My take on being a 10/10 male
I just read a take that was featured about being a ten of ten guy and I will be honest, it did not sound right. Almost all of the things mentioned to happen were true but it was emotionally void. I am often fairly frustrated due to my level of (potential) attractiveness. I have a hard time readily admitting I am a 10/10 because I struggle with image issues, likely what pushed me to work out and get into bodybuilding as I have; to myself I will never be perfect despite what others tell me.
Relationships and gals;
I am hit on by what would be considered some of the most attractive girls at my University, but in truth it seems as though a lot of girls that consider themselves to be average are too intimidated to approach me. I can see them staring and quickly looking away and sometimes I have even approached them (because I like them!); when I do they almost always reveal that they liked me but could not understand how I could possibly like them. This is very frustrating to me and has led to the downfall of many relationships due to a lack of security on my partners part simply due to the attention I receive. Generally the tradionally "attractive" girls that do approach me have attitude's and egos that I dislike upon getting to know them. I also have tons of woman that have "used" me; by this I mean that they expect me to be the hook up kind of guy and have gotten close to me with the intention of sleeping with me and moving on when I am not really looking for that. Which leads to another issue...
Its better to just let it go away;
Men can not even complain about this sort of thing. Other guys would consider them unmanly or foolish, labeling them as homosexuals simply for not enjoying hook ups. I have been sexually assaulted on multiple occasions and all woman save my current girlfriend have been unable to even admit what has happened to me is sexual assault. With multiple partners I have said I did not want to have sex at the time and would tell them I needed rest and would be down later. Those partners generally act cute, take off their clothes, and act as sexy as they can while I am forced to do my best to not offend them least I be yelled at for "not finding them attractive or not loving them". The scenes have progressed to them reaching in my pants and rubbing my penis while claiming "See you are hard you want it."... Generally I just resign with the realization that I am mostly helpless. I am unable to confide in men, can't explain to my significant other, and judicial forces would not take me seriously... And even if they did I would be labeled as a loser and idiot by every other man in the world. Further, I am touched all the time at bars and clubs without permission; the woman generally praising my muscles and somehow finding that as an acceptable enough excuse. I have had girls kiss me randomly. On one occasion a girl asked to kiss me, I said "no" and she proceeded to lean in and smooch even as I backed up and repeated "NO" and "NO!!!" Progressively louder until she did and made a face at me and yelled "Jerk!" To which all of her friends also insulted me for being a douche and avoided me for the rest of the night. My friends cracked up and said "Only John would yell at a girl to stop kissing him" and found it the story of the night to joke about.
"Hey bro what supplements are you taking?"
Men act in a variety of ways; almost every new guy I meet asks me about the gym and lifting in one form or another. Random men try and fight me or insert themselves between myself and my girlfriend in an attempt to test themselves and discover the level of their own attractiveness. I find men constantly attempt to find ways to tease me or put me down in other ways in an attempt to find ways to elevate themselves socially. They test boundrries to see what they can get away with so they look cool in public. Others do everything to please me and try to be my friend so that they too are "cool". True friends without motive are hard to come by.
Invites thanks guys;
Men more than woman text me as I find they are more aggressive about finding mates; they ask me to join them and hangout or invite me to a party, my only assumption that they think hanging out with me will elevate their sexual appeal.
I am straight;
Gay men constantly nag me as well sending me provocative pictures as well as refusing to let up when I tell them I am not gay. On multiple occasions I have had them ask how much it would cost for me to send nudes, on one occasion "How much to suck your dick?".
Men with girlfriend's always seem to avoid me being around their SO and deepen their voice and push their boundrries when in their presence, especially noted when at the pool or Beach and my shirt is off.
Despite all that I mentioned I still believe I would prefer it to the other extreme, but I certainly believe that those that can be happy with an average body and can accept a partner of average attractiveness will live better/happier lives than those in the "10/10" group. I will mention some of the effects that are positive and the reason I continue to lift and strive despite all of the aforementioned negative.
On freeing oneself;
I was not always attractive. In middle school I was the chubby kid and I understood when jokes were directed at me from across the hallway. I felt every ridicule and rejection like a knife to the back which I consider to be a blessing because I am now able to empathize with those that are now in that position. This treatment causes many different young kids to retaliate in different ways: some integrate into a social group that does not praise athleticism, some devote themselves to schoolwork with a passion noting that they will be the bullies boss one day, others retreat inward and avoid social contact, and some (as in my case) choose to lift. The process was amazing to watch. I got lean fast and then began to put muscle on quickly with a perfect nutrition plan and discipline fueled by a desire to shut up the naysayers, get the girls of my dreams, and never be looked down on again. I could SEE the way that others treated me differently day to day. The body language shift being the most notable as my old bullies avoided looking at me and woman stole glances. I became confident as nobody made fun of me any longer for anything I chose to do... I was able to express my true self by loudly declaring my love for star wars and making weird fashion choices. But the only response was my old bullies also revealing that they liked Star Wars and that it was cool despite having witnessed them knock the Star Wars cards of a good friend to the ground only two weeks hence. I was free. And remain so, and it is beautiful to be unconcerned with my hobbies and decisions being met by the ridicule of others.
The woman of my dreams;
It is hard to complain about not finding a good girlfriend when I did end up with the woman of my dreams thanks to a mutual appreciation of the gym and as she puts it "I just had to touch your abs.". She is way more attractive than myself and could only be defined as a 20/10, but she is empathetic and has a great personality. We both share the same type of story and sit down in the evenings and show each other all the random guys and girls that messaged us acting weird with the intent of stealing us away from the other. For the sake of brevity and the fact that I could gush over her all day... I simply must admit that I would not have the pleasure of her companionship without the looks I sometimes condemn.
Attention... But didn't you say it was bad?;
Despite it sometimes being annoying it is nice to be complimented, and it is nice to always be invited to things. It feels good to have a bunch of people trying to be your friend and have them cheer upon your arrival. It is awesome to start speaking and capture everyone's attention as you tell a story that does not deserve the following snorts of laughter and proclamation of my apptitude for comedy. But, when you are lonely there are always those that want you around... The alternative is a life of unjust loneliness that I could not bare.
Let's Wrap this up
I had no intention of writing this much especially as it was done on my phone. I did not edit the post as it was never expected to be of this size. I doubt anyone will read it full but in the event you do, thanks! At the very least it was nice to vent. I posted Anon but will read and answer comments.
In the end, I could not live life another way. I still choose this life, though I recognize it's pitfalls. I do believe that it is a character flaw however, and wish I could be content with less than striving for perfection. On some torturous days it is hard to find happiness even with the girl of my dreams close by; and likewise, she feels the same. Everyone deserves happiness, and we all must find it in our own way. Most importantly, never consider yourself better than anyone because you are more attractive, or if you did become the bullies boss, or if you belong to an influencial progressive organization that seeks social justice and to eliminate the behaviors of others that lead to the social issues we all must live with. It is not the individuals fault; it is simply their way of coping with the same problems we all face.
A dude wearing a hat