Why am I always fuckbuddy zoned?

[Anonymous]

I've come to the realisation that i dont ever get friend zoned... i get bootycall/fuckbuddy zoned!

how do i stop this from happening, even if i dont flirt with the guy he straight away goes to sexual stuff! which i usually when i end the conversation. I've only ever had 1 boyfriend, before him guys only wanted me for sex and now after being single again for almost a month I've noticed that guys only want me for sex once again!!

im a really attractive girl but im also smart. im a model and study law. could this be why?

[Bandit74]

The fact that you're a model probably isn't helping you. A lot of guys might presume your promiscuous and brainless so they might right you off as a fuck buddy. Im sure your aware that models dont have the best reputation, so unfortunately sometimes you are going to be lumped into the same category as the dumb pretentious models even if you aren't one. Also Im not sure what type of modeling you do but if you do nudity or overly sexual pictures, that's also going to be a turn off for a lot of guys. Guys like looking at naked girls but they don't want their girlfriend to be seen naked by other girls. A lot of guys dont like to share, they want their gf all to themselves, so they might see you as fuck material but not necessarily gf material. Guys want a good girl that can be naughty just for them not a girl that is naughty for every photographer that pays her money. Also being a model, your probably around male models, so that might make guys feel jealous/insecure. So you might not be the easiest girl for a guy to put his trust in and be with. I think the number of guys that would fuck a model far outnumber the guys that would want to make a serious emotional investment into one. I dont know what its like for lesser know models but when I look at the more famous models the same thing happens to them, they get tossed from one celebrity to the next. Their relationships and marriages don't last very long. Im not saying your hopeless but I do believe it will be hard for you to find a guy that is 1: Confident and secure enough to be with you 2:Wants to be with you long term 3. Is into you for the right reasons.

[Asker]

i dont do nude, i was a lingerie model for a while but my agency is sending me to more elegant editorial work now. so im just an everyday model. no nude or p*rn type stuff

[Bandit74]

Alright well I guess that part doesn't apply to you. I will say that some guys will want to fuck you just so they can brag to their friends that they slept with a model. Just keep doing what your doing, make it clear that your not into casual relationships, and just wait till you find a guy that willing to get to know you.

[cobrar97]

Well... it's probably because what you ALLOW. If you want respect (and you DO deserve it), then it should be a requirement. If a guy isn't going to respect you, then you need to end that conversation, and future conversation, right away. Some girls (usually insecure) allow themselves to be lead down a path like this by guys that are know just how to spot them. Then those guys work their magic to get the end result you are talking about. Fuckbuddy is a term for something that BOTH parties are wanting... and I don't think that's what you're looking for.
Unfortunately, appearance CAN cause a guy to have a first impression that may be totally false about you... if you message me a picture, I'll give you a 100% honest opinion on if guys are making a visual assumption.
Beyond that... you are a smart woman on her way to the top, and you really need to be getting out of this rut on poor-quality fellas. You deserve something above and beyond those guys that are seeking you out.

[Asker]

https://instagram.com/nadiameissl thats my instagram

[cobrar97]

You're a decently attractive girl... and my guess is that these guys know (assume) too much about you before you ever say a word. Just your instagram alone (to many guys), says un-intelligent beauty-queen flashing her goods to get attention... I can tap that. Now I'm not trying to be offensive, and this is NOT how I think personally. But guys make these quick, stupid assumptions based on what they "see". When a guy sees your pictures, he sees tits and ass... not hard work, dedication, goals, pride, and intelligence. That's why it's sex talk from the word-go.
You don't have to CHANGE anything you're doing... you just need to be aware of what 95% of guys walking up to you are thinking... and be prepared to correct that thinking right away. Or better yet, be prepared to pass that guy on for the one who IS looking for something more than T&A, and is walking up because he sees more in YOU. It's just hard to find those fellas... unfortunately.

[cobrar97]

What's funny... it's just as hard for a nice-guy to find someone like you that's actually interested in a nice guy.

[Asker]

i totally see where your coming from, but how am i supposed to make it clear that i have goals and a future that doesn't involve me being just a sexual object? the guys have have made the effort know that i am studying law etc yet still only try and sleep with me

[cobrar97]

That's a tough one I'm sorry to say. You could hang a sign around your neck and STILL guys won't get it. A guy should be talking to you right, treating you right, be involved with you life, be involved with your family and friends, and CLEARLY be 100% into you BEFORE you panties come off. Being in a hurry doesn't allow you to properly analyze the guy... and they ARE tricky about this :-)
There ARE good guys that will love YOU, your brain, your personality, etc. You appearance will attract all the others though... so I have no specific answer. I'm a good guy and single... so there's your answer.. jk... but I certainly think you CAN get what you want and what you deserve. It's just not as easy as some people have it.

[pineappleshortcare]

I think most guys just throw casual sex out there to see if he gets a yes. It's possible, being into law, that your vibe is geared towards more aggressive, charismatic guys - who may not want to settle down. Try dating into some nurturer fields like education and see what happens.

[sammy_31]

No matter what you do they will keep them doing this because you allow them and don't necessarily stop or avoid it. You should have learned from the first time if you didn't want to be a hook up buddy.

[goodbadguy]

Guys are just horny lol it's not our fault if you're attractive. I mean whenever you & the guy is at the talking stage, guys just like to know how freaky the girl is. So expecting some sexual comments are normal. If he's overly sexual and your not into that with him then by all mean dis miss him. Most of the time when a guy is really attracted to a girl, he does his best not to mention sexuality because he doesn't want to turn you off & scare you away. But if your giving him signals then he'll definitely test it. Signals include the way you're flirting with him (a little sexual way) the way you dress and even winking emoji's while texting lol

[Vashramire]

I'm not sure what the places you're meeting these guys are at but I would try and find a place with guys who are a bit more mature or emotionally secure. A lot of guys are after a bootycall so I'd find a way to dash those dreams of theirs before you get too invested and waste your time. I personally don't see anything about you that would make you more obligated to be a bootycall. I personally don't think of models to be just for sex or dumb so unless you are hanging out with neanderthals you might just be having a spree of bad luck. Keep trying and good luck.

[Jonzor]

You sound awesome! In regards to your question, do these guys know you have had a previous 'fuck buddy' if so they know your up for that. If not then your just meeting too many guys who are talking to you purely because of your looks and not the brain which is much more important!

[Pedantic]

Welcome to the college scene. There is a lot of sex happening. There are a lot of people looking for it.

I don't think you have an "issue" per se getting people for wanting to know you; you are just getting a lot of invitations that is normal for your age and occupations. Your awareness/focus on it may seem to make the phenomena rather acute.

You had a boyfriend once before, right? I am sure you can establish relations with a man when you are ready and get time for it.

[live123]

I think you are a nice girl but the reason this happens is probably that u sleep with the guy too soon... If you want to get a boyfriend dont sleep with him too soon wait like 5 dates and make it clear u want somthing more...
by the way smart and sexy woman is every guys dream ;)

[kheserthorpe]

More men want to sleep with any given woman than date her. This is normal. You're only doing something wrong if you are going forward as friends with benefits hoping it will lead somewhere when there's no evidence it will

[internet_guy]

i am always stranger zoned, never understood that haha, some people are meant to be that way

[Anonymous]

looking at your insta I can see why your just used for sex. You display sex on it in most of your pics. It's the type of girl you'd love to bang but never marry

[Asker]

why because i have 2 sexual quotes and a bunch of modelling photos?

[Opinion Owner]

2 sexual lmao you're boobs are out in almost every pic. And your modeling photos are pretty raunchy. Guess you don't see it but guys do. It's the way you portray your image. That's why

[Asker]

its comes with being a lingerie model.. are you saying Victoria secret models get judged like this from their instagram

[Opinion Owner]

You wear a normal dress and your boobs are hanging out. you objectify yourself. You can use the modeling as your reason aall you want but at the end of the day. I'm telling you the reason why your just looked at and treated like a sex object

[Opinion Owner]

you're

[Asker]

that photo was taken before a nightout. i dont know how girls dress at clubs in america but thats normal where im from. i dont dress like that on an everyday basis. if you look through my photos thats the only dress I've worn where my boobs are that obvious. besides it has nothing to do with how i dress, most of these guys have seen me at uni (fully clothed)

[Bandit74]

Well you're not a victorias secret model... also how many victorias secret models have successful marriages? spoiler alert NOT MANY Adriana lima remained a virgin until marriage, her husbandalledgedly cheated on her and now they are getting divorced, miranda kerr divorce after three years, Heidi Klum divorced. Not many models have marriages that last over 10 years. Models are the girls that every guy wants to sleep with but not nessesarily the one they want to bring home to mom. The types of guys that do marry models are really confident guys with a lot of options. But the thing about those guys is that they have a lot of options and they are confident enough to pursue those options meaning you are likely to be cheated on or replaced. Thats one of the downsides to being a model, your love life will likely suffer.

[Opinion Owner]

There's way more than one photo I can see at least 13 . keep trying to justify it to yourself if it makes you feel better But I tell you this right now things will remain the same. Anyway you don't want help you just want to be right , this is a waste of time.

[Asker]

hahah omg, that is the stupidest thing i have ever read. how many celebrity's/ everyday people get divorced, it has nothing to do with your occupation, which by the way for me is not modelling. im doing it to get through uni, i earn 5 grand for looking pretty for a couple hours. my future is in law and my personality expresses that side of me not the modelling. and im sorry if your really that narrow minded that you think a model could never be in a happy long relationhship. you must be one if those insecure males. and btw. i broke up with my ex. he never cheated nor was he planning on breaking up with me anytime soon. he was even talking about engagment. not all guys are as stupid as you just made yourself sound by making that comment

[Opinion Owner]

Just clarify that's not me that made the comment about the models. I could care less what's going on in their lives

[Anonymous]

most guys want sex first and maybe something evolves from that. at least you are not ugly so nobody want´s to even have sex with you xD

[overcoatandhat]

Think you are giving it up to easily and because of this you set yourself up to be the bootycall

[Anonymous]

The men you're meeting, aren't ready to settle down most likely, while you most likely are

[JSmuve]

How are you sure they only want you for sex?

[Asker]

cause either i tell them i dont do that unless im in a relationship and i never hear from them again or ill sleep with them and they'll turn it into just sex. they would go from texting me everyday about life stuff to only when they want me to come comeover. I've been seeing this one guy who was a pretty good friend of mine and since i slept with him i feel like were not friends anymore and now just fuck buddies

[JSmuve]

Well, that's some pretty irrefutable evidence you have there. What's your personality like?

[Asker]

shy at first but the more comfortable i get with you the weirder i get haha i dont see my self as attractive as people say i am (the modelling and my ex put i big wedge in my self-esteem) im not stuck up at all. i would say im quit damaged aswell, just because its always in the back of my mind wondering wether or not this guy is going to stop talking to me if i sleep with him. or if his just going to date me as atrophy (like my ex)

[JSmuve]

Hmmm, well if I put a girl into the fuck buddy category it means I either don't have time for a relationship or there's something about her personality that rubs me the wrong way.

[Asker]

with my friend, his never had a gf and has a really busy life so i can see why he would do that. but whats everyother guys excuse. im closer with guys than i am girls so i dont think its my personality

[JSmuve]

Guys don't usually like to take their time with really attractive girls. Seeing one just sets off alarms in our brains. It's like all our blood rushes out of our brains and we get tunnel vision. I don't know what to tell you. You're American right?

[Asker]

no, Australian

[JSmuve]

Oh, im actually flirting with the idea of going to school in Australia to get my doctorate. Where abouts are you?

[SkaterDude]

you might be making it easy for guys,