If a guy is willing to travel to see you... does he really love you with all his heart?

[iamtheoneandonly]

I met this guy online and we been talking everyday since August.. we began dating in September... he has a Facebook and instagram with pics and videos of him with friends and family... his voice matches from the video and when we talk on the phone.. so he can't be fake ( my friends think he catfish/fake because he lives in NYC and is sexy) we talked about his past relationships and the time his mom left him as a child and relationship with his dad.. very sad.. one ex broke his heart using him for money and it really caused to lose emotions.. but he says I'm healing his heart and becoming himself again.. sometimes he wonders what I see in him when I can easily date someone locally.. but I choose him.. aww.
but anyway he plans to come see next year during the summer taking the bus.. its a long ride and money he's willing to pay... so do you think he really loves me and that this is true love?

[samit11]

Online dating really sucks to be honest. Id say dont exceed expectations. When you meet him, try analyzing his actions, what he says and how he talks to you.. etc. I am saying that because it can either be true love or true manipulation.. nothing in between. But, I wish you good luck :)

[iamtheoneandonly]

Thanks

[Anonymous]

He's committed to his pursuit of pussy! He will stop at nothing! Like the terminator it can't be bargained with. It can't be reasoned with. It doesn't feel pity, or remorse, or fear. And it absolutely will not stop, ever, until it fuck her right in the pussy!

[iamtheoneandonly]

Really 😐😐😐

[KillerTaco]

LMAO.. I laughed a lot harder than I should have at this...

[saltwater84]

Man will drive /fly/run for miles if they knows there is sex awaiting on the other side.
He does not mean anything darling.
Woman doing the same, would be love. Men it could be love but LUST as well.

don't be impressed by that it is nothing

[iamtheoneandonly]

So this is about sex? So he's coming for sex now? How could it be about sex when he told me he would wait until I'm ready to have sex (not a virgin) this is a contrast to his personality.. i really don't think its for sex because he wanted to meet my mom as well and talk her about me... and he wants to meet the rest of my family.. so a guy who wants sex is interested in meeting my family? Come on

[saltwater84]

darling, there is no offence here, i am here too :)
but , if you are confused enough to be asking people on GAG about a man , you know what that means? that means there is something you are not so sure about , no?
Men are very specific creature.. when they want sex , they will lie, they will try to amaze you , they will compliment you and so on.. you have no idea what i and other woman have heard from men in our life, i am 30 and i am not even done yet, i am still always surprised by their creativity haha.
Have him wait as much as you need.
don't buy everything a guy says , i see you under 18 , so i just advise you really.
test him on the long run.5 months ago i met a man , that was a crush, both side , after a month, i was looking for a place he ask me to move in with him. i did not (thanks god) after a month and a half that i wanted to go to his place he was embarrassed , i ask why and he reply "my Gf is in my bed , she moved in with me as she have nowhere to go now "GF?

[saltwater84]

and he was like not even feeling guilty "well , i like you more though, with her it is uneasy with you i am in a dream blablabla " i could not believe it.
Yet he call me every 2 weeks to try to rekindle haha. men are so funny my dear, when its not the right one, and that they want something.
He even says "i think she cheat on me " just to feel less guilty.
historic hahaha

[iamtheoneandonly]

I'm not confused about anything.
I just want people opinions.. but sexual predator opinion is way out of line.. this guy even talked to my mom once on the phone.. he knows that my brothers know of him.. we've been talking for months now..5 months.. he's meeting me June of next year.. a guy will wait that long for sex? Really.. it has to be more than that

[iamtheoneandonly]

And I'm actually 21

[iamtheoneandonly]

A guy that wants sex that bad will not talk a future with a girl... he talks about it with me.. he even cries about the fact he can't hold me.. he sounds serious about it... i can tell what is fake.. we talk every single day and about how what we plan do when he meets me.. like go out to eat.. etc..

[saltwater84]

Darling that he speak o your mum means nothing , a guy who had a GF and cheating on her full , with me (without knowing) met my mum and dad and sister for dinr and he was really excited about this , and he would show me he care in very possible way he cried as well , when i told him off , my life , and he still ramping now after 6 months.. but how funny he is still with his Gf.

also, he is not waiting on you , willing of waiting for sex in anyway , there is other girls my dear , guys are up to wait on the long run when they are not attached to someone, , in June he will meet you and will have sex with you and before June he will have have sex with other women as well.. as you said , he is sexy , not desperate and single.

i don`t know why you ask advice if you have already a strong opinion on your storie , at the end of the day it is your storie so if you think you have elements to says he care. you dont need advice then. and just think for yourself then.

[iamtheoneandonly]

Wow.. smh.. so there are no good guys in the world.. everything is about sex and you are comparing him to the guy you had by saying he met your family too.. and we are not having sex when he comes.. he is spending time with me.. you really telling me this based off your experience with your guy.. yeah I do have a strong opinion and I'm am looking at other opinion.. but the opinion that his motive is sex is not something I would look into based off of what I know about him.. which is way more than I provided in the posted question... but I'm not having sex and he even told me that we are not going to do it.. if he's looking to fuck he would have been at my doorstep months ago..

[GingerBiscuits]

Not true, it's all imaginary until you're living around each other a minimum of 6 months. Right now it's all peachy cos real life can't intrude and you use each other as safety blankets.

[misupanda]

Not necessarily. I met a guy online and he travelled to see me. Money is definitely not an indication of love. He ended up cheating on me with his little sister. :|

[iamtheoneandonly]

Its not about the money.. its the effort.. is my point.. i know him for 5 months and we spend everyday talking on the phone through night and into the morning.. he asks about my day and calls me beautiful and says he loves a lot in one day.. how long did you know that guy... how was the relationship?

[misupanda]

Well, he put a lot of effort into it. But a lot of guys probably would for sex. It was clear when he arrived what he wanted. They way he acted with me. He made me really uncomfortable. I knew him for about a year. The relationship was... rocky. Because of his sister. She treated me terribly, but smiled as if she loved me. But behind the scenes, she would try to sabotage us. In the end, she did.

[iamtheoneandonly]

So you think my guy is like the one you had... he told me he isn't gonna do anything.. and if I don't want to do it.. he won't force me.. and he also he wants to meet my family.. what guy who wants just sex is interested in meeting my family.. plus he already spoke with my mom and my niece and I witnessed with my ears.. he wants to get to know my brothers too..

[misupanda]

Well, no. I didn't say that. I'm not saying to assume anything about your boyfriend. But I am saying not to go into it blindly. My guy knew that I had past sexual abuse that made me extremely uncomfortable around guys in general, let alone intimately. He said he wouldn't do anything and appeared like a gentleman. He was far from it. I'm saying that people online can say anything for any reason, and it can very likely be a lie. So you just have to be prepared and not do anything that could be a potential danger to you (going somewhere private when you first meet). He might be a nice guy. But I'm saying that with my situation, the guy clearly didn't love me, even though he said he did and pretended he wouldn't do anything. With you, he might love you. But there's no correlation with travelling to see you and loving you. If you think about it, some child molesters travel to different states to find their prey. Or maybe he just sees potential with you? Good luck!

[misupanda]

I also just saw your age range. I'm not sure of your age, but since you're below 18, I would advise not meeting with him yet. You can maintain a relationship online, but meeting someone online at that age... it's not a good idea. When I talked about past sexual abuse, that's how it started. From meeting someone online. Also appeared like a perfect gentleman. He would abuse me very badly, videotape it, and sell it as child P*rnography . That's how bad it can get. But I was a preteen/teenager who went into it naively and thought he was truthful and wouldn't hurt me. Biggest mistake of my life. I truly advise waiting until you are 18. Especially if your friends think he's a catfish. Please, please think before you do this.

[iamtheoneandonly]

My friends says he is catfish based on the fact that he lives far away that's it.. they don't check his Facebook.. his instagram like I do... clearly not catfish.. his voice matches videos of himself.. his past life with girl are on there.. many things that prove he isn't catfish and I'm actually 21... i think my age range changed because I been making anonymous posts too much

[dexter_a]

Well from what've you described him by , it doesn't seem to be true love. He's just probably visiting you to see how things would workout between you both since you've been just talking to eachother online all this while. There's also a decent chance that he does really love you and wants to consider this relationship for real by attempting to create a physical connection by visiting you. So dont expect anything it could turn out anyway , keep an open mind. :)

[iamtheoneandonly]

We've been talking on the phone for 4 months now... online was only in August

[dexter_a]

Yeah it includes phone too :P unless you see someone physcially and get to know them that way things dont work even though you Skype whatsapp call on phone. So be patient dont expect anything if he's meant to be, he will be :) All the best.

[zinithin]

No he doesn't love you, he's never met you. That's crazy talk. He might like you enough to visit you.

[iamtheoneandonly]

So when he cried and said that he loves me that wasn't real? and he doesn't cry easily because the heart break he had with ex was ugly and it left him cold hearted

[iamtheoneandonly]

So your saying because he never met me personally he doesn't love me.. but we been talking everyday since August.. but he can't fall in love unless he sees me?

[zinithin]

I think he's living a fantasy, and he might think that he loves you.

[iamtheoneandonly]

Wow ok... so a guy who talks to me everyday on the phone is living a fantasy but is making an attempt in reality.. ok whatever you say.. ill keep an open mind

[zinithin]

Infatuation and love are not the same thing my dear. But yeah he's making an effort.

[iamtheoneandonly]

Alright

[iamtheoneandonly]

There's is a lot that I didn't mention in the post.. but he wants to meet my family too... he wants to talk to my mom about how he feels about me... love or infatuation?

[zinithin]

How old is this guy, and how old are you?

[iamtheoneandonly]

I'm 21 and he's 28 but I asked this question under anonymous so I could be anonymous not because of underage reasons

[zinithin]

So this 28 year old wants to show up and explain to your parents how he loves you and cares for you even though he's never really spent any real time with you? Doesn't that just sound absurd?

[zinithin]

Do you still live with your parents? Do your parents know he's coming?

[iamtheoneandonly]

No it doesn't because we been talking for almost 5 months.. every single day.. hours on the phone.. thats time spent.. checking on me.. asking me about my day.. staying up through the night till morning talking.. but you wanna say it doesn't matter because he can't what? Touch me? He even told me that he's sad because he can't hold me... he can fall in love with my personality... in love with a body is infatuation.. he loves my personality.. can that be possible? He wants to see in real life and he making the effort to see me.. meet my family and spend physical time

[iamtheoneandonly]

Everyday he tells me he loves me to the point it gets annoying... we laugh.. he tries to make me jealous. etc to me its like any relationship except the fact the were both far away from each other but he wants to change that

[zinithin]

He sounds like a sexual predator. Have you ever considered that it's all an act, and that maybe just maybe he's lying to you? Just because he's telling you these things doesn't mean he's being truthful... he might be a master manipulator, has that ever crossed your thoughts?

If you still live with your parents and haven't experienced this world. I implore you to not follow through with this. One reason is that the meeting of parents and 28 year old who wants to date their daughter is not going to end well. Another is this guy doesn't seem very mature for his age, to the point where it's almost creepy!

I'm a third party here. I have nothing to gain to tell you this is a bad idea. And this sounds like a bad idea. What you do is ultimately up to you.

[iamtheoneandonly]

A sexual predator really.. no I don't think so.. there is a lot that you don't know that I would like to say but its a lot... but there is no way this is an act.. no way and I'm not stupid either.. everything he told me about himself is not lies.. he has two younger brother and sister. and I hear them in the background on the phone all the time.. the night when we were on the phone his grandmother passed away and he was crying his eyes out.. he posted obituary on social media and all his friends comment on it.. who lies about this... there is a lot still not said... people he mentions to me.. i hear their names being called in the background by his mom.. this cannot be lies.. a sexual predator please really. Pictures of him and his ex are Facebook on her page and his.. he talks about how she treated him bad.. but this is lies? No way

[iamtheoneandonly]

And he doesn't try to control me.. thats crazy.. we talk like regular people

[iamtheoneandonly]

And he has talked to my mom before on a 3-way phone call.. all three of us.. she knows of him already and she agreed on him coming to meet me.. would a sexual predator wants others to know about him see that where that starts to fall off.. because he never at all asked for my address out of the 5 months we been speaking.. never asked for nude pics.. a sexual predator would want that eagerly.. he has talked to my niece under my supervision.. he didn't know he was on speaker phone... she almost slipped up with our address with her young mind and he didn't ask for it.. he told her that he didn't want to know about that.. see some sexual predator really.. i even speak to his younger siblings on the phone

[iamtheoneandonly]

And yes I live with my parents still and my mom knows about him not my dad.. but he wants my dad to know but at the same time.. he just worried because of his past relationships with girls and their fathers.. he wants to get know him as well and hang out with my brothers

[Curmudgeon]

He might be infatuated with you. In any case, you will find out when you meet him.

[iamtheoneandonly]

Ok thanks

[iamtheoneandonly]

Well if he's interested in meeting my family and talking to mom about how he feels about me.. is that considered infatuation or love?

[Curmudgeon]

That IS more serious. Good luck to you both!

[iamtheoneandonly]

I didn't see those two questions.. but yes I live with them and my mom knows about him not my dad.. but he will find out

[iamtheoneandonly]

Oh I didn't mean to comment here sorry

[KillerTaco]

That or he desperately wants the "P".

[iamtheoneandonly]

He's too sexy to be desperate I'm sure

[iamtheoneandonly]

But I don't think he messing around tho either lol