Yeah this is a very serious question, as in the modern day the concept of traditional manliness is demonized and as such many young men lose their way in life.
To have a better idea we must first look at the past. Say what you want, say how you feel you can't deny that historically men have generally been considered the.....expendable gender. Dangerous Labor, Hunting for food, exploring unmarked territory with no guarantee of return and if necessary dying in wars or expected to protect loved ones.
This was expected of them, nowadays however many men are lost and they have no idea where to go in life, in a society that keep telling them that their masculine tendencies and rowdiness is discouraged looked down upon and even considered toxic and as a result they have no real way of letting them out properly, which can lead to disastrous incidences. Sexual harassment, shootings, etc.
So what is a man to do? Should he continue to go full frat boy and defy a society that seems to continue to reject him?.....well no. Despite how how overzealous lots of movements are about combating toxic masculinity, there is some truth to it, and besides that going full macho and acting jock-like all the time will usually backfire and then you just end up looking like an dope
In Contrast, what would be the other route? Disregard masculine traits altogether? Become more feminine and "lady like"? No I don't think so. Going full try guys and having the testosterone of an 85 year old man is not a good way to go about things ok? You need to have some sort of backbone, some sort of drive or ambition, some...I don't know OOMPH to you or nothing is going to get done. There needs to be a look of confidence in you, that you can take care of not only yourself but others, and that you aren't easy to push around.
Ok How about a cold, uncaring engine of logic? Not allowing things like emotions or feelings get in the way of making reasoned decisions. No. Logic must be balanced with emotions. Having too much emotion leads to things like false accusations and mob justice/violence, where as too much logic leads to some people thinking of others as potentially expendable.
So how do you be a man in such an age...I've been thinking about this for months on end. And then i remembered an archetype i absolutely love. The girly tomboy or the tomboyish girly girl. Whichever variant you wanna go with. Point is in most media, this is the kind of girl i tend to gravitate towards. The type that does their hair, dress cute/nice and has the outward appearance of your typical female But generally has hobbies that involve Hiking, Sports and tinkering with machinery.
Look at it this way for me the ideal girl is someone that is like 70% Girly and 30% Manly......so why shouldn't the reverse be true for men? Temper manliness with just a touch of femininity.
Logic with Empathy, Aggressiveness with Caution, Confidence with Humility.
We have to make sure we find a balance between traditional masculinity with elements of compassion and kindness and not be afraid to explore and do what were traditionally views as unmanly things. Bake, Garden, watch chick flicks, what have you. If you like it don't let things like whether its manly or not stop you just DO IT!
I know I'm likely singing to the choir, but i do feel that the concept of what it means to be manly needs to be adapted if its to be seen as anything other then flat out toxic anymore.
I do have views on toxic femininity but...that's a my-take for another time.