapril]

I wouldn't say that its irrational to get upset because honestly I would be upset too. although I wouldn't worry so much about it because its not like your boyfriend is flirting with her or anything and from what I can see he doesn't even like it either just ignore it and it should eventually stop.

[Asker]

Should I say something about it to him or just leave it be?

[at_first_sight]

Oh god no! You'll just make things worse, or you'll end up ticking off your boyfriend. Just leave it alone.

[Asker]

ok thank you, you are right... I'll leave it be. I don't want to hurt our relationship over some petty little girl.

[lauramor]

she might like him or just wants to be friends with her guy´s friend. don't worry about it he's with you

[unighted]

Nothing, trust him, He can't help it if the girl is liking and commenting on all of his stuff.

[BoobMan]

Why do you feel threatened by a fat goth chick again?

[BoobMan]

Again, why do you feel threatened by a fat goth chick again?

[Asker]

Not threatened, just my guard is up. I've been cheated on a lot before.

[BoobMan]

Okay, but have you ever been cheated on for a fat goth chick? I mean if the guy's not attracted to the girl, you really don't have much to worry about.

[Anonymous]

Considering you look as good as you do, and you just described her as a fat goth, do you really think she's going to win him over? Relax.

[Asker]

Thank you, I just find it very immature and attention whorish on her end if she is this desperate to go after a clearly taken man.

[Opinion Owner]

And didn't you say she was taken as well?

[Asker]

the last I have heard, yes... by one of his friends

[Opinion Owner]

Whatever, just let it go.

[Opinion Owner]

LET IT GO!

[Asker]

I'm trying believe me

[Opinion Owner]

All evidence to the contrary?

[Anonymous]

It sounds like she likes him. But I wouldn't worry, Clearly, he doesn't find her attractive.

[Asker]

why do you think she likes him? Just by the frequency of her activity on his page?

[Opinion Owner]

Yeah.

[Starnews911]

I feel he should delete her off his fb. If you're not comfy with it, and you've made him aware, nothing more needs to be said. You shouldn't have to say another word. He should just throw her back in the trash, where she came from.

[splavy]

Don't worry about it. If he wanted to be with her he would be with her.

[beastman88]

fb the #1 stalker site

[Asker]

what do you mean?

[Anonymous]

I don't think he wants her, you described her as a fat goth chick.

[Anonymous]

she wants him to notice her