Hi I am a catholic women from Ireland, dating a Muslim man from Pakistan,we have been dating almost a year now and everything is going great,I'm so much in love with him and he tells me I'm the best thing that happened in his life,he respects my religion as I do with his,he allows me to eat pork,never would stop me,he even offers to buy it for me ,he also drinks alcohol and takes me out for drinks,we have been talking about getting married and having kids together which I am totally happy with as we get on so well together and I can see myself spending life with this man and he says the same! we have had our conversation about when we have kids together and we both agreed that they would take the Muslim religion but would get baptised,holy communion and confirmation and celebrate Christmas respect to me,we talked about how we would do our wedding,we would get married in Europe with the European wedding style but would travel to Pakistan to celebrate with his family,he said he would never ask me to convert to Muslim religion,only if I wanted to,that its up to myself to decide!which I thought is fair,all of his family know about me,i have spoken to all of them over Skype and they all seem like down to earth people,they where so happy to see me and I got on really well with all of his sisters and mum,and they are all so happy for us,end of this year we plan on getting engaged,i am so excited,and we plan on visiting his country which I look forward to meeting all family face-to-face,so my point of story is don't compare all Muslim men to be the same just because you heard of a story that didn't work out because there not,their is all different type of Muslim men and my story explains that..and if you keep reading story about negativity,and bad about Muslim men,your relationship won't work out..if your happy with him and he makes you feel it,and you can spend life with this man don't listen to anything thing else but your heart ,and only you know what your heart is feeling ,i hope my story makes anyone with doubts feel better and don't always judge a book by its cover,now happy living and I wish best of luck for your future :)
In regards to your question, I will give you an answer according to my experience...Please take it seriously and think about it...Your heart alone is not going to be able to make the best decision for you.
I am a Catholic Latin woman, living in the US and married to a Muslim man. I have a dog, and although when we first began dating and even when we became engaged, my husband said that he agreed that the dog would continue to live with me; my dog is not leaving with me...because his parents would disagree. We are presently pregnant with our first child. Although, I've known for quite sometime that should we have children, they would be Muslim; I did not ever considered that an issue - as it has become - my faith in Christ has suddenly become stronger and I fear that in marrying him, I made the wrong decision for my baby.
We are now fighting every day about what name the baby should have...He wants the baby's name to be Arabic, which I am fine with; however, his family has Xd a few names I like because they are "too Catholic." In their mind, the name has to be Arabic-Muslim. A Spanish name is out of the question for them...I feel like they think my baby belongs to them and quite frankly, that is unbearable for me.
Things were not always this way...Initially, he went against his parents wishes and proposed to me; however, eventually, they agreed with his decision with the small caveat that things would be done the Muslim way - in my home! I was out of that arrangement, but little by little I have come to understand that they are making decisions for me.
I feel like there are more than he and me sleeping in our bed...I am now pregnant, an early accidental pregnancy, and I feel that I am way too deep...I wish I was at the point where I could choose again...
Intercultural marriages are hard enough, add religion and you might as well declare yourself in war...You cannot have a healthy life under said circumstances. Consider yours and make a selfish decision thinking of your future...
I love my husband so very much, but at this point - I doubt he is happy, and I definitely am not!
User121 I can relate to you in so many levels.. Although I'm still dating my muslim bf, he's from UAE and I'm from india.. we tend to have the weirdest fights and even after meeting his family and dating for 4 years he still says our relationship is complicated and his parents need to be whole heartedly happy and accept decision he is about to make.. I'm catholic and do not tend on changing my religion and could use your advise on how you cope with everything, I love him so very dearly and I know he loves me too.. But I just don't know if I am making the right decision in wanting him to marry me.. Because in my head I seem to think I can deal with the whole differences and culture but in reality I don't know if I could..
I have no one to guide me on this because everyone I ask for advice is just as clueless as I am.. How did you manage the initial years? And do you always have to be the one to make sacrifices because his religion doesn't permit him to do many things?
I used to get along with my Moroccan bf. I am a Catholic also central american girl. Que tal?
Listen, seriously. this guy changed and I mean CHANGED once I became pregnant. I could not eat pork, could not HAVE pork around the house, could not drink, could not celebrate Christmas and could never ever hang a crucifix in our home. The names of our kids had to be from a weird Muslim list. Our kids had to be Muslim and he started teling me I had to cover up. The whole thing started spinning out of control and it just became really hard.
I had to compromise in EVERYTHING I ever wanted in the future. Even the day of the dead became a mine field.
It is very hard to be told constantly what you can or cannot do. Ultimately, it depends on his character too. My ex was very controlling and not tolerant enough. I thought he was, when we were hanging out as boyfriend and girlfriend, it was nice. He even drank wine and ate at Mc donalds and Nandos. (non halal food) He also started praying 5 times a day. He had ONE day a week free and he used it to go ALONE to the moque. Once I had kids no food that was not Halal was ok. And that also applied to the kids. Whenever we went out they couldn't eat anything other than fish and this is usually me and the kids- he was not there EVER.
I once forgot completely and ate a hot dog and tehy had one too and even thought of getting one for him and then suddenly a horrible feeling filled my gut- hot dogs- not halal! As you can imagine my kids told him and he ended up shouting at me horrible things. Honestly, if I was you I would just date a nice guy who isn't THAT much into religion. Avoid the tons of extra conflicts involved. Or lie. Once my kids went to a party and they were told the chicken was halal. It wasn't. I kept my mouth shut because he would have just caused a huge scene and the kids already had eaten the food. By the way, that friend was HIS not mine.
Huge mistake, don't do it if he isn't willing to compromise or at least acknowledge what sacrifices you are making.
My ex only said ''That is what women are supposed to do''
The end.
Omg this is so crazy and may be my future I am 17 he's 21 he's muslim I'm not I am spanish and was raised catholic but I do not subscribe to that religion or any...ive noticed he cancels your date if he wants to go to the mosque and I want a long realtionship with him becasue he's not controlling and he's perfect to me I don't know if his parents will ever accept me which means he might not in the future..since he listens to them I'm abt to go to college and his in college but I don't know if our future be like this?...
It depends on how much you depend on your relationship with our heavenly father. It could work but you will probably have to convert religions, mostly because you will anyway. Women naturally follow guys leads, and if our boyfriend smokes pot we smoke pot- not all the time but generally yes. When your in any relationship with someone especially a close personal relationship you will allow the other to influence your beliefs.
Are you willing to question your beliefs? Are you willing to trade it out for something different?
One of my friends was in a relationship she was Christian and he was atheist, after a while she became atheist. Just like living with your friends they influence what you wear or who you go out with.
I hope I made sense, and apologize if I didn't. It is just a matter of who you are and who you will follow.
Doesn't always happen that way. A friend of mine (who is Catholic) got engaged about a year ago, and her fiance (raised Protestant, but pretty nonreligious) just became Catholic in preparation for their wedding. So it does occasionally go the other way around. But that was a more subtle change than switching religions entirely.
Generally speaking you are going to have to work with what he wants and what you want. If he is really conservative you are going to have issues with certain things. Middle Eastern culture is a bit closed off. However from what I know about Morocco they are pretty cosmopolitan, however its really a matter of the guy you are dating.
If he is serious about you and your relationship then he will marry you. You two just need to talk things out and see where the two of you stand. If I married a girl who was Latina I would make it a point that my kids spoke both Arabic and Spanish. Because its part of their heritage. If he accepts that you are Catholic and are good with your faith then sure. Mind you Islamically speaking it would be preferred that you converted, but I know plenty of people who married who did not. Just you won't be able to get married in a mosque. But thats really up to him. If he wants to marry you then he will work with you. Also you have to take into consideration his family, how conservative are they. If they are going to be against it then thats an uphill battle you are not going to enjoy. But at the same point if he stands next to you, his family will get over it. If they are more open minded and just want to see him happy it won't be that big of a deal.
This boils down to you need to talk to him, see what he wants long term, or is he just riding along til someone back home is available for him.
Wow that's basically on two ends of the spectrum. How serious is he about his religion how serious are you? You really have to think about if you have kids what religion will the go towards. I know much about the muslim religion and it's affiliation w/catholicism and non of it really good. Stuff like the Crusades (which wasn't about killing muslims but to repel them from christian countries after they had invaded) brings a real issue at hand. I would seriously discuss this with him because if not now it will become an issue later. Right now it may be at the point where he is ok w/you being catholic and you are ok with him being muslim but it will hit a snag.
This is difficult with either of you trying to convert the other one. If he is more lax and willing to discuss the catholic side of things then try that. There are many good resources out there, Heck you could even ask me, but it's hard when you have to question something that you grew up on.
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From the responses I'm reading here.these people seem really ignorant about islam. I'm muslim and I'm going out with a baptist girl.In the beginning (5 years ago) I liked her and she liked me but when she asked me out I said no because I was afraid of the religion.We finally started going out two years ago and I love it. Its great I love her so much, I could never connect with anyone as much as her.Its not the religions that you will have a problem with it is the culture. Islam and Catholicism are similar and you don't have to convert to islam.but you will have to cope with his culture. It really depends how much you love him and if you believe that there is only one person for everyone.I don't know what I am going to do with my girlfriend, I know I cannot marry her because she is a different culture She can't speak my native tongue my kids will look different, but at the same time she is a better "muslim" then most real muslims are.shes a great christian and has a good relationship with god and I don't want to take that away from her. In Islam Men can marry people of the book (jews or christians) but the main problem is his culture you will have to deal with. You can make it work.its tough.I wouldn't worry about the religion its ok for him to marry a christian.but is it ok for you to marry a muslim? Read more about islam, realize what your getting into. If you really really love him, and you have had bad experiences with men and you don't think you will be able to connect with anyone then focus on fixing the clash of his culture and yours.not so much religion
I agree with you ,my brother.
So then why waste your gfs time if your not planning anything serious with her? Lmao ridiculous
Actually you can marry her. Its a matter of if you really love her like you say you do. If you did you can work around it.
You are making excuses. I've had this talk with my parents and they dont care if whomever I marry isn't muslim. You can teach her your native tongue and your kids as well. So Good advice to the poster about what to do, but bad form in saying you are dating a girl who you can't marry. Simply put I know plenty of Muslim men who married non muslim women and they make it work.
i had the same situation. my boyfriend is islam and im a catholic. i dont care about religion as long as were gonna work things out. but cam to the point where he want me to sacrifice something.. its like choosing between him and his culture or my god,
sad thing is, if i choose not to leave my god. then he's the one who wil break up with me :(
i dont know what to do i have the same situation i have relationship with the guy he is a muslim and im a catholic , we love each other he loves me very much but we can't be together its because of his religion and culture and his family doesn't like me its because of my religion. i dont want to lose him but i have no choice,
honestly i have the same situation im a moslem boy and she is a catholic girl i love her so much and she loves me too but her parents dont her to be with a moslem specially when im older than her by 4 years i guess all what my family will worry about is that she will make me change my religion or take me away but i know that she respect me and my religion at the least i will do my best to be with her whatever problems was but when u talk about if its work or not i guess its about how much u love each other for me yes bc she is all what i want in this life i think i will study languages for have the chance to go and finish my study in her country and then i will have the chance to change my gf's family opinion about me and islam for u all here that love each other plss don't waste ur love of live its just happen one time in live when u love each other nothing metter religion race culture... all love A
I GREW UP IN A HOUSE WITH A PALESTINEAN, MUSLIM FATHER AND MOTHER WHO IS ITALIAN AND CATHOLIC AND I CAN SAY I FEEL I HAVE THE BEST OF BOTH WORLDS. I AM MUSLIM, BUT MY FATHER AND I BOTH GO WITH MY MOTHER TO CHURCH ON SUNDAYS, BOTH MY PARENTS ARE OPEN MINDED PEOPLE. THEY ARE STILL MARRIED AND SO MUCH IN LOVE. MY FATHERS FAMILY ACTUALLY CELEBRATES EVERY HOLIDAY WITH US-CHRISTMAS,EASTER, AND MY MOTHER CELEBRATES THE MUSLIM HOLIDAYS AS WELL. I GREW UP BELIEVING IN SANTA AND MY FATHER NOT A PROBLEM WITH IT HE ACTUALLY PLAYED SANTA. IT DOESNT MATTER WHAT RELGION OR RACE YOU ARE ITS HOW THE TWO OF YOU FEEL WHEN YOUR TOGETHER, BUT I WONT LIE IT MAY BE A STRUGGLE IT DEPENDS ON HOW STRICT HIS FAMILY IS AND HOW CLOSE HE IS WITH HIS FAMILY. I KNOW PEOPLE WHO HAVE HAD YOUR SITUATION EXACTLY AND IT WASNT EASY AT FIRST BUT EVENTUALLY THE FAMILIES WILL COME AROUND AS LONG AS THEY SEE HOW HAPPY THE TWO OF YOU ARE. IF YOU ARE SERIOUS ABOUT HIM YOU NEED TO DISCUSS WITH HIM ABOUT YOUR FUTURE AND IF HE HONESTLY TELLS YOU THERE IS NONE ASK WHY AND IF HE SAYS RELIGIONS AND FAMILY THEN YOU NEED TO MOVE ON LIEK THE GUY BELOW ME SAID I KNOW A GIRL WITH THE SIMILAR SITUATION WITH THIS GIRL FOR YEARS AND HAD HER FOOLED HE WAS MUSLIM SHE WAS POLISH AND SHE THOUGHT EVERYTHING WAS FINE AND LITTLE DID SHE KNOW UNTIL THE DAY OF HIS WEDDING HE WAS GETTING MARRIED TO A GIRL FROM OVERSEAS. IT ALL DEPENDS ON THE GUY YOUR WITH AND IF HE REALLY IS WILLING TO FIGHT FOR IT OR NOT. DONT GET ME WRONG HE MIGHT AT FIRST NOT BE WILLING BUT THATS BECAUSE OF FEAR DONT LET FEAR FOOL YOU INTO BELIEVEING HE DOESNT LOVE YOU! JUST BE PREPARED FOR WHAT EVER COMES YOUR WAY BUT I KNOW IT CAN WORK IF YOU BOTH WANT IT TO. THERE MAY BE DRAMA BUT IN THE END THE DRAMA MGIHT BE WORTH ITS JUST UP TO YOU BOTH TO DECIDE IF THE DRAMA IS WORTH IT FOR THE TWO OF YOU CAUSE AALL WARS MUST END AND IT WILL END!
I agree
I am Black and Mexican. My father is Baptist and my mother is Catholic. I have had the most wonderful childhood, and my parents are still together after 40 years of marriage, and at the time they got married it couldn't have been the most worst time for a black man to be married to a mexican woman, but somehow they have built strength together against ignorance with each others love. My mother loved my father so much, and when her whole family didn't approve of the man she wanted to marry, she completely walked away from her family. Her family is really ignorant, and wouldn't accept my father for the person he was, they only saw skin color, and they told my mother it would never work, and after 40 years, 3 children, and 6 grandchildren they are still waiting for it not to work. I wish you luck and I know your children will be beautiful.
i knew a girl who dated a muslim guy . . they were together for 5 years and everything seemed serious but when the time came down to pop the question, she was the one who asked him, and he told her that under no circumstances would his faith allow him to marry a non-muslim woman.
Hi. My boyfriend is marroccan as well and I am from Italy. we go on very well, since he is not very religious - and I am not. I consider myself Catholic and he considers himself Muslim - but we live it a in a "modern" way. If you love each other, religion is not a matter! :-)
and yes, I#ve only had great experiences so far!
well if you want to get married you have to marry him in an islamic ruled country, otherwise, for HIM, your marriage will be considered 'almost' haraam. I've done my islamic research because as an atheist I wanted to know if I could marry a muslim, you're in a hell of a better position than me, as even in an islamic country marrying me would be haraam.
It all depends on how muslim he is I suppose.
A friend had a Muslim BF. She could not touch his Koran. She had to convert to Islam if they kept on being together. In the end, it got nasty when those issues came up. Although she's not the most devout Catholic by a long shot, she left him. If religion is not even part of your daily life, it'll come up some day. You might as well stay receptive to such signs - if they ever appear. My opinion, Catholic know what the true faith is - and how to live it - peace. Hence the reason why a true Catholic won't marry pagans, Mohammedans nor protestants - but live with them they can and obviously benefit from the experiences they bring.
My boyfriend is muslim and Im catholic we love each other we spent time together. but one day he ask me about religion. He ask me if Im willing to convert into muslim so that he can marry me I can't answer it in rush it takes alittle time to think hard but i love my boyfriend.. help me i need advice
If you really love him and he loves you, he needs to be patient and you need to be honest. Tell him I will read about islam and its teachings and if I am really convinced then yes I will follow it. If not then I will raise all my questions. Ask Jesus for guidance and talk to him " Jesus if its true what muslims say that your complete message is what Mohammed came with, Islam, then guid me toward it and make me find the light you want me to find. If not then leave me as I am." This means you will do your best to find the true path. And if you go look at christianity and Islam they are very very similar even in Food and what to eat and what not. I hope you find guidance and you both have happiness all over your life. Watch videos on youtube for Ahmed Deddat and Zakir Naike. They both answer questions in a nice way with proves.
It's beyond culture and religion! It's all about having faith and if he truly loves you culture shouldn't be a issue, at the end of the day you both have to compromise.
Muslims are rigid or flexible to various extent. So it all depends what kind of a Muslim you acquaint with. In theory, Muslim faith does not allow to marry outside the faith - PERIOD.
i'm from the Philippines and here it's a must that the girl if she's not a Muslim converts to become a Muslim if they want to get married..
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