Guys, Why don't men approach me when I go out to clubs?

[MissRosa]

I'm worried because when I go out dancing, I get pretty much no male attention. Once in a while I'll get attention from an unattractive man. But that's it.
I know I'm attractive, but I'm starting to second guess this because guys don't approach me.
I'm worried that I have some major personality flaw that is apparent in the way I carry myself.
here's the thing: I don't drink anymore. So when I go out, I just drink water. Also, I'm shy.. but I know how to make it cute instead of awkward.
I dont know why guys don't give me attention, and the ones that sometimes do are the most unattractive ones at the bar.

[Stone_Fizzlebeef]

Water seeks it's own level. The attractive, well off guys have much better options than you that they don't even have to approach. Why go to McDonald's when you have filet mignon delivering itself to your doorstep?

Also, clubbing isn't something a lot of guys are inclined to do these days. Shitty music, shittier drinks, very public rejection if you make the mistake of speaking to a woman that isn't interested... oh, and if you do succeed and get laid, there's a very high chance that the person you're hooking up with has some kind of STD. Those allegedly ugly guys are the ones desperate enough to brave all of that just for a few minutes of pleasure. God fucking speed, you crazy bastards.

[Alphanutz]

When at a club or bar the objective is to get laid. If I'm talking to someone and she isn't giving me Signs that she's down then it's on to the next. It has nothing to do with you. Hey @SwolDishWasher you have a lot of nerve saying anything. HAVE YOU LOOKED IN THE MIRROR. You are 25 and washed up. Your the same asshole that was posting about hating your female boss. I would be highly surprised if you don't resort to raping women to get laid because from the looks of you (below average from what my wife and her Best friend just said) and the way you talk I know your not getting anything willingly

[SwolDishWasher]

I bet your wife and wifes friend are gona fap to me later. Sry brah

[Alphanutz]

@SwolDishWasher what the he'll is fap you wannabe. Be thankful we don't know each other. If we did i would fap you.

[SwolDishWasher]

LOL!

[Alphanutz]

Fix those lips you closet homo

[SwolDishWasher]

you're the one looking at my lips

[Alphanutz]

@SwolDishWasher if we knew each other you would have stretch marks all around those lips

[SwolDishWasher]

Im glad you dont know me then

[Alphanutz]

@SwolDishWasher you should apologize for your stupid comment. She didn't ask your opinion on her looks and you said that to make her feel like shot when in reality if you did approach her she would have walk away on you.

[SwolDishWasher]

You know what you're right.

Im sorry OP.

[abacusgenius]

Honestly.. if I saw you dancing or in a bar.. I would tell myself that. You are all ready taken, You're pretty. As far as the ugly guys... They are well worn to rejection so they figure what the hell I could give it a shot, all she can say is no. As far as character flaw... Unless you sound like a chipmunk on helium.. I can't imagine. Anything else.

[OpenWine]

Guess the bar is not a good place for finding a mate. I've been doing so in the past and I had few numbers, few kisses here and there and 1 real date with a pretty neat girl. For most of it I didn't really enjoy it cause it felt more like hunting/work than having fun and so I moved on to only partying in trance/techno/bounce clubs where others seem to be on drugs and just having fun. The girls I met were approached in a better condition than when clubbing but the lack of emotional buildup is a personal problem of mine.

[AFBBucks]

A bar is a terrible place to find a mate. As others here have already said, you go there to pick up someone to bang.

[Anonymous]

You look about 19 not 22 so maybe you look too young in the club lights and there worried you snuck in or something.
Other than that it's probly the shyness you mentioned and the ones best at approaching are the ones with most practice generally the creepy "it's a numbers game" guys or old guys that just don't care what pepole think anymore.
Attractive guys get hints from girls so they go for these girls ie touching them specifically on your way past give the right body language and more of the guys you want will get the hint and hit on you.
Attractive guys also get a disproportionate amount of attention more so than is the case for girls for some reason.

[fueledbythc]

Guys aren't obligated to approach and the ones who do approach are the guys who just want to get laid and approach every single girl at the bar. Approaching a girl isn't based off of looks alone but her facial expressions, body language, the way she carries herself. Since you're shy too, it doesn't help at all. Guys probably see your face and think you're high maintenance or you have a resting bitch face.
You seem shallow too. You're attractive but you are proof that looks aren't everything.

[Topkek]

Do you want to know why? Because men are SICK of having to pander to every woman who think that she's entitled to everything. Not to mention you sound like a typical golddigger and you have a terrible personality.
Stop being so goddamn shallow, and how about YOU try approaching a guy for once?

[sodaa_popp]

Approachability is all about the signals you send via body language and facial expressions. Start out by practicing good eye contact with the guy you want to approach you.

[AFBBucks]

If men you consider attractive aren't approaching you, then you are probably trying to punch above your weight. What are men you deem acceptable supposed to look like? Brad Pitt?

[zorro8888]

Could be anything at this point lol are you usually with a group of your own friends? That can intimidate some guys.

[Princeofanons]

Do you really want some loser guys hitting on you in a club? Wouldn't you like quantity over quality?

[Princeofanons]

Quality over quantity my bad*

[MissRosa]

That's a good point

[Anonymous]

you sound really picky. i've approached pretty much every woman i ever was interested and got shot down every time so i don't approach anymore. if women were more accepting of ugly men like myself, it might not be as bad as you think

[MissRosa]

I believe physical attraction is important, just like personality is important

[DapperMelody]

Oh. Canada.

I happen to be an expert in this subject. Answer: most people in bars/clubs are ugly.

[MissRosa]

There's lots of attractive men and women at the bars I go to

[DapperMelody]

What. Which one is the best one? I wanna check their pics.

[AleDeEurope]

Maybe you have a resting bitch face, or look like you won't put out.

[MissRosa]

Lol maybe, I don't dress like I won't put out though. The resting bitch face is possible, because I'm shy so I sometimes get overwhelmed by crowds

[AleDeEurope]

See, maybe that's why. I have a resting bitch face too, so I'm forced to be the one approaching people, and I'm kinda shy too, so sometimes I end up with empty hands when I go out, simply because that night I was feeling less outgoing.
If you're shy and with a resting bitch face, you don't look approachable, and if you spend the night around your friends, you're even less approachable.

[MissRosa]

That makes sense, thanks!! :)

[AFBBucks]

My BS alarm just went off. You said that you're "shy", then imply that you put out.

Which one is it?

[Brontosaurus]

I must be missing something. Just take the pic you posted and create an account with it on Tinder.

[AiNtNoSuNsHiNe]

easy, you look wayy to pretty to be single, or being easy to talk too.., if I go out at night and i wanna have fun I won't approach the prettiest girl in the bar and get the chance of getting rejected, that would ruin the mood for a couple of weeks.

[Anonymous]

Maybe show some guts and approach guys?
Why do women always expect men to approach them.

[MissRosa]

It's because I'm really shy and sometimes get overwhelmed in crowds. And embarrassingly enough I've never actually danced with a guy before.. I guess I'm just hoping there will be men who are more dominant types who will approach me, but there never is

[Opinion Owner]

You don't have to go all they way in. Just try being approachable. Go sit next to a guy you like (cue eye contact+smile)

[MissRosa]

Okay I'll try that when I'm feeling more outgoing, thank you :)

[AFBBucks]

Never danced with a guy before? Suuuuuure. If you're really that shy and have never danced with a guy, why are you in a bar? I think you're a troll.

[Iraqveteran666]

Your shyness sends the signal that your am unobtainable mega bitch

[MisterSir]

"Once in a while I'll get attention from an unattractive man."

okay, are you getting attention or not?

[MissRosa]

Once in a while, most of the time no. And never from an attractive man..

[MisterSir]

so maybe... approach men YOU find attractive?
dudes don't know that you think they're unattractive, y'know?

[MissRosa]

I've never even thought of that, thanks :)

[MisterSir]

legit don't know if you're sarcastic or not lol
if you're aren't, then you're welcome!

[MissRosa]

I'm not!! Haha

[Guy_No1]

Are you serious, if I saw you out, I would have to talk to you, and I'd find a way to talk to you for sure.

[AFBBucks]

She didn't say no one was approaching her, just "unattractive" men. I suspect that her bar must be set pretty high.

[SevenSkies]

You're too pretty to be approached by most men. Only the boldest guys, and guys with nothing to lose will approach you.

Also, a lot of men have been put off approaching women because of feminism.

[Blitzkrieger]

Have you tried flirting with them or maybe approaching them?

[Dabro]

scared of failure? And not even bothering to try?

[MissRosa]

Scared to try as in make the first move, yes :/

[Dabro]

exactly. its issue of insecurity. seems most man feel insecure these days.

[Truthatanycost]

I disagree. Also, insecurity pretty much vanishes after a few shots. I used to approach girls all over the place and a few times I could feel my heart racing because you never know what to expect, but I did it anyway. Nowadays I don't think the majority of girls are worth approaching so I don't. Nothing to do with insecurity.

[Dabro]

True not worth the primadona drama go through... But still gotta keep trying...

[GouravDas]

its because ur flat. grow some tits

[MissRosa]

Lol okay no problem, I'll just miraculously grow bigger tits, thank god biology works like that

[GouravDas]

why? i hear soya beens help out

[MissRosa]

Lol who knows. I've learned to love my body the way it is though, and a lot of guys love the size they are. So I'm not worried about it.

[GouravDas]

yeah keep saying this after your marriage when husband will troll u for ur tits

[MissRosa]

Lol I don't even plan to get married, kid.

[GouravDas]

haha call me kid until u see my schlong

[MissRosa]

I'm never going to, thank god

[GouravDas]

right u are happy with 5 inches.. never felt 8 inch have u? lol

[MakingMeHiiiigh]

Possibly they're intimidated?

[MissRosa]

Maybe. That's best case scenario lol

[MakingMeHiiiigh]

trying smiling at guys you like in the bar, body language relaxed, they'll feel more inclined to approach haha

[Truthatanycost]

That's the best case scenario for the ego yes...

[AFBBucks]

Here's a novel idea: How about YOU approach guys that you like?

[deathyy]

id approach you in a bar 😊

[NajemEddine]

maybe your personality

[Anonymous]

A wild guess: shy, not relaxed, picky.

[Anonymous]

You're pretty, but I wouldn't approach you

[SwolDishWasher]

You're average

[Alphanutz]

Dishwasher talking shit. Your pathetic. Wash those dishes fuckboy

[SwolDishWasher]

I am sorry OP

[xxAjjxx]

It's funny how people get mad when you express an honest opinion that's viewed negative

[Alphanutz]

@xxAjjxx your obviously not very smart my man. The whole point was she didn't ask for an opinion on her looks she asked why she isn't getting approached. This right here is why you cannot succeed in life. Your way to stupid

[xxAjjxx]

@Allhanutz thanks for proving my point