They will flake on you if another guy gives her a better offer even if she made a promise to go on date. They will dump you if they are sure that another male who she deems better than you wants a relationship with her and not just a booty call.
Some girls have the sadistic pleasure of leading guys on and thinking they are interested in them when they just want attention then go ghost, once they get a boyfriend.
While dating for men tends to be a numbers game. Average guys usually has to approach A LOT of girls and find one that is willing to go on a date with him.
After which the guy will be more emotional invested and chase the girl because he doesn't know when he's going to get another girl he likes to say yes. So you find men tend to form emotional connection faster, and become almost a bit obsess in wanting to be with the girl.
Men tend to take relationships and dating more serious than women even during the early phases of courtship. Hence, why you'll never see a girl get bent out of shape at an average guy cutting contact with her.
And when the girl flakes on him, goes no contact or even dumps him it tends to hurt men a lot more than it does women because it was more an investment for men than women and women can always find another you.
Remember, woman often post break up can find a new man within a week or even month. A guy will be back to ground zero.
Many young men get strung up on a girl who rejected them, or ghosted on them or even dump them and can't seem to get over the girl for months and years. This kind of thing can eat at a guy's heart until he hardens his heart.
With that being said should more men begin adopting women are replaceable mentality and stop thinking a girl is special? In this way if a girl does any of this shit he can shrug it off his shoulders and stop trying to fight for a girl who thinks of him as backup option at best.
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I just want to respond with, being a male society already see's our gender as disposable. from my perspective thats incredibly unfair and well it can make one feel like they don't matter and are truly worthless if they let it get to them. THAT being said, I don't think ANYONE should be seen as disposable. if you as an individual has the mind set that you can just openly dispose of another unique human being (in an obviously non-violent way lol) at the drop of a hat with no good reason because something "better" comes along then you really should re-evaluate yourself. Everyone has value, everyone has meaning. it's impossible to replace one individual with another because they are just that.. individuals, unique to them and them only. We are human and we do place value on others, its a survival mechanism. If we do deem someone does not have enough value (I. E. is toxic to our lives) then sure go ahead, drop them. But to throw away someone who cares for you and loves you as you are for something that MAY be better... that seems I don't know.. kind of heartless to me. Why would you throw away a good thing? err ANYWAYS sorry for the long rant, my short answer is No we shouldn't because no one is disposable and replaceable and honestly we need to start changing societies views on how it views Men as disposable... I mean think about that, when you stop caring for half of the human population because they are a certain gender... that is a sick way to look at things.
That's not i meant when i said women were disposable in my question. Basically this entire premise is don't treat a girl like she is special. Always have the mindset that if you lose her it's not a big thing because there are plenty of other fish in the sea and that includes standing up for yourself against shitty behavior even if it risk the chance of her leaving you.
thats fair, but I was referring to relationships in my statement, it just wasn't blatant. If you don't treat someone you like as special then why like them? if you treat them as if they are everyone else, what will you then look for in someone you want to spend your life with? and yes thats true there are plenty of fish in the sea, but each fish is unique. I do agree that yes you should stand up for yourself, don't let someone push you around or use you. Also if she is treating you like crap, you really probably shouldn't be with her in the first place so why not leave her? its okay to leave someone you aren't happy with, trust me, I've done it. And just as a little thing to say about your last few words, whenever you get into a relationship of any kind with anyone, you always have risk, especially the risk of them leaving you. But then, do the pros for those relationships out weight the cons? for most its yes. err just saying.
You can like someone without putting them on a pedestal. Too many men treat their GF/wife as special and when the girl dumps them they are moping and sulking and trying to win her back because they have this "one-itis" syndrome that another male poster talked about.
You can like a person but always keep in the back of your mind people are replaceable. Sometimes the girl you are madly in love with will only be in your life for X years and then you break up. Do not act like it's the end of the world and be sad. Realize their are 3 billion other women on the planet and look for another girl rather than moping over some girl who fell out of love with you.
well, first off, men aren't the only one who do this, I'm pretty sure women do it too. secondly why not get your hopes up that the person you are in a relationship might be the one? whats so wrong with thinking positively about that person in such a way? now don't get me wrong I don't think you should raise them up so highly that you can't see their faults or see that they are just as human as the rest of us, but you should still love and treat them in a way that is different/better than others.
Also thats a very pessimistic way to think, going into a relationship, that oh, she will eventually dump me after X number of years. you do what you can to make a relationship last and if it ends because she fell out of love with you then fine, yes there are plenty of other women who would be glad to have you in their lives. But to tell someone to just move on is not the correct way to go about loss. having someone in your life takes a lot of energy, commitment, time-
-and love for that person. losing someone who meant a lot to you is not an easy thing to get over, even if you had seen it coming and tried to salvage what you could with the hopes that things would turn around. It's a loss in someones life, you are losing a person... not quite like death but its still a loss and to tell someone to just get over it, you'll find another, is insensitive to how they are feeling. everyone grieves and grieves differently and for different amounts of time. Grieving doesn't just happen with death.. it also happens with loss.
You ever hear the expression hope for the best but always prepare for the worse. Well most guy when they think that person is the one always get clouded by love and tend to not do the second part leading to many men ending up feeling the way i described in my question and being obsessed over a girl who fell out of love with him. If you keep an abundance mentality that you can find another girl just as good or even better you'll never put yourself in a position where you become obsess over a girl post break up or even rejection. Many men who don't have the abundance mentality tend to end up doing stupid shit like randomly texting their ex of how much they love her or wishing her happy birthday and this girl has already forgotten about you and you doing all this shows to her she still has control over you.
It's not really pessimistic it's being realistic that there is a possibility relationship won't last. If we look at today more than 1/2 of marriages don't last.
And 70% of divorces are initiated by women much less relationships. Always be mindful that it can happen. Too many men go into marriage thinking divorce would not happen to them becaue their girl is so special only to get screwed over. Be mindful shit happens, people change and fall out of love. No one is truly so special that they are worth moping and feeling sorry for losing them.
Yes it's sad when you break up but don't obsess over a girl post break up or think she is so special you need to win her back and make yourself look like an even bigger fool. Move on quickly. There are 3 billion women out there. Too many guys obsess over girls that dump them, rejected them and take that baggage with them through life.
first off, that divorce rate of 50% is not the actual divorce rate. look up the TRUE divorce rate in america... literally those words. gah that statistic frustrates me because its not true. secondly, yes you go into a relationship with the realization that things COULD end, that is realistic, but to EXPECT them to end, that is pessimistic. third, yes divorce happens, and usually for good reason. the reason why most of those women in the 70% are initiating divorce is because they are not satisfied with their marriage. why would anyone want to stay in a relationship they are not happy in? thats not to say there aren't very crappy reasons for someone to divorce another, it does happen, but those are outliers, at least from what I've seen. I do agree with you, one should not obsess over a person they just got out of a relationship, but I will say, when you get into a relationship you learn to have that person in your life, same thing applies for when it ends, you have to learn to not -
-have them in your life as well.
"In the United States, researchers estimate that 40%–50% of all first
marriages, and 60% of second marriages, will end in divorce."
Also even if the divorce were lowering this does not mean that we have plenty have married couples. If we factor in that more people do not want to get married then it would make sense that the divorce rates would go down if less people are signing up for marriage.
Divorce don't usually happen for good reason. Number one reason for divorce is communication as in couples stop talking to one another and grow apart and rather than fix the problem people have a very weak mindset to give up when things get tough. The second common reason for divorce is money. Not enough of it and couples fight over stupid shit.
And most people when they put down their reason for divorce is "irreconcilable differences" which usually sums up to i don't really want to work on my marriage and want out because it's easy.
And one of the main reason women divorce more than men is because court system are gender bias in women favor often giving them a good chunk of the man's asset and property post divorce and the man in financial ruin. So it would be quite easy for a woman to divorce her husband for any frivolous reason and be rewarded post break up.
Now this isn't a government website or university website but it does state the crude divorce rate and the problem with the 50% statistic.