So what does this mean? He wants to bang me or not? He wants a relationship or not?

[Anonymous]

OK so i met this guy he is 34 , I am 30... We were going out the first 3 days and he wanted to have sex with me... But i didn't let him b/c it was too soon for me and i had my period. But I did sleep over his house. Then he went away on business for 5 days... When he returned we went out for icecream, while we driving there he asked me if i like kids and whats my dream etc ect... and i said yes i want many kids and a farm etc ect... So at The icecream shop he said out of the blue " I dont want to have sex with you yet because i need to get used to you. Usually when i have sex i dont want to be around the other person after, and i dont want to do that to you" ... It came up very weird to me... After that we went to my place and got hot and heavy and asked to have sex with me and that he forgot condoms... and i said well i dont have any and it won't happen without, plus you said you dont want to have sex. There he pulled two condoms out of his pocket and said "oh i was lying, I DO have condoms!!!

Updates

+1 y

I asked him since you dont want to have sex like that then "Do you have sex at all? a nd if yes when was the last time?" He answered 2 weeks ago with my friend w/ benefits " :/

Updates

+1 y

he keeps saying. about us becoming a couple/example.."if we become a couple ill move up near your house... etc ect... and he's told me that if we had children they would be so light colored bllonde... random stuff which is a little weird isn't it?

[carebearagent]

Yes, it's very weird. He actually likes you and he kind of said it at the ice cream shop. If you have sex with him, consider that guy gone. I don't think that he wants to settle down as of yet, but I do think that he wants to bang you. I wouldn't want to have sex with a guy who answered that he had sex 2 weeks ago with a friends with benefits. I would feel a little funny about that. His goal is to have sex with you, which is why he had the two condoms in his back pocket.
Are you going to take the time out to get to know him and allow him to continue to screw his friends with benefits, or are you going to give him what he wants?

[Asker]

so you think this is a no relationship road?
Im not sure what to do... I did mention his friends with benefits today (just to remind him i remember everything), and he said from the day he met me thats over

[carebearagent]

It could possibly lead into that if you do not have sex with him. He has his friends with benefits and was honest about it. I think that once he is ready to settle down, he will eventually put her down. If you give it up to him then no I do not see him pursuing you. Be careful because he could also turn you into a new friends with benefits, if you decide to screw him.

[carebearagent]

Be his friend and allow him to reveal who he truly is. Do not screw this guy.

[Anonymous]

I'm a guy. I dont want sex because I'm still a little hurt after my ex. its been awhile and after such a long time without sex it almost becomes a painful experience mentally when I try to make a move.

Sure I love sex and want to build something real. Im extremely sexual person within a relationship.

So there's proof that a man can be crazy about sex and then not want to have sex at the same time.

[madhatters4]

he wants sex. he used the whole I don't want to have sex thing to kind of build the idea that he wasn't just about sex. maybe even in his head he doesn't like the idea of just having sex so he is sort of torn... but it's clear he wants sex

his behavior doesn't really sound like a person who wants a relationship. but I could be wrong there

[Asker]

So do i make him wait a month?

[madhatters4]

time isn't going to make him want a relationship, he has to want a relationship. you could make him a month and he'll wait and it won't mean that the sex necessarily means more.

If you want a relationship you need to explain to him that, that is what you want. you don't want casual sex or for him to play games (obviously pick your wording)... but it just needs to be expressed what your expectations and desires for a relationship are

[halafax]

so you find a guy who isn't playing games with you dear.

[TadCurious]

he sounds like a total flake

[Strider90]

What did happen afterwards?

[Asker]

No sex... He txts me all the time and comes by my house... He commented on my house having spiders, and how old it is... WHich it really is old from the 1950s...i offered to cook lasagna for him and he refused bc he said he's very picky about eating and he probably won't like it... although he likes lasagna. Its like he dosnt trust my cooking or something... but he dosnt even know me that well... anyway he said cook anything thats meat...

[Strider90]

hm...
I don't think he really cares about you. I just have this feeling. If you want a relationship forget it.

[Anonymous]

He doesn't care.