My boyfriend doesn't give me enough attention, what should I do?

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend barely pays attention to me when we're apart. We're in a long distances relationship so we're apart often. We see each other once a week or sometimes every two weeks. Sometimes he texts me Good morning, and checks on me once late in the day, but that's it. I'd like for him to talk to me more or check on me more often, but no. I feel like he's on Facebook more than he talks to me. In the past, he'd be on FB liking pictures of other girls rather than responding to a message from me. Other guys give me more attention than my boyfriend and I hate it. I only want attention from him. We've talked about this, but I only see a small change. He gives me a bit more attention, but still less than I deserve.

I could dump him, but I'd rather not. I have feelings for him, and I want to be with him. Also, a part of me thinks that this is just his personality. He claims that's it, and that he really wants me. I'm very confused and not sure what to do.

[Anonymous]

My boyfriend is kinda similar, but the difference is that we may see eachother once a month or once two months, also long distance. And yes, here is almostly the same, rarely texting me, not enough emount as i would like to or as it is prefered in a relationship. In my situation i figure it out that he is not texty person, not social maybe and whats moreover he doesn't cares about communitating, because as he said he likes more face to face talking.
In my opinion seeing eachother once a week is normal ( besides i dont think so its long distance rlationship). Whats more, you should pay more attention how he treats you when you are together, if its great then dont worry.

[Asker]

In my situation my boyfriend is very social, he can get along with anyone. He does treat me well when we're together, and always brings me around his friends. He even wants me to meet his mother, maybe he's just not a texter as well.

[Opinion Owner]

Its good he wants to show you, he is serious about you.
But if it still bothers you, you should talk with him to know the reason why he is so distant when you both are not together, because If you say, that he is very social, i think it wouldn't be a big problem for him to contact you more.

[Asker]

I have, he says it's him, not me, that it's hard for him to focus on his phone.

[Opinion Owner]

Well hope its true. If he is not texting with others more than with you its fine :)

[Asker]

I hope it's true too. I noticed when we hangout he doesn't really use his phone.

[Anonymous]

Have you tried... talking to and messaging him first? It may be that he's busy/distracted, and just doesn't have the time or attention to write the first message.
If you want to talk to him, make an effort to do it. It shouldn't all be on him.

[Xelebrum]

Exactlyyy

[Asker]

Yes I have, but I felt like I was bothering him so I stopped. I do everything else to show him I care, and all he has to do is text me.

[Opinion Owner]

Did he say it was bothering him? Or did he seem distracted and unable to talk much? Because that would point even more towards him being busy and, yknow, distracted.
It sounds like you're assuming an awful lot about his intentions and feelings, without having much, if any, proof. The best idea would be to sit down next time you're together, and have a talk about how you're feeling. Don't be accusing and don't make it all about you. Include his feelings as a large factor.

[Asker]

No, he didn't, but he'd randomly stop texting back so I assumed he was. Truthfully, he's always distracted and his mind switches focus easily.

[Opinion Owner]

That's a good indicator that he's busy and distracted. Don't take it so personally. If you want to talk to him, talk to him. If it bothers you, tell him. Not everyone can have lengthy conversations via text. Organise a time every 1-2 days to chat over the phone or Skype, but don't expect him to drop everything to reply to your texts immediately.

[Asker]

I don't, I understand he's busy or easily distracted. I only want him to talk to me a little more within a day.

[Anonymous]

First of all you should fix your own problem. Why do you need all that attention? You may have self-esteem problem and it's not the responsability of your partner to fix it.

Secondly, it doesn't matter how and how much he texts you. Text messages don't mean anything. What really matters is how he treats you when you see him, actions speaks louder than word and you should know it.

Thirdly, as other said, you should communicate with him, but have in mind that if you're wrong, it will be really annoying for him if you have those insecurities flaws too often and if you're right, it won't change anything.

[blues42]

Ask him if he still has feelings for you, a guy will make time for anyone he truly likes someone and devote at least some attention to his girlfriend. It seems odd that he doesn't however a very distinct possibility would be that because he sees you less he is most likely distracted by other people and things going on, I think having more time with him would improve things for sure but if that's not a possibility you could use Skype or facetime to talk to him as it may feel more personal. Just my thoughts

[Asker]

He said he has feelings for me and that I'm the most important woman in his life. He gives me "some" attention, but again not as much as I like or think I deserve as his girlfriend. Unfortunately, we're both in school so the weekends are the only times we can spend together.

[blues42]

Yeah thats good then about being in school because that could be the only reason why he isn't as responsive, personally I have not responded to a girl cause I've felt as though I might be too distracted by the conversation to do anything else, just a thought.

[Gooseman]

Your suspicions are most likely right about him giving attention to other women more than yourself. If you love him set him free if it comes back you know that his feelings are true. Maybe he needs a wake up call before he will realize what he could lose in what should be his priority

[Xelebrum]

You do realize that communication is a two way street, right?

[artdaman]

My advice is to move on. If he really wanted to keep you around, you would here from him several times a day.

[Usedtobewise]

You may try to discuss it with him again, if not, you better move on!